“Don’t brace yourself against the impact. It will only hurt more.”
A doctor told me that the worse thing a person can do if they see they are heading for a collison is to brace themselves against the steering wheel – which is exactly what I had done in an accident and why my chest was hurting like a gorilla had jumped on me.
A few months later, a friend said the same thing, but meant it metaphorically when I was getting all angsty about my life.
My English teacher in high school told us, “Don’t waste your time memorising anything that you can look up in a book.” With modern technology it has become even smarter advice.
My first wife and I were told by one of the cleaners at work, “Never go to sleep angry with each other. Stay up and sort it out.”
The best advice I ever recieved has long left my memory…but…
I did sign up for a guest membership just to write this (hence, mad hatter…darn you alice…j/k)…While in a class for observation about 2 weeks ago, I was enjoying my last day. Students were giving presentations, and it was nice to just sit and listen and not do a lot.
When I got up to leave, the teacher and I were talking and he explained to me that he would be retiring when I would be (supposedly) graduating, and I told him I’m so fed up I thought about just changing my major and not worrying about it. He said for me to remember that “it isn’t about destinations” (ie. graduation=destination and it=my life") then when I left he told me to “remember to just enjoy the journey”…it made me feel a lot better about everything…I doubt it’s cosmic, but I loved the idea…
Mad Hatter
Huh. I think this is one of the most profound things I’ve ever read.
+3
Maybe, but I’ve heard that if a doctor asks you about your vices (drinking, smoking etc), he or she will automatically double your answer.
Nevermind the ‘+3’. Keyboard brainfart.
From my father: Never volunteer information.
“Don’t be a jerk.” 
From my 8th grade history teacher:
“Take initiative. Assume responsibility.”
From my boss:
“We don’t have a lack of work. We have a lack of commitment.”
From a line in a book I read twenty-something years ago.
“Do not worry about choosing your path. Your path chooses you, and in the end, you will say Thank you.”
I thought it was new age bullshit back then, and I still don’t think it applies to everybody, but hoo-boy, did that wind up describing my life!
[QUOTE=don’t ask]
My English teacher in high school told us, “Don’t waste your time memorising anything that you can look up in a book.”
[QUOTE]
Similar one from my dad, “Never memorize information. Learn how to look it up.”
That piece of advice has helped me imensley. I might not know the order of the fields of a TCP/IP header, but I know where I can find them. I know how to use a library for research, how to use an index, table of contents, and reference sections of books to find stuff. I also like to think my skills at searching the internet is pretty good. That is stuff you should memorize how to do. If you know that then you can look up just about anything else.
Another quote I live by is “You can’t change the past.”
This one has gotten me into trouble because people think I should react more about something that has happened than saying “Oh well.” Instead of crying over it I will look into how to prevent it from happening again. Once I have prevented it from happening again I don’t worry about it anymore. I think I lead a less stressful life because of it.
-Otanx
Everything that happens to you in your life is useful, if you know how to file it away and pull it out when you can use it.–Jean Nidetch, founder of Weight Watchers in her autobio
One of my first employers told me if I have nothing to do at work, grab a broom. Even if your just leaning on it you look like your doing something. This has served me well over the years.
“Don’t try to sit on one asscheeck to spare your episiotomy. Sit flat on your ass and cuddle that baby!” - Childbirth recovery advice from a nun. Great woman.
A very good friend who has been gone for 9 years now, gave me this advice:
“Never charge a cop”
It hasn’t helped me the way it did him (I am generally law-abiding), but it has gotten me out of a few speeding tickets.
One saying that I find very useful is “it is easier to get forgiveness than permission”.
One of my university teachers, now deceased: “Don’t be mainly a critic.”
“Una, you’ve been dirt poor all your life. Right now you’re living in student housing and paying about $400 a month for everything including rent. Before you start your first professional job, tell them to put the maximum amount into your 401k allowed by law, and never change it downwards. If it hits before the first paycheck, you’ll just budget around it, and never notice the money missing. And you’ll be so much better off in the long run.”
And it was true.
From my grandmother: “Never get married. Never have children.”
I have followed her advice to the letter.
This is a good one, and something that has served me very well, too.
Probably the first little piece of useful advice I learned?
“Fuck 'em if they can’t take a joke.”
This one’s kept me going for a long, long time.