I know this question is now pointless because most MickeyDees archways have the vague ‘billions served’ instead of the ‘99 billion served’ declarations of the past. However, WHAT was served?
I don’t think it’s people because I’ve been there multiple times and I dont’ think they keep track…
Therefore, ‘billions’ must be a function of orders. However, does this mean items? meals? or was this counted as per payment?
Things you wonder while procrastinating…
Kangaroos?
Yer pal,
Satan
*TIME ELAPSED SINCE I QUIT SMOKING:
Six months, one week, two days, 2 hours, 52 minutes and 20 seconds.
7684 cigarettes not smoked, saving $960.60.
Extra time with Drain Bead: 3 weeks, 5 days, 16 hours, 20 minutes.
I slept with a moderator!*
It’s hamburger patties. I forget where I heard this, but I’d put money on it.
David Feldman, the author of Imponderables (the original “Straight Dope”) researched this and said it was burger patties that were being counted. Thus, a Big Mac would count twice while a Fillet O’Fish wouldn’t count at all. I don’t think they had chicken sandwiches back when they actually posted real numbers, eg “50 Billion Served”.
All this talk of billions and billions made me think of, who else, Carl Sagan. Anyway, in keeping with the non-sequitur nature of my more blatant pads, I wonder what alien life would think of an ostensibly intelligent species eating little greasepucks served with a starchy little patty called ‘meat’ for some unobvious reason. They might decide to give up on humans entirely and talk to the rats. Or the second-highest intelligence, the dolphins. And nobody wants to know what the alien teens do to poor bovines in the middle of the night. 
I’ll stop now.
The pattie count prior to 1968 might have worked. After that the Pittsburg owner, Jim Delligatti, would have popularized the BiG Mac and thrown all counts off.
I once saw a Bizarro cartoon that showed a giant McDonalds-esque sign, arches and all, literally smack dab in the middle of a packed stretch of highway. The sign read “McObstacle”, and below it, “Billions Swerved”.
Related SD column: How many cows are slaughtered each year to make McDonald’s hamburgers? Cecil said they were selling 5 billion burgers every 16 months.
