Hey, I know this topic probably gets recycled like crazy. But I want to see what folks around here have encountered lately in the form of bad baby names. This was inspired by the thread about the chick who named her son Zao, which I can’t believe (it rhymes with mayo, no less!?!!?) someone did to their poor newborn. Anyway, some of the worst baby names I’ve encountered have been the classic “Amanda Lynn” (I love bluegrass music and I immediately had to stifle gut-busting laughter when the mom told me that one!), Rocky, Da’Own (yes that was a real one), and Destynee.
I have never personally known anybody who gave their baby a truly horrific name. These came from acquaintances and people I met randomly. (Of course, if these were people I knew, I would like to think I would have been able to somehow talk them out of their insanity!). Anybody else have their encounters with bad baby names to share? Stories about near-misses where you talked your hapless friend/relative out of inflicting a similar torture on their poor son or daughter? Bad baby names.
My friend’s baby is named Janus Thor. She gets comments, but I think it’s cool… her hub’s mother is Danish, and hub’s name is Jan, so there’s reasons for the name.
Actress Shannyn Sossamon named her son, Audio Science. The babydaddy is a DJ. I’m not making that up.
My cousin is having a baby soon and he wants to name it Zavior (yeah, like Jesus with a Z) if it’s a boy. His girlfriend likes Tristan. I don’t really want to know what girl names they might be considering. Poor kid.
At my job, we have a Beneatha Lake, Trigger somebody, Luverne, Soontorn, Neehmanyah (male), and Dewayne Littles, Jr.; that one just strikes me as funny for some reason.
I used to live near a family that named their young children Darren, Sharon, Karen and Aaron.
Now, there’s nothing wrong with any of these names, but when they are bawled a the top of your voice in quick succession; “Darren! Sharon! Karen! Aaron! stop kicking the fucking dog!” it just isn’t right, somehow.
There was another family in the same street who I think just made up nonsensical, polysyllabic names for their children; I can’t even remember what they were now though.
I used to know a family who named their daughter Bronte. Like the author. They got it from the movie Greencard. (And no, I do not know how to do the little two dots over the “e,” and I’m not bored enough to find out how.)
Seriously, people. Can anybody think of a few handy nicknames she’ll get in school? Bronte-saurus, just for starters?
Their other daughter was named Trinity; this was ten years ago, but I imagine her coolness ratio has gone up considerably since the Matrix movies.
My own name, which has never been revealed to the members of SDMB, sounds innocuous until you realize it’s inexorably tied to a legendary sitcom from the 70’s. Which I have to hear about EVERY SINGLE TIME I introduce myself to anyone. My parents didn’t do it on purpose, but I don’t care; I’m extremely bitter.
It’s hard to keep smiling the ten billionth time somebody makes the same joke about your name.
My dad claims that my mother wanted to name me “Shad”. The story goes that he said, “Hell, if you want to name him Shad, why don’t we just go all the way and call him CARP!”.
My fifth grade teacher, who was probably born in the late 40’s, was named Royce Ann. She said that when she was a kid her classmates would yell, “Keep 'em rolling, Royce!” at her. Years later she met a former schoolmate who said, “You’re the one who was named after a car. It’s Mercedes, right?”
A woman I used to know about 5-6 years ago, named her daughter “Noodle.”
I barely managed to stifle a laugh when she told me that would be the poor child’s name. Then, several months later, she was relating to me something that the child had done, and I had forgotten all about the name thing by that point, and almost said “that’s a really impressive feat for a dog.” Thankfully, I managed to stop myself in time.
My job also involves signing up new moms and their babies for various programs at a hospital. I hear the crazirst names. The spelling gets me even more.
I am not allowed to ask the question, “What were you thinking?” when I sign these women up. It’s probably best that I dpn’t know the answer to that – I night drink the grape Koolade.
When I hear about names like that, I go to my mom and thank her profusely for giving me and my brother nice, normal, not terribly popular (well, David is pretty popular, but it’s not trendy) names. Oh my yes. I like my name!
What’s more, my dad’s name was Martin. My brother and I have agreed that whoever spawns a boy first (assuming either of us reproduces or otherwise acquires a boy that needs a name) gets dibs on the name if they want it. Another generation with a nice, quiet, unexciting name.
It really sucks that he won’t be there to see said kid, though.
