Bite Ass, Mr. Nightclub Bathroom Attendant

[Cheesesteak]

@THespos

Remember that we’re not talking about the bathroom attendants you might find at a classy restaurant or hotel. We’re talking about the pushy, dirty ones at nightclubs that leave you with the feeling of being shaken down.

Here’s the trick, a bathroom attendant doesn’t have to be pushy and try to shake you down. With telemarketing, it’s pretty much the job description.

There are plenty of BA’s who sit quietly, hand you a towel, and don’t pressure you into doing anything. They actually do provide a service, keeping the bathroom in usable condition, and throwing a buck their way isn’t such a bad deal.

There isn’t a single telemarketer who has ever enhanced my life experience. There are bathroom attendants who have kept bathrooms I used clean, and have had mints/gum/cologne available if I happened to need them.

[BMalion]

The last one I remember was at the Burbank Bar & Grill, he was quiet and unobtrusive. I felt no discomfort with his presence and the bathroom was sparkling.

@lowbrass

There was a priceless SNL sketch once where Kevin Nealon played a restroom attendant who sat next to a patron while the patron was using the toilet, sprayed air freshener as the guy did his business, and handed him toilet paper when he was done. Really captured that feeling of intrusiveness we get from those attendants.

what made it all the funnier was that the attendant was in the stall, with the customer (played by Chris Farley).

[Anaamika]

@Flutterby

Only at one club do I recall seeing one. She has all these jars of things, combs, gum, candy, mints, kleenex… incidentals that you might not think to drop in your little purse for a night at the club but might end up needing. She also usually hands out paper towel and coupons for the club. Nice lady.

Hmm. I wonder why not condoms?

Count me in as another who is totally creeped out by bathroom attendants. I understand why they’re there, I just don’t like them. Usually I do tip, but whatever change I have in my pocket.

[Flutterby]

@Anaamika

Hmm. I wonder why not condoms?

She may have had condoms, I don’t know. I make it a matter of course to carry them when I go out for a night on the town, even if I don’t intend to use them, so I only glanced at the jars on the counter.

[velvetjones]

Back in the olden days (early 1980s) my rock band used to work quite often at the local navy base (now closed and turned into a neo-urban development) at the enlisted men’s club which was called The Mariner’s Club. The ladies room there had an attendant and she had a full compliment of makeup, perfume, hairspray, comes, brushes etc. I guess the navy girls maybe didn’t have those things just coming out of basic training.

By and large the ladies rooms I’ve been in that had attendants weren’t all that nice, just busy. The nicest ladies rooms I’ve been in (like the Ritz Carlton Lobby Lounge) don’t have an attendant, they just have a woman who comes around and cleans them on a regular basis. Of course there you dry your hands on a real cloth towel and the TP is folded in a neat little triangle at the end and there’s a place to sit and put on lipstick without standing over a sink.

I’ve been a musician for a long time, I’ve seen the inside of a lot of ladies rooms in many, many different bars, clubs, restraunts, etc. I once considered writing a book of wall scribblings but figured it had been done already.