OK, that next post:
AFAIAC, it’s not too complicated. Jesus distilled the Law and the Prophets down to two simple commandments: to love the Lord your God with all your heart and soul and mind and strength, and to love your neighbor as yourself.
In both of these commandments, the command is to love.
One big, important thing we do with people we love is, we listen to them. We don’t dismiss them out of hand. Sure, if they tell us fantastical things about themselves, we’re going to question their veracity, but by and large, we listen to those we love, and we give them the benefit of the doubt when they tell us their stories, when they reveal to us who they are. If it turns out later that their stories don’t make sense, we take that into account in our later conversations with them.
We’ve had plenty of time to hear plenty of stories from gay men and women. Some of them are people we know well personally, some of them are people we know in or through fora like this, and we hear the stories in various media of many others that we have no personal connection to.
And it’s pretty consistent: this is who they are. Just like my crushes on girls go all the way back to kindergarten, friends of mine who are attracted to persons of the same sex had that attraction going way back into their childhoods.
So how would God love them? What would God want for them? The obvious answer is, God would want the same things for them as he wants for straight people like me. And that would include fulfilling romantic and sexual relationships for those that want them, IOW the vast majority of them. Which would necessarily be same-sex relationships for those that are not sexually attracted to the opposite sex.
Now many evangelicals weasel around this by equating a same-sex orientation with a call to celibacy. I’m gonna call bullshit on that, for a few reasons.
First, it’s presumptuous as hell to say that you know what someone else’s calling from God might be, when they don’t know it themselves. Second, callings in both the Bible and in my own personal experience tend to be individual things. We who love the Lord are all called to love our neighbors as ourselves, but since it’s a calling we all share, it’s right there in the Bible, one of the two Great Commandments. The rest of them tend to be directed at individuals. Third, there’s no indication that the persons allegedly called in this manner are sensing from the Lord a calling to celibacy.
In short, the whole thing just reeks of bullshit concocted to square a belief that same-sex relationships are un-Christian with the reality that same-sex attraction has proven to be pretty much immutable.
And immutable is what they’ve proven to be. Forty-eight years ago this month, I had one of those transformative religious experiences known as being ‘born again,’ and believe me, no lesser term could have captured it, the changes were so sweeping. It’s powerful stuff, enabling a person to shed every way that they’ve been crippled and corroded inside, the way a snake sheds an old skin, and to walk out of all that into a new and free life.
And yet this incredibly potent life-changing experience has been proven ineffective against same-sex attraction, in the lives of so many gay Christians who really bought into the notion that same-sex attraction was wrong and this would ‘cure’ them. I can only conclude from that consistent failure that same-sex attraction isn’t a wrongness, it isn’t a crippling or a corroding, it isn’t sin. It’s not something that the Lord is asking the new Christian to leave behind.
And believe you me, if being born again didn’t make same-sex attraction go away, some silly gay conversion therapy bullshit doesn’t have a prayer of touching it.
There’s no remedy for it even in Christ, because it isn’t something that even a Christian needs a remedy for. If you’re attracted to persons of the same sex, that’s who you are, and God loves you that way, just the way he loves me as a straight person.
God loves you. God’s not expecting you to be someone you’re not, in order to be worthy of his love. (None of us are worthy, but that’s another story. I love the Firebug, not because he’s worthy, but because he’s my son and I love him. Similarly, worthiness has jack shit to do with God’s love for us. He just does.) If you’re gay, God wants you to have a joyful, fulfilled life as a gay person. That would include marriage, if marriage is something you want. It’s that simple.