It’s a recurring scene in Starfleet in the various incarnations of Star Trek. You’ve probably seen it: a subordinate thinks the commanding officer is being an idiot, wants to say what’s really on his mind, and asks, “Permission to speak freely, sir?” Permission is invariably granted, and then the subordinate is able to talk to the C.O. much more bluntly than he would otherwise.
Is that a question that would be asked in the contemporary U.S. military, or any others you know of? If not, is there some equivalent phrase?
When I was in the Navy, I never said it, nor did I ever hear of anyone saying it, or anything like it. We just spoke freely (and tactfully, usually). If our superior didn’t want to hear it, he would say “enough!”, or something to indicate we should shut up. And we would shut up.
I do recall one incident in particular – we (the crew of the submarine) were getting ready for some sort of inspection by some fleet people. It was a periodic evaluation for tacitical readiness (or something like that). Going down some list of what we were supposed to be ready for, the XO (Executive officer) assigned each of us JOs (Junior officers) with a specific tactical subject area to prepare a presentation for. None of these presentations were likely to be used – the XO just wanted us to be ready. We had about a day or two to do it, in addition to all the other stuff we would be preparing for the evaluation.
So we were assigned these various topics, started to do some research, and quickly realized that these were way, way beyond what someone could hope to become proficient in in just a day. We asked to meet with the XO, and all the other JOs were sort of beating around the bush about what was wrong, so I just spoke up – I said “XO, right now the best I’m hoping for – the best possible outcome – is that I put together a shitty presentation that you will yell at me for.” And all the other JOs chimed in agreement, after a moment of surprise. And the XO yielded, and decided that this probably was not the best use of our time.
But there were senior officers who would have immediately shut us up if we complained about something. So it all depended on the officer.
I don’t know about real life but Tom Clancy used this device a couple of times in his novels. So it seems the idea may have origins in a grain of truth.
Former Naval Officer. I don’t recall ever seeing anybody written up/at Captain’s Mast for wanting to “speak freely,” which wouldn’t include cursing and insubordination.
I never felt the need to address a superior in a manner that I couldn’t speak and need to take it to a “speak freely” way. My immediate superiors were Department Heads and the conversations were generally casual anyway; my limited interactions with the XO and CO were more formal.
I was never in a situation with a subordinate where they asked to speak freely to me. I attempted to have an “open door” policy and be approachable but did use the chain of command: for informal matters (general duties, Watch Bill assignments) talk to their supervisor-Leading Petty Officer-Chief; for formal matters like transferring to another Department they’d fill out a request chit that I’d see anyway after it worked its way up.
I did do a bit of “creative writing speak freely” once. One of my stellar petty officers was written up for something silly. I did my investigation and recommended it be dismissed, then passed it on to my Department Head who concurred, from there it went to the XO. (For those unfamiliar with the process, the CO sees all report chits, he is the only one who can dismiss it.) I waited for it to go to Captain’s Mast, it seemed to be taking a while. Then one day in the passageway I ran into the XO who told me the charge had been dismissed by the Captain “but to never again refer to a write-up as a Mickey Mouse charge.” So my superiors had agreed with me but not the language I used
In Master and Commander, Jack Aubrey’s First Lieutenant asks, “May I make an observation, Sir?” before an attack. Jack replies, “As long as it isn’t a council of war. This is not a G-d damned debating society.”
Clancy’s observations of the military were nearly all second hand (though his books are mostly meticulously researched.) The closest he got to military service was college ROTC.
I place it at about the same level of realism as saying “With all due respect” immediately before saying something disrespectful, and not getting slammed for the lack of respect.
I was never in the military, but have worked with civilian military employees for years. Once, I was a junior engineer at a consulting company, working on a project for the Army. Our VP, who was handling the client, called me in to explain a technical detail to the big-wig from the Army. Halfway through my explanation, the Army guy held up his hand and said, “Wait. Can I ask a stupid question?”
I had never liked this dude. I looked him in the eye and said, “Like nobody I know, Jim.”
The VP just about swallowed his face trying to walk back my smart-ass comment. Needless to say, I wasn’t called in to deliver any more technical explanations.
I have never heard it said in 26 years of full and part time military service. There were times when discussion was expected and times when it wasn’t. Usually time and mission dependent. There were no magic words. No words that can allow you to be a dick about something to your superior officer. There are unwritten protocols for handling disagreement.
Have never asked it, and have never heard it asked, and as an advisor, sometimes my job is actually to point out the flaws in something (worked with both Army and Air Force, various countries, up to the rank of General).
I have, however, given subordinates a “go ahead and say what’s on your mind” at times…I find sometimes the non-commissioned ranks get a little antsy (and rightly so) about debating with an officer.
slight tangent: Are the statements that usually follow “… speak freely?” in movies the type of thing be unacceptable in a public setting, but tolerable in a private (i.e. not in front of subordinates, ) but official conversation (e.g. in somebody’s office)? The sort of thing you wouldn’t say at an official hearing, but don’t need to go “off the record” for (or whatever the mil-speak version of “this conversation never happened” is), either.
Or is it never acceptable to be brutally honest and blunt with a superior officer, if that were necessary to make them understand/consider something?
If something comes up during a briefing that is either not appropriate to discuss in a group setting (due to privacy, or something else) we will often say “Let’s continue this offline…”
I have often been blunt and honest to make sure there is clear understanding of the impact - but not usually disrepectful. There is a huge difference. You can call an idea/plan/course of action misguided and idiotic, but you shouldn’t call the planner idiotic.
It very much can be. I’ve heard people use it like that more often than not.
You know how “I’m not racist but…” often precedes a racist utterance? How some people think that preceding their utterance with that hedging makes it less likely to be perceived as racist when in fact it makes it more likely? The hedging “with all due respect” is like that.
I’ve also heard that if a Southern/old woman tells you “bless your heart”, she’s pretty much told you to go fuck yourself.
So, next time someone tells you: “With all due respect, bless your heart.”, you’ll know it wasn’t a compliment.
The translation of some of these Southern things is not universal so if you will ever have skin the game with that person, you better learn them because ‘always’ means you are very wrong very often.
