Ok, I know there are a lot of people out there who like the Quizno’s “spong monkeys”. But I gotta say, they totally skeeve me out. I mean, listening to their grating voices and looking at a stiff, dead rat/hamster-like thing with nasty teeth…blech! Road kill does not make me want a Quizno’s sub.
And about the UPS “What can Brown do for you?” campaign… wasn’t heroin at one time referred to as “brown”? (Or maybe it still is. It’s not my bag, baby!)
That would certainly put things in a whole new light
How about a brilliant commercial that also sucked.
Anyone remember the “Your Cheating Heart” ad? This guy from Coke or Pepsi, I can’t remember which, is stocking the shelves in a convenience store, and Hank Williams Sr’s “Your Cheating Heart” is playing. He looks around to see if anyone is watching, then snags a bottle of the competitor’s product and drinks it.
I still remember that one. It was brilliant.
Know why it sucked?
Cause I don’t know anyone who remembers which product it was advertising!
My personal favorite was for Mr Clean, back about 5 or so years ago. The floor of this woman’s kitchen was so super-duper sparkly shiny she just couldn’t f-ing believe it. With an evangelical gleam in her eye, she looks up at the camera and says,
“Is it wet, or is it dry?” and the announcer voice says,
“No, it’s dry!”
I only saw that one a few times before they fixed his reply. Ah, the wonders of a third grade education.
The Japanese navy created a TV ad in February to encourage enlistments and public support for its mission of sending security troops to Iraq. In the spot, according to a Reuters reporter, seven actors dressed, Village People-like, as sailors dancing on the deck of a ship, singing (roughly translated), “Nippon Seaman Ship, Seaman Shipo, For Love … For Peace” and “I Love Japan, I Love Peace, The Maritime Self-Defense Force.” (The ad is needed, said a senior officer, because “there are a lot of young people and women who don’t seem interested (in the navy).”) [Reuters, 2-26-04]
I too hate the UPS commercials. I despise it when a company tries to create themselves a “trendy” sounding nickname (for example–“Sunny D”). And my Dad always referred to a butthole as a “round brown.” I can’t help but think “butthole” every time the ad plays!
Does anyone else remember the ads for Doxidan (a laxative)? There’s a bunch of people (who are supposedly a group of musicians on tour) on the bus, playing a guitar and singing a ballad about Doxidan (Doxidan, Doxidan, get overnight relief with Doxidan, as sure as the sun rises."). All I have to say about that is…YUU–UCK!!
There was some car commerical- don’t remember which one- in which the car was being driven around in Irish/English countryside, over a dirt road, then into a castle, as red-headed children danced around and threw flowers or something. All the while, lilting flute music played in the background.
It was pretty much a dud as a commerical- boring and pointless, like many ‘arty’ car commericals- until I realized that the tune the flute was playing was the flute line to “Thick as a Brick” by Jethro Tull. At that point, I couldn’t figure out whether the commercial was being ironic, or if the ad agency had no idea that they were subtly insulting their clientele/cars.
1992 Republican National Convention, theme was “Family Values”, theme song from La Cage Aux Folles. :eek:
I heard an interview w/ John Mellencamp once, he said the GOP had called him up asking to use “Little Pink Houses” as their theme for that year. He asked if the fellow on the other end of the line had ever listened to the whole song. No, the GOPster admitted, he hadn’t. John said it was fine with him, but maybe they ought to give it a listen and call him back. They did – thanks, but no thanks.
Oh, man, I just remembered one that I had to post. I remember a time that Tampax was touted as being sold “in decorator boxes.” I assume this was so that they would not clash with your living room decor when you displayed them on your coffee table. :rolleyes:
The GOP’s campaign people apparently didn’t learn their lesson. During the 2000 presidential campaign, “American Woman” by the Guess Who was used as Laura Bush’s “theme song.” First, the Guess Who are a canadian band. Second, the lyrics to the song are scathingly critical of the U.S.:
“American Woman /
Stay away from me /
American Woman /
Mama, let me be /
I don’t need your ghetto scenes /
I don’t need your war machines /
Your sparkling lights will hypnotize /
Go spark in someone else’s eyes…”
Probably not the image the GOP meant to convey about their candidate for first lady.
I was going through some old-ass papers and found a brochure from MIT hyping their financial aid program. They had testimonials from poor (by Ivy League standards) talking about how unaffordable school would have been otherwise. THe brochure’s main pont was that the school is completely unaffordable to average folk unless you use their aid program. Reading things like “my family couldn’t even afford my MIT living expenses” and “it would have cost me 40k a year without finaincial aid” just emphasized how far out of my reach a private college would have been. I guess they were trying to persuade people considering the school more seriously, but they could have handled the brochure a lot better.
I just don’t understand the new Jeep commercial. In case you haven’t seen it, a guy takes a car carrier to a kids car wash, has them wash all the cars, and then says “it’s $3 for trucks, right?” giving them $3 for the whole thing. Then, he goes on to complain that they missed a spot.
What are they trying to say, anyway? “Jeep: We’re assholes who take advantage of kids”? I just don’t get it.
Talking about fruity, I got a Spam ad. tonight for Viagra and other drugs which came with the subject line “My boss thinks you’re gay” … I dunno what moron thought that would be a good slogan for Viagra … even if I was gay, or a guy. [I’m neither!] What are they trying to imply here anyway - that gay guys are more insecure about the size of their ‘package’???
My most hated TV ads. at the moment are the incessant ones for homeowner loans - there are sometimes 2 or 3 different ones in each commercial break.
I also cringe at the new Pantene ad. which is all about ‘sleek’ hair - every time she says the word ‘sleek’ in that smarmy voice I feel like throwing something at her.
The talking toilets are also a daft idea - it would almost put you off sitting down - in case it started to talk and you inadvertantly got bitten on the bum. The day I hear my loo talking to me will be the day I book myself into the nearest nuthouse!
