Attack of the Moderator Sycophants - Part XXX

The BBQ Pit
1

Unfortunately not as funny as Fenris’ thread. But he does not seem inclined to start this one, so I’ll give it a shot.

(All similarities to real posters and mods are accidental).

Poster1: blah blah bla…

Moderator1: [Moderator hat on]
This kind of thing cannot be tolerated here…I am warning you etc.
[moderator hat off]

Poster1: yeah, but -

Admin: that’s it jerk, you’re banned. Go play somewhere else.

[Long silence]

Poster2: I wonder…does anyone…nah, forget it [scurries away]

[long silence]

Poster3: Does anyone know why Poster1 was banned?

Poster4: Seems strange to me.

Sycophant1: How dare you criticize the moderators?! The number one rule of this board is “don’t be a jerk”. Clearly Poster1 was being a jerk. In fact, I’ve known him to be jerk from his very first post to this board, but the mods were very patient with him. But when I saw this post I just knew that this would be the final straw. I, by contrast am not a jerk, so I won’t be banned. Just watch.

Sycophant2: How could anyone even wonder about the actions of the mods and admins? To question their actions demonstrates a lack of pure faith in their perfection - it’s heresy!

Sycophant3: Even when we see the administration doing something strange, we must only strengthen the faith in our hearts that the admins - in their infinite wisdom - know better than us. They see things that we cannot see, they know things that we cannot know, they understand things that we cannot begin to fathom.

Sycophant2: Yeah, you’re right, Sycophant3. Why for all we know, Poster1 has made death threats against the mods and admins. He may even be linked to the WTC bombing. I’m glad we have the admins to protect us from jerks like Poster1.

Poster3: Of course, of course, I never meant to question the admins. My faith in their perfection is as great as anyone. I bow daily in their general direction. [sub](Please don’t ban me).[/sub] I only ask for some clarification of their action so that I might better understand what they would like of me, that I might better do their wishes.

Sycophant1: Listen jerk, this is a free MB. The mods have the authority to do whatever they want. Who do you think you are to ask anything?

Moderator2: OK kids, that’s enough fightin’

[Locks thread]

[Peace and harmony prevail throughout the realm]

2

Everyone’s got a toadie.

'Cept you :smiley:

3

pretty good,
but you forgot to use the “throwing people out of a party” example. I’ve never seen a Banning thread where that didn’t come up

4

Yeah, but…
I’d like to add my perspective to this:

LivingInTerror: I am afraid for my LIFE! The mods are on a RAMPAGE! They’re banning people RANDOMLY and I live in MORTAL TERROR that I will be next.

ModSupporter: But…it’s been shown time and time again that there’s usually a good reason for banning. There’s almost always multiple incidents, so one slip-up won’t get you banned in most cases. And every time you say that it was a random banning!

LivingInTerror: <wails> I’m gonna be NEXT!

or our old friends

No,It’sMYboard: No one should be treated like that. BANNEDGUY had every right to be here and post. The mods are out of control. Things shouldn’t be this way. I demand they be changed. I also demand an explanation!

ModSupporter: Um…it’s not your board. The Mods don’t have to give you an explaination.

No,It’sMYboard: Well, they should.

Or (absent in recent weeks)
THEY’LLbeBack!: It doesn’t matter if BANNEDGUY was banned, he’ll just get another name and log-on.

All kidding aside, Izzy, it seems to me that nearly every time someone’s banned, someone complains that it was unfair, or demands/requests an explanation, etc.

I don’t think the Admins should give explanations. First, it puts them in the position of having to defend their actions and
A) they have no obligation to defend their actions
and
b) obligations aside, it may not be something that they choose to defend in public.

What if a banned poster was threating lawsuits via e-mail or just sending threats? The Admins couldn’t say anything. I doubt that was the case here, but who knows what goes on behind the scenes and in many cases I suspect that the Admins can’t respond.

