“Invading the Crimea might at least get people to stop talking about how crappy the Olympic Village was in Sochi.”
“Look, comrade, it was hard enough to find heterosexual figure skaters, now you want straight male ballet dancers at the Bolshoi???”
“I don’t understand. Every time I ask President Putin why we invaded Ukraine, he just says ‘Cherni Vodi’.”
“Check this out, if you add one letter to ‘Crimea’ it becomes an anagram for ‘America’. We’d better snatch it before they do!”
“He’s already oiling his chest for the Nobel Peace Prize swimsuit competition. I don’t have the heart to tell him. Or the balls.”
“Couldn’t we just find a grizzly bear for him to wrestle or something?”
“Sorry, I meant to invade Iceland, my bad.”
“I hate to cut you off, Barack, but my people just told me President Xi’s on the other line and I obviously have to take his call. I promise I’ll come you back afterwards.”
“Invading the Crimea might at least get people to stop talking about how crappy the Olympic Village was in Sochi.”
“Look, comrade, it was hard enough to find heterosexual figure skaters, now you want straight male ballet dancers at the Bolshoi???”
“I don’t understand. Every time I ask President Putin why we invaded Ukraine, he just says ‘Cherni Vodi’.”
“Check this out, if you add one letter to ‘Crimea’ it becomes an anagram for ‘America’. We’d better snatch it before they do!”
“He’s already oiling his chest for the Nobel Peace Prize swimsuit competition. I don’t have the heart to tell him. Or the balls.”
“Couldn’t we just find a grizzly bear for him to wrestle or something?”
“Sorry, I meant to invade Iceland, my bad.”
“I hate to cut you off, Barack, but my people just told me President Xi’s on the other line and I obviously have to take his call. I promise I’ll come you back afterwards.”
“If he starts pounding his shoe on the desk, get the dart gun.”
“Invading the Crimea might at least get people to stop talking about how crappy the Olympic Village was in Sochi.”
“Look, comrade, it was hard enough to find heterosexual figure skaters, now you want straight male ballet dancers at the Bolshoi???”
“I don’t understand. Every time I ask President Putin why we invaded Ukraine, he just says ‘Cherni Vodi’.”
“Check this out, if you add one letter to ‘Crimea’ it becomes an anagram for ‘America’. We’d better snatch it before they do!”
“He’s already oiling his chest for the Nobel Peace Prize swimsuit competition. I don’t have the heart to tell him. Or the balls.”
“Couldn’t we just find a grizzly bear for him to wrestle or something?”
“Sorry, I meant to invade Iceland, my bad.”
“I hate to cut you off, Barack, but my people just told me President Xi’s on the other line and I obviously have to take his call. I promise I’ll come you back afterwards.”
“If he starts pounding his shoe on the desk, get the dart gun.”
“Yakov Smirnoff has shown up in North Korea to negotiate with Dennis Rodman.”
“Invading the Crimea might at least get people to stop talking about how crappy the Olympic Village was in Sochi.”
“Look, comrade, it was hard enough to find heterosexual figure skaters, now you want straight male ballet dancers at the Bolshoi???”
“I don’t understand. Every time I ask President Putin why we invaded Ukraine, he just says ‘Cherni Vodi’.”
“Check this out, if you add one letter to ‘Crimea’ it becomes an anagram for ‘America’. We’d better snatch it before they do!”
“He’s already oiling his chest for the Nobel Peace Prize swimsuit competition. I don’t have the heart to tell him. Or the balls.”
“Couldn’t we just find a grizzly bear for him to wrestle or something?”
“Sorry, I meant to invade Iceland, my bad.”
“I hate to cut you off, Barack, but my people just told me President Xi’s on the other line and I obviously have to take his call. I promise I’ll come you back afterwards.”
“If he starts pounding his shoe on the desk, get the dart gun.”
“Yakov Smirnoff has shown up in North Korea to negotiate with Dennis Rodman.”
“Will anybody be able to determine that we fired the air-to-air missile at MH370?”
“Invading the Crimea might at least get people to stop talking about how crappy the Olympic Village was in Sochi.”
“Look, comrade, it was hard enough to find heterosexual figure skaters, now you want straight male ballet dancers at the Bolshoi???”
“I don’t understand. Every time I ask President Putin why we invaded Ukraine, he just says ‘Cherni Vodi’.”
“Check this out, if you add one letter to ‘Crimea’ it becomes an anagram for ‘America’. We’d better snatch it before they do!”
“He’s already oiling his chest for the Nobel Peace Prize swimsuit competition. I don’t have the heart to tell him. Or the balls.”
“Couldn’t we just find a grizzly bear for him to wrestle or something?”
“Sorry, I meant to invade Iceland, my bad.”
“I hate to cut you off, Barack, but my people just told me President Xi’s on the other line and I obviously have to take his call. I promise I’ll call you back afterwards.”
“If he starts pounding his shoe on the desk, get the dart gun.”
“Yakov Smirnoff has shown up in North Korea to negotiate with Dennis Rodman.”
“Will anybody be able to determine that we fired the air-to-air missile at MH370?”
“I don’t know, I think ‘the Second Crimean War’ has a certain ring to it, don’t you?”
“Invading the Crimea might at least get people to stop talking about how crappy the Olympic Village was in Sochi.”
“Look, comrade, it was hard enough to find heterosexual figure skaters, now you want straight male ballet dancers at the Bolshoi???”
“I don’t understand. Every time I ask President Putin why we invaded Ukraine, he just says ‘Cherni Vodi’.”
“Check this out, if you add one letter to ‘Crimea’ it becomes an anagram for ‘America’. We’d better snatch it before they do!”
“He’s already oiling his chest for the Nobel Peace Prize swimsuit competition. I don’t have the heart to tell him. Or the balls.”
“Couldn’t we just find a grizzly bear for him to wrestle or something?”
“Sorry, I meant to invade Iceland, my bad.”
“I hate to cut you off, Barack, but my people just told me President Xi’s on the other line and I obviously have to take his call. I promise I’ll call you back afterwards.”
“If he starts pounding his shoe on the desk, get the dart gun.”
“Yakov Smirnoff has shown up in North Korea to negotiate with Dennis Rodman.”
“Will anybody be able to determine that we fired the air-to-air missile at MH370?”
“I don’t know, I think ‘the Second Crimean War’ has a certain ring to it, don’t you?”
