Baker’s Dozen III

Overheard at Trump’s hush-money jury trial

  1. “I just don’t think his bronzer is flattering under these courtroom lights.”
  2. “Not so loud. You’ll wake him.”
  3. “If I say I can’t be impartial, would that get me off jury duty?”
  4. “Zzzz… hamburder… Zzzz… Sleepy Joe…”
  5. Hey, do you think one of these jurors could be a sleeper agent?
  6. “Please, God, let me be in the room when the judge finally holds him in contempt and his own Secret Service agents drag him off to a holding cell.”
  7. “I wouldn’t believe Trump if his tongue were notarized.”
  8. “Does Juror #95 look like Pauly Shore to you…?”