<Max Smart voice>
Wouldja believe 7 whiners, a sniveller and a grouch?
</Max Smart voice>
:: Looks at above batch of posts ::
:: Considers them ::
:: Looks at Lynn with a kinda guilt expression ::
<Max Smart voice>
Sorry about that, Chief!
</Max Smart voice>
I know you can get paranoid, but what exactly is the big deal this time? Tuba says 200-300, Anthracite says 2% or about 350. Ma says 500.
BFD.
There is an easy (not fast) way to tell though. Just the way Anthracite did. You can random sample. Anyone want to bet money on who’s closest to this useless datum?
Please do not do what I did. I did my survey at a time when the server was not having the problems it is now.
And I made no claim about 2%. I only reported what was in the very small sampling I made.
On a side note: Voodoo Queen Una predicts that soon, mon, more will be join’in the damned souls of the banned! I an’ I tells ya,
THE CARDS DO NOT LIE!
Really? How and where have I gotten paranoid?
Do you suspect that I have a reason to be paranoid?
Is it because you’re after me? You’re ALL after me?! Don’t think I’m not onto you.
(Kidding aside, I’m going to assume that you didn’t mean it the way it came out. If that’s the case, please say so. If you did mean it the way it came out, please, enlighten me further in the Pit.)
**
The “big deal” is that I don’t like “Appeals to Invisible Authority”. If Ma Parrot actually does have a secret list, let her post it in the next hour (don’t want her to compile it via searches). If she does, I’ll humbly beg her pardon (and conclude she’s kinda scary if she’s collecting a list of banned posters). If she doesn’t, I’ll conclude she’s pulling figures out of her ass and using her invisible list to back her board bashing up again.
Fenris
{P.S. Voodoo Queen Una: I stand in awe of your gifts! Can you tell me what lies in MY future?)
I ain’t Marie Laveau, but I can tell you where this thread is going.
your humble TubaDiva
Administrator
And why should we slow down the server to get a slightly more accurate number of banned people than we already have? It really ain’t that important.
There’s nothing wrong with the question in the OP. And we answered it the best we could. We don’t keep a list of banned people. They’re hardly worth the effort.
I have always wondered out of the 2%, 200-300, 500 or whatever BANNED accounts, what was more common; accounts with a greater number of posts (500+) or ones with fewer posts(-100)?
It would appear to me in my relatively short time here it be the latter. Though I could be wrong.
Maybe we should just ban everybody and start over.
hmmm…
: waiting for MuMu to chime in here anytime soon :
: looks at watch :
Don’t poke the bear:
So, after 4 posts, you come into this thread to back up Ma Parrot…
Score!!
Anecdotally speaking, it appears that the large majority of banned members have less than 250 posts. Satan is the banned member with the most posts (5000+).
The typical 10-step pattern seems to be:
-
Come on the Board as a newbie, and don’t read the rules.
-
Post threads in the wrong Forums - repeatedly, and ignore the Mods when they tell you not to do that. Alternately, post threads of topics that have been already covered by 1e+28 other threads. Bristle with offence when people suggest that you use the search engine. Or, post threads on taboo topics - “How can I make crack in my kitchen sink?”, for example.
-
Scream to high heaven for justice in another thread when your threads are closed by the Mods. This thread will soon be closed as well.
-
Get angry, and start attacking the Mods and fellow posters in semi-random, unrelated threads.
-
Most likely, you have received official contact by now from the SDMB staff, and have chosen to either ignore it, or to fight via e-mail.
-
Start a Pit thread (or have one started about you), wherein you meltdown. This thread will last about 5 pages or so.
-
Bring up the “Mod” conspiracy. State that the Mods are somehow violating your “civil rights”, and that you are just a “Net freedom fighter”, raging agains the machine.
-
Start attacking prominent posters that support the Board as “tools of the machine”.
-
Eventually, you will call someone the wrong name, make a threat, or devolve into pure insanity. Try using the “N” word - it seems to get people banned faster than anything else.
-
Congratulations! You are now banned.
And, in addition to Anth’s list:
- Register just to bitch about how bad the board/mods are
- Only post once every few months, usually after bannings and only to whine about how bad the board/mods are (or to explain how many thousands of trolls are still here under false names).
Repeat as needed.
This is a much slower way to get banned. 24KaratGoldie (or whatever th’ hell her name was) was around seemingly forever before she was finally tossed via this method
Fenris
Personally, I hope no one tells people the best way to Fight the Power at this Board. There is one technique that is guaranteed to make the Admins and Mods bow before you, naked and in chains, and acknowledge your superiority.
Passive resistance. Learn it from Ghandi.
Just stop posting. Totally. Completely. Absolutely.
