Inspired by comments in this thread on the almost certainly horrible upcoming film “I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry”. In that film, Adam Sandler’s character, a heterosexual masquerading as a homosexual for some contrived reason, must conceal conceal his true orientation before Jessica Biel. Biel, naturally, not only undresses in front of the apparently gay man, but invites him to feel her up. My question, does anyone actually think like that?
Let’s leave aside getting to second base (I suspect the answer is no, unless he’s a doctor or you’re getting your nipple pierced), and talk about the nudity. On a scale from 1 to 10 (1 being “if my shirt were on fire, I’d still ask him to turn around before I took it off”, and 10 being “if it weren’t for those pesky public indecency laws, I’d be nude all the time. Ah! Feel the breeze!”) How comfortable would you feel being mostly or completely nude in front of the following people:
A: A platonic female friend who is heterosexual.
B: A platonic female friend who is homosexual.
C: A platonic male friend who is heterosexual.
D: A platonic male friend who is homosexual.
E: Your lover, in a completely non-sexual situation.
(I apologize for leaving out bisexuals, but for this poll, just consider them lumped in with the sex/orientation combos that could be attracted to you).
Assume that you know and trust all of the above enough that you feel secure that they won’t be driven into a frenzy by your uncovered beauty, and won’t do anything more than enjoy the view. Also assume, for this hypothetical, that you are either single or that your SO doesn’t really care about such things. Please also state your gender and sexual orientation.
My hypothesis is that societal views on modesty and body image are strong enough that people would only be marginally more comfortable in front a member of the opposite sex that they believe cannot be attracted to them than one that they think might be.
It depends in what context, I suppose. A gym locker room? A beach? A bedroom? My best guesses (assuming the other person was comfortable - if I was making anyone uncomfortable, I’d be uncomfortable too):
I am very open-minded about many things but I gotta admit I still have a lot of hangups about nudity. The only people who have ever seen me nude or close to nude are:
My doctor. And you know how doctors do it, these days they only expose the parts they need to see.
Close & immediate members of my family, and since I became an adult, never without underwear at least
Past lovers and my current SO
And that is the way it will remain. I don’t change in front of my girlfriends. I don’t borrow their clothes. I certainly wouldn’t change in front of any male other than himself.
Female, straight.
Upon review, like many people, I don’t consider “beach” or “locker room” to be in the same category. And why? Because everyone’s doing it. My thought upon reading the OP was it was just me and this other person.
If a female friend (straight or gay) is over at my house and I need to change my clothes, I don’t close the bedroom door. If a male straight friend is, I do (unless he’s my lover). I can’t imagine any other situation where I would be nude when nobody else is.
So aside from that I don’t differentiate between the categories you list - if I’d disrobe in front of a straight female I’d disrobe in front of a straight guy; if not the former, then not the latter.
I have been nude in front of straight men who aren’t my lover in the same situations in which I would be nude in front of straight women, namely, saunas and hot tubs and beaches and so on.
A+B: I’d say 4, but that is more for their benefit than mine.
C+D: 10
E: 10
I think there has to be a distinction here. If one of my male friends started walking around the house naked that would elicit a “dude, put some clothes on”, but changing doesn’t bother me at all.
Female, age 35 and a-e are all 10. I figure everyone has approximately the same body parts, some may look a bit better than others, but aside from penises (penii?) being outies and vajayjays being innies…it’s all just flesh.
Now, I do try to cover myself if I know someone is coming to my home, but most of the time, I am nekkid as a jaybird. Meh…just the way I am.
For clarification, the situation I’m envisioning is something more private and intimate than a locker room (and thus without the automatic implied “don’t look” social contract), but still without any intent to arouse the viewer. Changing clothes in a private bedroom is a decent example.
Straight female, probably would be considered pretty modest.
Female friends (don’t give a shit about orientation): I would whip off tops and bottoms without a thought (underwear on), probably wouldn’t mind the bra, wouldn’t want to go the full monty. Things like locker rooms or changing into a swimsuit, you do your own thing and basically don’t look at anyone else.
Men: Wouldn’t change any underwear-revealing article in front of them unless I had to. Again, orientation doesn’t matter since the issue isn’t whether they will be stunned by my byew-tay, but whether I will make them or myself uncomfortable.
Lover (which would be male): Nekkid when appropriate, but I don’t have the body confidence to march around buck-naked in front of anyone else without a reason.
As a soldier, you get used to a lack of privacy. In addition, my wife almost never has pants on when she is home. So, modesty has gone out the window for me. I can and have taken a baby wipe bath in front of member of the opposite and same sex. No big deal as long as no one acts in a lewd manner.
Pretty much 10 for all of them, as I’m pretty close to the philosophy you mentioned in your op: “If it weren’t for those pesky laws, I’d be naked all the time.”
Not at work, of course. Not even out in public. But someday when I’m a little older I can envision myself moving to a nudist colony so I can check my mailbox without putting my pants back on.
I’ve been in underwear in all the situations you’ve mentioned, although I never know for sure whether my platonic friends are gay or not.
I’m a straight female.
Not too shy about being naked in front of anyone. This is a stupid excuse but when you’re in band in high school there’s a lot of group changing that’s done. I’ve been in my skiv’s in front of plenty of casual hetero guy friends and naked plenty of times with girl friends.
I’ve even been to a nudist group’s swim, just for fun
Oddly enough my boyfriend thinks I’m totally prude because I hate being in my front room with my shirt off (or more) when the blinds aren’t drawn. Yes indeed I am afraid of the neighbors seeing me but that’s way off of this poll’s scale I’d think
Well to me the key word in the above scenarios is “friend”. I am equally comfortable naked around all of my friends regardless of orientation. A platonic friend is platonic so it shouldn’t matter. My only hang up in letting it all hang out is not wanting to go against their own feelings on nudity. Admittedly, I don’t just let it fly whenever I’m sitting around in the living room with friends, but if you plan on staying in the bathroom to shave or apply makeup while I’m in the shower then I have no problem stripping down and hopping in. So for A-D my answer is 8. With E, my answer is 10.
Well, in college, I worked as a nude model for a couple of art classes. One was at a women’s school. The other was coed. Context, of course, is key. I’m not interested in being naked around a person who could, theoretically, be sexually attracted to me unless it’s okay in context (like, we’re all at a nudist resort).
This happens to me from time to time as I have male friends drop by unexpectedly, so I’ll often be lounging around in my boxers. After letting them in and chit-chat for a little while, I wander into my bedroom to get properly dressed to go out for lunch (or whatever it is they came over for). Almost always the friend will tag along with me because we’re involved in conversation or something, and I’ll stip down and get dressed while we carry on the chat. This has happened with both gay and straight male friends.
I look at it as not much different than a locker room situation. In fact even less forbidden since (1) I’m at home and (2) the other guy is a friend. If it was a female friend or some random male stranger I doubt the same thing would happen.
That scene is nothing but soft core porn to get the target audience into the theater. I suspect much of the movie contains material of similar intellectual depth and therefore I won’t be going anywhere near it.
With a military career behind me, I lost any bashfulness about nudity long ago. The wife, kids and I used to go camping at an isolated spot on a creek, w/ a nice sandbar. We got into the habit of skinny dipping, the kids made an issue at first, but it soon became quite natural, no sexual aspect at all, just good fun. I go every three months for a bladder exam, my doc’s very gay male nurse, prepares my penis while we chat about various things, no sexual reaction or embarassment involved.
Like someone else said, my primary concern for getting undressed in front of females isn’t my comfort level, but their’s. Not many people really feel comfortable in front of a naked man.
