Better to make major changes all at once, or incrimentally?

In My Humble Opinion
1

So I have a few bad habits I want to break. Chain-smoking, poor sleep habits, not exercising, and so on. I want to regain my old discipline, both of mind and body, if only for my happiness and general functionality in life.

With that in mind, is it generally better to make major changes to your daily habits incrementally, or balls-to-the-wall all at once? The latter seems easier, if only because it’ll suck more, but for much less time. However, with that way, I set myself up for failure big-time, which is why the former baby-steps method seems just as appealing: it seems to me that it’d be easier to figuratively ‘get back on the horse’ if I slip up.

Experiences and insights to share, O ye fellow Dopers?

2

From a purely personal stand point, doing a small bit at a time is the way to go.

Back when I hit 347 lbs, it shocked me enough to make me look at my life and see what had to change. When I figured it out, I tried to go whole hog so that I could get it done and over with. I changed just about everything about my life. I cut out tv, internet, video games, junk food, soda, and started exercising three hours a day. This lasted about a week. I’d stick to it for a couple of weeks, get tired of denying myself all of my old favorite things, and fall back on odd habits.

It wasn’t until I started focusing on changing just one thing at a time that I had any success. For example, switching from whole milk to 2% milk. Once it got to be a habit to grab the purple lidded milk, I then started leaving cheese off burgers. When that became habit, I started choosing one place to walk to each day instead of taking the car.

By doing things this way, taking it one step at a time, I managed to drop 67 lbs, and keep it off. The former way, I didn’t stick with anything for more than a couple of weeks. The latter way, I’ve been doing it for over a year now, and still making gradual changes that actually stick.

The only time I’ve been able to do something cold turkey was when I broke my morphine addiction, and that was forced on me.

3

Incremental, but steady. When you make a plan, you want to be able to live up to it 100% of the time. This sets you up for future success. However, you have to feel like they are meaningful changes, so make incremental adjustments at a constant, steady rate–and be planning your next adjustment all the time.

Also, try to be enthusiastic. This new life you have planed will be better than the one you have now, right? Try to focus on that. Resignation is a hard place to start from.

4

I agree that it should be incremental rather than revolutionary. However, that can never be used as an excuse to slack. What you want to see is some success right away and work from there. You won’t be able to wake up tomorrow and run three miles a day three times a week. What you can do is pick something that you know you will succeed at and work from there even if it is just a walk around the block at first.

The other important thing that is the reason almost all fad diets fail is that whatever you choose has to be sustainable. It won’t do you any good to lose ten pounds if you gain it back in 3 months and it will make you feel like a failure. Look at everything you are accustomed to doing and ask yourself if you really need it every time it comes up. Replace soda with water over time and jump at every opportunity to get some exercise. Cigarettes are an addiction so that one is harder but you can ration and then go to nicotine patches and then quit. Don’t let one failure set you back either. A cruel trick of nature is that exercise is terrible when you are out of shape. It gets easier and more fun the more you do it.

5

I agree with the previous responses. For years I would make huge plans with comprehensive lists of things I was going to do, get all excited about them, and then give up after a few weeks when things got tough.

I only started to make real changes when I learned to change one thing at a time, wait for it to take hold, and them move on to another thing. A good rule of thumb is that it takes about 21 days (3 weeks) to form a habit. Try making only one small change, but really sticking with it for 21 days, and then if it has started to take hold as a habit, moving on to the next thing.

I sympathize with the poor sleep habits, that’s one I’m currently working on.

6

I’d say incremental change, and from these examples, start a daily exercise. That might help the sleep problem, which would be a 2for1 bonus. An exercise buddy makes walking or going to the gym much easier, IMHO.
I wish you best of luck on finding your old (good) habits again!

7

I think if you try to change everything at once, it will be probably be too difficult, you’ll get discouraged and say “screw this” and then the entire self improvement plan goes out the window. At least it’s that way for me. Especially if your trying to quit smoking on top of everything else. It will take all of your energy and will power to stay tobacco free, at least for the first couple weeks.

8

I mean this with love and affection, not snarkiness: there are people who talk about making the changes and there are people who make the changes. That’s all.

9

I’d go with the incremental change, too. Also, get help. Tell your friends and family what you’re doing so you have some accountability and support. Involve them if possible.

10

I dunno. if you combined exercise with quitting smoking, wouldn’t you feel the benefits of both much quicker and be less likely to give up? I’d think the exercise would provide a good distraction from the nicotine cravings.

11

They will probably feed off each other. How about something like this:
Step 1 Dont smoke while exercising or for 30 mins after. Walk at least 30 mins a day
Step 2 Add weights 3x a week and increase post exercise smoke free time to 60 mins
Step 3 Count how much you’re smoking and reduce it by 10% a week. Increase the intensity ofnyour exercise.

Etc.

Make a plan with small incremental steps but you don’t necessarily need to stick to one category at a time. Figure out if exercise makes you sleepy or wakes you up and schedule it at the most appropriate time to help your sleep patterns.

12

As far as the smoking thing goes, I wholeheartedly recommend Chantix. I’d been smoking for a total of 14 years until I was able to go cold turkey two weeks ago using it.

No cravings at all; the only thing I have to be careful about is not asking somebody for one after a couple of beers, since apparently cigarettes are practically a condiment for beer for me.

