From the continent that brought you playpuses, kangaroos, and baby-eating dingos, not to mention most of the world’s most poisonous snakes, spiders, and insects, comes the giant fluorescent pink slugs. Apparently hiding for millions of years, these were just discovered. I’m sure next they’ll find that they’re highly poisonous and can squirt acid from a foot away. Also in the same story, cannibal slugs.
I’m beginning to think that “Australia” is a massive practical joke. Everyone who claims to be from there or have been there are pulling a fast one on the rest of the planet.
Yeah, “Australia” was basically photoshopped onto the maps of the world in the late sixties, and then they started to retcon all kinds of bizarre stuff into it. Even the museum workers got in on the joke, which explains the stuffed “Victorian” platypuses. They were made late one Saturday night after a few too many beers, and since the Director was involved in the joke, they couldn’t back down later…
The article implies that this is a new discovery. But it also implies they’re not really rare (“On a good morning, you can walk around and see hundreds of them.”) If that’s the case, how would something so outlandish have been overlooked until now? These things must be not just newly discovered, but actually new.
Therefore, the only explanation is that these things are from outer space! Earth is being invaded by Giant Fluorescent Pink Slugs from Outer Space!
Fortunately the Fluorescent Pink Space Slugs made the suicidal error of landing in Australia, so I imagine they’ll be quickly killed and devoured by the countless venomous, toothy, or otherwise deadly lifeforms that swarm over every square foot of that Hell Continent.
Perhaps the dingos can be trained to eat pink slugs, rather than babies.
Well when it comes to weird things that hop, crawl, fly or slither we (and the Kiwis) have done OK.
When it comes to weird, wacky and preposterous things that walk on two legs, you merkins have us beat all ends up.
The only things trained to swallow an 8 inch pink slug currently work in Porn.
Hmmm… you could have something there… they do have that big pink lake ( Google Search ) … so, maybe this is alien vomit and those are alien worms… it is really going to suck if it turns out that the aliens are Bronies and My Little Pony is real.
Fortunately the Fluorescent Pink Space Slugs made the suicidal error of landing in Australia, so I imagine they’ll be quickly killed and devoured by the countless venomous, toothy, or otherwise deadly lifeforms that swarm over every square foot of that Hell Continent.
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It’s just a slug. We need them to keep the earthworms company.
Pfffft. Like no-one’s ever seen one of those before. Mine has 3 speeds.
But, but… Aussies are so cool about things like this. I wouldn’t be surprised if a holiday is created just for them (bless the little buggers) and safari photo shoots are Fostered (beer.)
They don’t spit anything corrosive, but check out velvet worms. They’re not worms, annelids, nematodes, platyhelmiths, molluscs, or insects, but their own grouping. Insects are closest, but no slime covered cigar. The youtube videos are interesting and creepy.
Cannibal snails. We actually have cannibal slugs in America. Not just cannibal slugs, but hermaphrodite cannibal slugs. Not just hermaphrodite cannibal slugs, but perverted cannibalistic hermaphrodites haunt the Pacific Northwest!
What I don’t understand is how those imported rabbits got out of control. This is Australia. If they had released grizzly bears into the wild in Australia, you’d expect them to get eaten by the native wildlife. How did rabbits manage to survive?
When Iraqis want to show displeasure with their Prime Minister, they throw shoes.
In Australia, it’s sandwiches!
I take it you’ve never watched Monty Python and the Holy Grail?
So they eat themselves?
sharp bitey teeth
And you should see the fish we catch with those beauties
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Melbourne has a nice little pink lake now too.
Pfff. Been there, done that.