It might take days. It might take weeks. It might take years. But be strong, my oppressed sisters and brothers, for one day in the far distant future, Tuba will wake up screaming in the middle of the night in her apartment on Moon Colony Scorpio, shouting out “Oh my GOD! AssClown hasn’t posted for 37 years!” And while tears cloud her vision, she will post a long apology thread to you, begging your forgiveness.
Just remember - be gracious when you accept her apology. 
Heh. Pure quality there, Anthracite (and Fenris).
You made me grin and chortle, which is as close to laughing out loud as a dull humourless type like me usually gets.
Wait, isn’t this what handy is doing?
Another that works sometimes is if you’re a leggy redhead, wear a leather vest and cut-off jeans and wrestle me to…
Oh wait, was that in my out-loud voice? Never mind.
Astroboy furiously scribbles notes from Anthracite’s and Fenris’s post…
Hey, if I play my cards right, I could be banned by tomorrow!!
N! N!! N, I tells ya! :eek:
replying to e-mail from the SDMB staff
“Yes, I said ‘N’…”
“Yes, I said ‘N’, and I stick by it!”
“Yes, I said ‘N’, and I meant it!”
“No, I will not appologize for saying ‘N’!”
“Why will I not appologize? It’s a matter of principle! If I say sorry for saying ‘N’ then next I’m going to have to say sorry for saying ‘Q’!”
“Oh, yeah? Well, bite me!”
"What? I got banned? WHAT FOR?? Qu’est la fuck (as they say in France)?
Seriously, though… I have seen several posters banned that I really enjoyed reading, and was very sad to see go. (Satan, inor, peace, Silo, others) However, whatever issues I have regarding said banning are based upon insufficient data, IE: I don’t know what happened via e-mail, or even in other threads regarding the poster’s behavior (current or past) in totality… I don’t have the time to read EVERY thread that a banned poster has ever posted to; I have 2 jobs, a fiancee, and other things that subtract from my time here…
So, when I see a poster banned, I usually look at the thread(s) in question (if I have time, which I USUALLY, but not always, do…) to see if I can find out why. In every case so far, the poster has behaved badly, been warned REPEATEDLY by the mods, admins, AND other dopers to cool it, and has failed to do so! In other words, they had the opportunity to appologize/change their behavior, and didn’t take it (Why? I dunno…pride? Egotism? Other reasons?)…
Look, this message board is unique. Let me repeat: unique.
I’m glad I was directed here by MrO lo, these many months ago… (And I think those of you who have been here longer than me will remember what a sad and lonely place this was before I came!:))
This place is unique for many reasons, and some of them have to do with the ground rules: #1: DON’T BE A JERK! This allows us to discuss things, debate, and argue WITHIN boundaries…
We can call each other names, throw things at each other, question each other’s opinions, attitudes, predjudices, and beliefs, and LEARN from one another here, as long as we do so in a civilized manner (fuckhead!).
If we go outside the rules, we are asked (NB: by thankless, unpaid, talented people!) to change our behavior while posting here… if we do not, we are prohibited from any further bad behavior. It’s as simple as that.
If I fall down a flight of stairs and break my wrist, I do not take Newton or Einstein to court… I violated the rules, and suffered the consequences! Such is life!
Fortunately we, here in this message board, have a little more control over what happens to ourselves than we do when we lose our footing on a flight of stairs.
And let’s not forget: when someone gets banned, it’s not the end of the world! Though I may miss the input of that doper here, on this website, they are not banished to some cold, inhospitable, cut-off-from-communication alternate reality! They just can’t post HERE anymore. You can still e-mail that person, maybe hook up with them on another message board, call them or meet them IRL, etc…
Sorry, this was long and rambling… but it’s been kinda bugging me!:
( I’m tired of seeing all these “I hate (Mod name) because (poster name) was banned!” threads… no offense to anyone, I hope…
Just a small clarification here. For the record the “N-Word”, may be either Nigger, or Nazi. Or both; we’ll give you the option.
Apparently, you forgot to add the hidden part pertaining to this rule, which dictates the above, need only have strict application to the “members” of this board.
What I’ve gathered from casual observation over the past few months (of lurking here) is not a universal bound set this rule (as it would imply). But rather, a non-universal one.
—This is my opinion and you are free to criticize it. Just bare in mind that it is not going to change my opinion. Chao.
you’re right Living Dead Guy, and it’s an important point!
ONLY MEMBERS OF THE SDMB MUST ADHERE TO SDMB RULES.
Much like I do not have to follow the rules of the Hello Kitty Message Board, as I am not a member there. Interestingly, it didn’t take me months of lurking there to figure that out.
jarbaby