Option 6: Sweet Caroline!
[wait]
Good times never seemed so good!
[wait again]
I work in a medical center, so considering the amount of bodily function issues that tend to go on due to sick people, I’d start worrying if I heard cries for help (muttering of “help me, Jesus” due to apparent constipation doesn’t count; true story) or saw bodily fluids coming out from under the stall.
Otherwise, I assume whatever you’re doing in there, you’re doing for a reason that I shouldn’t be bothering you about. Well, with the exception of whoever pisses on the back of the toilet/floor by the wall now and then. I’m tending towards hoping she injures herself doing whatever gymnastics are required to pull off that stunt.
It’s a cheap company’s nap room; wouldn’t be the first time, either.
My guess is work-avoidance.
I’d be worried if I saw bodily fluids or there were gurgling/choking/gagging sounds. Or if there was an actual body curled up on the floor. Otherwise, I’d mind my own business. I don’t like when someone comments about my bathroom habits*. I know people can’t help but notice some things, but I’d still rather not know what they’re thinking. Especially if it comes across as faux-concern. (Not saying you weren’t really concerned, Anaamika, but sometimes people say they are worried about something when really they are just dying of curiosity.)
*A former coworker used to do this to me. She’d always nag me for not drinking enough water during the day, so every time she caught me in a stall was a cause for celebration since in her mind peeing meant I had been drinking enough. It sounds weirder than it was, and it was kinda funny. But it could be irksome sometimes. There’s nothing like being in the middle of changing your tampon and having someone pass by the stall door yelling, “I see you’ve had your water today, girl!! Woohoo!!”
I don’t know women’s room etiquette, but the general thing that I see men do:
Go to obviously locked stall door. Push on the door, even though it is obviously locked. Rattle the lock, even though it is obviously locked. Wait for a response from the occupant, through their teeth.
The other male option is to take a shit, but neglect to lock the door even though it is functional, so someone walks in on you at least 3 times. Make no attempt to warn people off or brace the door.
If she’s not making a sound this is the highest probability.
VERY clever!
I used to work in a small office building and one of our colleagues used to go to the ladies room a lot and spend a fair amount of time there. Turns out she was in there drinking.
And it’s even older than that:
drinking what?
Drinking alcohol. :rolleyes:
One day she went too far and told off the chairman of the board to his face in the hallway, enveloping him in her boozy breath. He fired her.
To answer the OP: 24 hours.
Great, now I’ve got that Clapper song stuck in my head…
Tamp off
Tamp on
Tamp off, tamp on…
Tampon!
I used to have a coworker who would go to the ladies’ room several times a day, always for exactly the same amount of time. It turned out she was a smoker, but was embarrassed about it, so she only smoked in the ladies’ room, where she could air out before returning to work.
TRUE story:
I had a friend who was in his late 60’s, seriously depressed, alcoholic, and his apartment was full of clutter, including piles of empty bottles (or so he told me) that he sometimes fell over.
One day I was talking to him on the phone, long distance from a far away city, when he excused himself for a minute. (He didn’t say why, but I knew he was going to take a pee.)
He didn’t return to the phone. After I waited for about 20 minutes, I called 911 and explained some of the above. With some hassle, the local 911 (in my city) managed to contact the police in my friend’s city.
About 20 minutes later, my friend called me back, wanting to thank me 10000 times. He had indeed fallen in the bathroom, and couldn’t get up, and peed (or maybe shit) all over himself. The cops showed up and with the help of a neighbor (who had a key) got in and took care of him.
Well, either that or your building has an absolutely fantastic janitorial staff.
I’d go in and say “I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you’re looking for ransom, I can tell you I don’t have money but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that will be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you.”
Actually that probably wouldn’t work, so maybe the lights going out or similar question.
I can’t help thinking of that young lady who was sitting on the toilet for YEARS, and she actually started growing into the seat. I think it was her brother who wouldn’t let her leave.