13

One quit-smoking suggestion I saw was to figure out what you are currently spending on cigarettes per day. (This would be “X.”) Get a big, clear jar and put it someplace prominent. At the end of each day, put “X” minus “whatever you actually spent on smokes” into the jar. For some people, the satisfaction of watching the money start piling up can provide an incentive.

And yes, count me as another voice saying “incremental and sustainable” works better. OP, you have to wrap your mind around the concept that this isn’t a temporary thing (i.e. your comment about how “it’ll suck more, but for much less time.”) This is a change in your lifestyle. To do any good, the change has to be permanent.

Another example of incremental change: a while back I wanted to make my abs stronger. I picked the only non-moving target in my daily routine I could think of … when I lay down, right before going to sleep. I did 2 piddly little crunches, then went to sleep. The next day, I did 4. Still no biggie - I’d picked an underachieving start point. The next day I did 6. Before I knew it, 50 crunches - unthinkable before - was no big deal. (Note: I’m not saying that right before going to sleep is the best time to exercise, esp. if you have sleep problems.)

Anyway, slow and steady wins the race and all that. Small, sustainable steps will work better in the long term than a big blowout. Good luck - we’re rooting for you! :slight_smile:

14

Tricky.

There is lots of research that shows that people do better following a regime like Mr. Accident suggest particularly with dietary and exercise changes. However when it comes to giving up smoking, gradual techniques are far less successful than just quitting.

15

I went all at once. Not every change will stick but enough did to make a major change in my life. And then the remainders were easier to pick off one at a time.

16

Incremental. I’m no expert, but this is what has worked for me in the past.

If you want to “diet* and exercise” then I suggest not starting both simultaneously. Pick one and start that.

As with any big changes, start with some moderation. Don’t expect wholesale perfection right out of the gate. Then work your way up in frequency and intensity.

So, should you work on exercising or eating habits first?

I suggest starting with a moderate exercise program first. Why start with exercise? If you start exercising and get in the habit of it, you will start to feel good about yourself. You will feel better physically and mentally. You will have achieved something which gives you confidence to achieve even more.

Start slow, a few days a week, then build up the frequency and intensity of the workouts. By starting only a few days a week, if you miss a day here or there, you won’t write off exercise as a failure and quit. Start with a commitment to exercise 3 days per week. After a few weeks, add a 4th day, then 5, etc.

After a few weeks of exercise, you will start noticing that you are getting into better shape because your muscles feel better and you are more alert. Then you will hopefully come to realize that eating like crap and smoking is really holding you back on your fitness goals.

You will see that you are exercising regularly, but all that work you put into exercise is going to waste in large part because you are eating garbage food. Why are you pouring all that time and energy into exercise when your eating habits undermine all your exercise work? Here you are, exercising 4 times a week but all that junk food is preventing you from really making the most of your efforts. You will start to see that every time you exercise, instead of losing weight, all you are doing is trying to burn off all the crap you ate earlier in the day. You will realize that all your workout efforts are wasted, in large part, as long as you keep eating garbage. That realization will motivate you to start eating better.

Start with little things like refusing to eat the chips that come with your sandwich. Pick a healthier sandwich than the one you normally get. If you go to McDonald’s, get a grilled chicken sandwich instead of a Big Mac. Switch the late night snack or dessert to cottage cheese or a bowl of cereal. Stop eating dessert. Stop late night snacking. Control your portion sizes. Cut out fried foods. Make incremental change.

Start eating better a few times a week, then work your way up to eating better all the time. You have breakfast, lunch, and dinner 3 times per day, 7 days per week. That’s 21 meals per week. Start eating better as much as you can, but don’t expect to eat perfectly healthy food 21 times per week right away. Count how many crap meals you eat in a week then work on reducing that number each week.

When you start eating better, maybe you eat junk food 14 times per week. After a few weeks, perhaps you will eat junk food maybe only 7 times per week. Eventually, you get down to eating junk food maybe only 2 or 3 times per week. Eventually, maybe you limit yourself to eating junk food only once per weekend. When I was in my best shape, I allowed myself one meal per week, on a weekend only, when I could go hog wild and eat whatever the hell I wanted. This kept me from going crazy.

By starting exercise first, you will also hopefully come to realize that your ability to exercise is limited by the fact that you are smoking. I never smoked so I don’t know how it works. However, I would hope that, through exercise, you will start to see that your lung capacity is holding you back. Your muscles will tell you to keep going, but your lungs will want to quit. This will motivate you to stop smoking.

So, this is my domino theory, and it all starts with exercise.

*Change your long term eating habits

17

On my domino theory, I said start exercise first because exercise will make you realize how the other crap limits your exercise. That will motivate you to change all the other crap in your life.

Conversely, if you start with dieting instead of exercise, I don’t see how successfully improving your eating habits serves as motivation to start exercising. Similarly, if you successfully stop smoking first, I don’t see how that encourages you to eat better or exercise.

That’s why I say start with exercise. Then you will get pissed off at yourself that you are exercising but failing to get the most out of all that work you put into it due to the eating and smoking. This will motivate you to eliminate that other crap.

18

^I dunno. If i couldn’t exercise well, that would be a reason for me to just stop. To motivate me, I’d need to see quick improvement at first.

I do know giving up smoking and overeating at once is really hard. I think they both stimulate dopamine receptors. And both cause an initial decrease of energy, so that’d make it much harder to excercise. I think those three would work best by themselves. Pick the easiest first (for the reason above).