Bird Owners - Need Suggestions & Encouragement

Quickly - I need some new ideas on how to interact with my birds If you don’t feel a need for background skip down to the next bolded text.

Here’s why:

As anyone who own birds knows, they can become very attached to individuals and also love routine.

Life at my house has been anything but routine for the past six months.

I have two cockatiels and a green cheeck conure. The cockatiels seem less affected by all the uproar, although Sydney has upped his feather-picking (He’s not entirely bald, but it’s been an issue all his life) which is hardly surprising in response to stress. The cockatiels seem to be less stressed, perhaps because they’re are two of them. I’m still concerned about interacting with them, but Griffin the Conure is more of a problem.

Griffin was largely raised from baby to adult by my husband. His first word was my husband’s name (…awwwww…cute, right?). He’s been calling for Mr. B. He flies into the bedroom and paces up and down on Mr. B’s side of the bed going “Mr. B., Mr. B., Mr. B”. I come into the home and after “DidJaMissMe?” I hear “Mr. B, Mr. B, Mr. B”. Aside from reducing me to a sobbing mess a few times last week, it seems pretty clear Griffin has noticed a continuing absence of Mr. B. There’s not a goddamned thing anyone can do about that.

On top of that, Griffin has been irritable, nipping, clinging, and less than cooperative. He’s unhappy, and some of that may be him picking up on my distress.

Unfortunately, with only one human in the household and said human needing to Do Stuff outside the home they aren’t allowed out of the cage as much as they used to be. This isn’t negotiable, it’s a matter of safety. They are getting more time outside the cage since I’m not gone 12-15 hours a day between work and hospital (sorry about that, birds, I really am, but it was a bad time for all of us) though even then I was making sure they’d get some exercise time every day.

So… I need to give them more quality time.

Griffin is the most demanding of attention. Our four main forms of interaction are:

  1. Food (he’s a bird, what can I say?) including yummy treats like sharing bits of fruit I’m eating, or nuts I’m snacking on, and so on.
  2. Keys - he loves playing with keys (oo! SHINY!) and has a few on a ring on the living room perch to play with. We’ll take turns shaking them and he’ll play tug of war with them.
  3. Imitating games - he says a word or phrase and I’ll repeat it back to him. He’s thrilled he’s taught a human to do tricks. Sometimes we go the other way with me leading.
  4. Grooming - he’ll groom my hair, my braids, my clothes… he doesn’t really want me to reciprocate, he’s never been fond of petting or scratching by humans.

He’ll also “help” with dish washing and other cleaning by sitting on my shoulder, obstructing my view, or running down my arm to my hands to “assist” but while I usually let him “help” with the dishes or a few other things, quite often in order to do heavy cleaning or cooking I have to lock him up. He can usually still watch from the cage and sometimes we can play the word imitating game while I do thing.

Need new ideas for interacting with him, games, and so forth. When I go back to work full time there be less social time for them all again. He’s already stressed, showing signs of anger, nipping (as I said), making angry noises, looking for Mr. B so while at times he’s still our sweet little bird about half the time he’s a little brat or furious at seemingly everything.

I also need ideas for doing more with the cockatiels. Most evenings before bed they’ll sit on my shoulders for some together time, and they’re still hand-tame. We’re getting back to where they’ll step up on my finger and let me put them back in the cage without having to chase them down so that’s an improvement over a month ago (because with everything else I needed uncooperative birds, right?). Some of their social needs are taken care of by there being two of them, although both are still interested in interacting with people (especially people with food). Griffin and the cockatiels will interact, but Griffin seems to require more people attention. He is a bit spoiled, like most pets.

In the cage we usually have a cardboard box they spend time demolishing (replaced as needed), hide treats inside of it, and otherwise use as a toy. There is also a hanging wood toy with nooks for hiding treats in and for chewing. I try not to clutter the cage up too much.

Anyhow - I’m worried about my birds, which are upset by the household upset, displaying some behavior/stress issues, and which I am now wholly responsible for. I want calm, well-behaved, well socialized birds living happy bird lives even if one of the flock is now gone.

First off, I am sorry for the loss to your “flock”.

Former cockatiel and maroon-bellied conure owner (currently have a senegal with more attitude than both previous parrots combined).

Encouragement: though they are definitely noticing the change, parrots are VERY adaptable. This is well proven through the many successful adoptions and transitions parrots can go through. My senegal was an escapee that I adopted, and he has settled in just fine.
Parrots are very social owing to their flock mentality. There are a couple types of “attention” that you need to provide. There’s the “let them know/be aware of what you’re doing”, and then there’s the more one-on-one attention (think mother-child story time). It sounds like you are doing plenty of the first type - just letting them know what you’re doing, and letting them see you while you’re in the house (out of cage time, etc.). As to the second type, the one-on-one time, this is important too. But you don’t need to provide a whole lot of this (as much as the parrot will take all they can get !). From the classes I took, depending on the parrot, only 5 minutes a day may be enough. This is “I’m focused entirely on you” time -maybe playing, or head scratching, or (in my case) just watching as they do their more intensive grooming.

Suggestions: from my experience, parrots get used to routines - including the periods when no human is around. This usually becomes just “chill” time. But parrots are also very intelligent and may need stimulation to keep them occupied. From what you describe, some more/different toys sound like they would be helpful (the more they can destroy, the better). And also devising puzzles for them to work on while you’re away. A good one I’ve found is to start with one of those day-of-the-week pill carriers. You hide treats in some of the “days”, and the parrot has to open the containers to get the treat.
Once that is no longer a challenge, you start upping the difficulty: wrap the pill container in newspaper. Then put the pill container in the empty paper towel roll. You get the idea.
There are also some toys that you put treats (like unshelled almonds) inside, and the bird has to either figure out how to get the treat out, or eat the treat while it is in the toy. Again, once they get good at getting the treat, you start making it more difficult (like situate it so they have to hang upside down to work on it).
The thing about toys - you can rotate them not only through each of your birds, but also into storage and then back out again.

Lastly, if you’re not doing this already, be sure they are getting a good 10 hours of undisturbed sleep each night. This may require 1) covering them, 2) having a separate sleeping cage in a separate room (that you can close the door). Particularly if they’re stressed, this will allow them to get a good night’s sleep to recharge, and will help them adjust to the changes going on.

Actually, while their cage is usually in the living room I’ve been bringing it into the bedroom at night so we all sleep in one room - I just couldn’t stand NOT having the sound of something else in the bedroom at night. Then when I get up in the morning I leave their cage in the bedroom with door closed while I go do people things in the rest of the apartment. So they’re getting their rest, even if some nights I’m not getting mine.

And yes, I have all three in one large cage. I used to have a cage for each bird but several years ago they all decided to go into one cage together and protested being separated. Apparently, they all want to share the same cage. There haven’t been any problems with them all being in the same cage so we’ve let them do it. I realize that’s contrary to accepted practice for many people but, as I said, it was a choice the birds made, not us. If they’re happier that way I’ll let them be unconventional. I still have the other two cages so if that changes or they need to be separated due to illness or injury I can do that.

My lovebird used to love hanging out on a coat hanger on the shower rod while I showered. He also liked to play in the sink with just a little water in it. Then of course there’s lots of busy preening time afterwards.