One of the things that my church does with my tithe is operate several outreach services (food bank, shelter, etc). I also donate clothing to Goodwill and Salvation Army. I choose to give to organizations that will help people down on their luck, rather than give directly to people who might just go buy a bottle. If they are serious about wanting help I give to the places where they can get it.
I’ll buy “Street News” if they’re selling, becuase they are actually trying to work and provide a service.
Last week I was passing by one of those Help the Homeless kiosks. Keep in mind, I’ve had to take on two freelance jobs because my rent is going up $100/month. The woman in the kiosk yelled, “Your spare change means a hot meal for someone tonight!” Without even thinking, I snapped, “Yeah—me!” as I walked by her. Just a gut reaction, so to speak.
I once spent seven long months in a Salvation Army shelter. I know some of the others would panhandle. Did I? No way, I can’t ask just anyone for money. I also like to think I’m too proud to beg. I did get some Government assistance, plus a little extra money as a day laborer. I have needed to ask for money at times; for example, I was on my way home from work once and found I was a bit short for bus fare.
Don’t take it for granted that someone is after money to get their alcohol/nicotine/whatever fix. They might be just trying to get home like I was.
I don’t have a problem giving a little something if the person is trying to earn it–even the guy singing tunelessly while playing the old three-string guitar that he found in the trash somewhere is trying to earn a little by entertaining passerby. And I can’t forget the guy who offered “Jokes for Tips.” His jokes were genuinely funny, and I was glad to give him something.
The ones who sell copies of their newspaper are making an effort too. I’ll usually buy a copy.
That said, there have been many times when I’ve been too tapped to give anything. If asked, I usually say, “Sorry, pal, but I’m broke right now.” Most of the time, I get something like, “That’s OK. Take care.” But there have been a few times when the response has not been so civil.
I’ve always thought an ex-SO of mine had the best idea. He spent some time in Boston when he was going to school, and he kept a supply of subway tokens and some little cards in his pocket with the addresses of places that homeless people could go to get food and medical help. If someone approached him, they got a token and a card. The rest was up to them.
Thank you for all of you interesting and varied responses. I really often do wonder what the best answer is. There will always be poor people, I suppose, and as I said in my original OP, I am grateful every day that I am not one of them (yet!). I have more than they; I therefore feel that it is demanded of me by my ethics and by my faith to help them out and spread things around a bit.
For myself, I will continue to give out spare change to the people who ask. I don’t care what they spend it on. It’s a gift, no strings attached. In my opinion, I am in no position to tell them what to do with the money I give them. Life is full of choices, and they a right to make theirs. My choice is what I believe to be compassion.
Thanks!
Creaky
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Why? Asking someone for money in exchange for nothing is very rude.
Marc