I have never heard a good reason why people just don’t e-mail the Admins/Mods if they’re concerned that they’ll commit some minor faux pas and be banned (“just like BANNEDGUY!” :rolleyes: )

Fenris

5

Well now’s your chance to get in on the ground floor. By becoming my first toadie, you get to be declared Right Hand Toadie, and get to rule over all subsequent Lesser Toadies.

6

Expressing an opinion about the administration of the board makes you a either “Mod Sycophant” or leaves you “Living In Terror?”

Um, yeah, sure… :rolleyes:

Esprix

7

“My First Toadie”

Sounds like a kit…

8

All kidding aside, this thread wouldn’t exist. I don’t deny that I believe my portrayal has some degree of truth to it, but I meant it in a more lighthearted vein. The characters you portray (LiT et al) are also based on reality, IMHO.

Come on, Esprix, didn’t you hear the President’s speech? “Everyone must make a choice. Either you are with us, or you are with the terrorists”.

9

IzzyR is right.

It’s not as funny as Fenris’ thread.

In fact, it’s not funny at all, in my humble opinion.

But, hey, your kilometerage may vary.

10

You’re just jealous you weren’t given screen credit for Sycophant2. :stuck_out_tongue:

11

Geez, I just realized it.

You’re right, Demise.

That’s me to a tee. Who do you have to know to get some recognition around here?

12

Hey slip, as I said, all similarities to real posters is accidental. But if you don’t find it funny, feel free to ignore this thread and all my other posts.

Now that’s funny. :smiley:

13

And jealous that this thread hasn’t devolved into a Monty Python quotefest.

[sub]Yet[/sub]

14

Just an opinion, but I think the reason the party metaphor comes up every time is because it’s a good one- it is, in fact, an illustration of the central principle involved which is, every nasty unpleasant thing the administration has ever done to anyone is balanced by the fact that they made the board possible.

I mean, let’s take the most evil paranoid view of the administration we can and measure the good against the bad:

Bad: Banned a lot of people unfairly.

Good: Donated hours and hours of their time; pay for the board to exist; host the board on their server; fix the board when it crashes.

Let’s say 10% of the board has been banned unfairly. It’s ridiculous, but let’s say the board is that insane. That’s still 90% of how many thousand people registered here that they’ve provided a huge service for. Even from the most paranoid view, we owe the mods tons, and people need to be reminded. The party metaphor is a useful way to illustrate that.

–John

15

Don’t you worry about warts?

16

“She turned me into a newt!”

17

…and Baby Jesus wept.

18

John- I like to think of this place not so much as a party, but as a school. A school made up of a thousand virtual classrooms created by the students themselves. Anyone can make a classroom based around an idea and students may come and go as they please to comment or debate the idea. All are welcome to stay, go, speak or be silent - freely but within the limits of the law (much like our free speech in America). The purpose? To promote the free flow of intelligent thought, to educate, to enlighten and, perhaps, to make this shitty little world a bit better and brighter for us all.

Of course, there are rules, moderators and administrators to keep things running and in order. And God bless em - cause without em, this place wouldn’t exist and the world would be just that much shittier (for me, at least).

But again, like America, the citizens have a right to question the authority. Nobody “invited” my mother to this country, but as soon as she became a citizen, she was granted the same rights as those who came over on the Mayflower. No more and no less. Doesn’t matter how damn long she was here. And one of the great things about this country is our right to question the rules as long as we stay within the rules while doing so. In fact, a society that prevents people from speaking based on an arbitrary set of rules and not a standard applied to all is a society I don’t want to live in. If that happens, I’ll simply leave.

But until then, let me speak my mind (I know it’s small and oft confused, but it’s all I got). And if a fellow student gets expelled from school, I wanna know why. Not just because it may further clarify the rules for me, but also because it means we’ve lost another voice here which may have contributed to our own erudition.

19

If being your toadie is like being your bitch, sign me up!

20

IzzyR wrote:

But…but…I like your posts. I just didn’t think this one was funny, that’s all. Now I should ignore all your posts?

Fuck that. I’m going to do a search and read a bunch of them, and there’s nothing you can do about it.

You don’t know who you’re dealing with, mister.