Nothing’s topped the nickname of the Viking raider Ivar Ragnarsson in my opinion. I mean, Ivar the Boneless? That guy had style.
Was he friends with Radnar Hairytrousers? (yes it’s real)
Son of, actually. Ivar the Boneless was the fourth son of Ragnar Lodbrok, or “Hairy Breeches”.
It’s kind of disappointing that the Scandinavian conquests didn’t last. We all could have had names like that.
It was much more likely that someone may have called Charles the Fat by his nickname to his face, than Edward the Martyr.
Consider the first qualification of becoming a martyr. Especially back then. 
His sons included “William Rufus” (the red), Robert Curthose (which literally means “Bob Shortpants”) and Henry Beauclerc (which means “beautiful scholar”, which basically meant he could write his name and read a little).
Yes and it’s an amusing name considering he’s Charlemagne’s father.
“Penis of Power?” “Ulick Burke?” Forget the She-Ra joke, I think we’ve discovered the historical Dick Assman.
That’s what we call “successful branding.”
At least he got a yellow, effeminate cartoon character named after him.
And Charlemagne’s mother was Bertha Big-Foot!
Another amusing name: Heinrich Jasomirgott (“So help me God…”). Discuss.
Magnus Magnusson translates the name as “Hairbreeks” (or was that the original), meaning “hairpants” after his supposedly fireproof pants.
The geneological sections of the Icelandic sagas are fine sources for evocative names.
In Njal’s Saga, one hears of Grim Hairycheek, grandson of Hallbjorn Halftroll of Ravensfood. (Unfortunately, one doesn’t hear enough.)
There’s also Henry the Impotent of Castile. Poor guy.
I came across a reference to a medieval court entertainer called “Roland the Farter” in a theater history book once. Unfortunately, most of the details of his performances seem to be lost to history.
Arthur: I am Arthur, King of the Britons, and I bear the magic sword Excalibre, against which no armor can stand!
Siegfried: I am Siegfried, chosen of Wotan, and I have the golden ring Nibelung, forged by the mad dwarf Alberich!
Magnus: I am Magnus Magnusson, and my pants don’t catch fire!
Arthur & Siegfried: Shut the fuck up, Magnus.
The really sad part is the poor quality of our modern nicknames for our leaders. C’mon. Shrub and Slick Willie? It’s pathetic. That’s one of the big reasons why I was sorry Bush won. Say what you like about his politics, “President Gore” sounds pretty intimidating.
William the Potent?
Say what you will, but nobody fucks with a guy called magnus and live to tell about it.
BTW, I have to think that “the Axe” is a damn sweet thing to be known as.
I was going to bring up old Ivar, but I thought he rather spoiled the fun because his nickname is believed to be based on a genetic disorder: partial osteogenesis imperfecta. Apparently, he had cartilage rather than bones in his legs, and had to be carried into battle on a shield. Seems he was a tactician rather than a warrior.
Re: Bill Clinton: How about William the Cigar Abuser? Doctor StrangeSmoke? Or, dare I say it, Wet Willie? (And I LIKED the guy, mind you.)
True. And you’d be hard-pressed to stick an intimidating nickname to G.W. Bush anyway.
Does this remind anyone else of Blackadder? I particularly like William the Bastard.
Tell that the Saddam Hussein, or either of his sons if you can find enough of them left to make a whole head.
Even more humilitating: his “daughter” was popularly known as Juana La Beltraneja, “Beltran’s girl”. Beltran was Henry’s buddy. Ouch.
Wilfred Pilosus, known as “the hairy” because “…he was hairy in places not normally so in men…” (Gesta comitum barcinonensium)
How about most inappropriate names? The wrongly-named Pope Innocent VIII had two illegitimate children.
Really enjoying this thread. 
I thought some one would beat me to it but the French, who never really got the hang of intimidating nicknames, also had a Charles the Bald that’s right folks I haven’t mixed my vowels - bald not bold. Maybe they’re just unforgiving of those who don’t conform to conventional ideas of beauty and height.