When I was in high school I awoke and went downstairs to get my breakfast only to find a note at my place at the table from my mom: “Andy Warhol died.”
I called and said I wouldn’t be in and went back to bed, devestated.
Not to weird, but I used to call in to play Everquest. Hard to believe that was 10 years ago. Seems like yesterday.
i have never called in sick …i did call in horny once
I got up, went to my fridge in my underwear & bare feet, no glasses or slippers either, opened the refrigerator door…
…and the door fell off.
Broken jelly jars everywhere, & me in bare feet with no glasses on to see the little shards.
Surprise!
While I was working at Disney World, I was visited for a weekend by a female friend. I tried to get a day off so I could spend more time with/on her, but the powers that be said no. So I called in, and I didn’t even give a reason. “Hi, this is Cryptic, I’m working Tigger at Pooh’s Playground, and I’m not coming in today.” hang up 
I smashed my face into the floor, nearly broke my jaw and had…
oh strange reasons…never mind.
Back in the Stone Age, before cable TV, TiVo, DVD’s, Blu-Ray, On-Demand movies, and VCRs were in their infancy and we didn’t have one yet, I called in sick to watch “Gone With The Wind” on network TV. Commercials and all. 
Wasn’t a “sick” call but I called in the morning of work for a personal day - because one of my rabbits had a floppy ear.
See, he’s not a floppy-eared (lop) rabbit, and so one morning as I was getting ready for work, his right ear was down for about an hour. It resisted all attempts to get him to lift it back up himself - I could pick it up, but it’d flop down hard immediately after letting go. Checking symptoms, he didn’t appear to have what could be a terrible neurological emergency (“head tilt”, which looks like what it sounds like), but he might have a middle ear infection. I called the emergency hours line for our vet, and they agreed it might be that and he should really be seen today.
So I E-mailed my coworker and direct boss that I needed a day for a personal emergency and that I’d be in tomorrow, then drove my husband to work (we only have one car, and I take the train to work) so I could have the car to drive the rabbit to the vet. I get home to pack the rabbit into the carrier to go to the vet… and I see both ears are up. Just fine. Like nothing ever happened. :smack:
I told him I was taking him in anyway. They didn’t see anything wrong, figured he must have had some hidden something or other (a bit of hay, perhaps) poking him in a spot that my exam with a penlight didn’t turn up.
(I didn’t have any active responsibilities that day, so that was fine work-wise.)
Crapulence.
My cousin had just bought a new horse one state over in Illinois and needed me to go with her to pick the half wild 3 year old filly up. We figured an hour there, an hour to load, an hour back, an hour to get the horse setted in, left the house at 7 AM, should give me plenty of time to be at work by 3 PM.
Never underestimate a half wild 3 year old filly.
This was in the days before cell phones, so we had to park a horse trailer in front of my suburban home on the way to the boarding stable so I could call in at about 2:45 pM and tell my employer I wouldn’t be in that night…Didn’t tell them WHY…
Not calling in sick, but another method. A friend of mine once told me about the “I can’t tell you” day off.
You call in and say “I’m really sorry, I can’t make it in today.”
“Why not?”
“I can’t tell you.”
“Huh?”
“I’m sorry, I can’t tell you.”
The beauty of this is you’re not lying! They think something terrible’s happened, but what you’re really saying is “I can’t tell you because if I did, you’d fire me.”
Many years ago I tried this. The HR person got really exasperated but eventually relented, and I went back to bed for a nice lazy day.
When I came in the next day, they’d docked it from my vacation days. Not the perfect outcome but I did score an unplanned day of vacation from a strict system.
I called in sick to work once, but I can’t remember the excuse I gave. The real reason I wasn’t going in is because I was tripping. 2 hits of acid at 10PM before work is not a good idea…although I did have fun unloading the dishwasher.
I called out of work once so that I could finish the novel I was reading.
I called out recently and told my boss I had driven half way there and turned around and came back home because I wasn’t feeling well. He said OK, you don’t sound too good. I really had a hangover. I had never even got up at all. Am I going to Hell?
Clearly yes.
Maybe not. You’ll get half way there and turn around.
See post #9 above.
Crapulence:
- Sickness caused by excessive eating or drinking.
- Excessive indulgence; intemperance.
I was watching TV, one night and they had a show about the UAE. I realised I had;nt visited there for months, and not on vacation for years (keep in mind, I live in Pakistan). I grabbed my laptop, booked a ticket for the next morning and a hotel room, popped off an email to my boss, that I would not be coming in till Monday (this was a Wedensday night) as I was sick. Then spent a lovely long weekend in Dubai. Of course I was punished for this, a couple of weeks later, I actually got sick with the worst flu ever, I could barely walk, I had such a high fever and headache. I lasted a day and a half, until my boss ordered me home one afternoon, with an instruction to see a specialist, as this was clearly a relapse and not good. My court calender was upset for weeks afterwards.
I’ve come in late because concert tickets were going on sale in the morning and I wanted to be able to get good seats. I was honest about it though. I am going to do it again on Monday.
Sometimes you need to call in, but legitimately cannot tell them the reason.
Several years ago, a, uh, event occurred in a close family member’s life. It was something that deeply affected myself and my brother, my parents and a couple other family members.
Anyway, I was working graveyard shift at a nursing home, and I found out about this right before I had to leave for work. That night, I was a zombie. I guess I just sorta stared at the walls, wouldn’t talk to people, and would just walk away anytime someone tried to strike up a conversation with me. I was always the smartass and the joker, and one night I show up with a completely different demeanor. I wouldn’t even answer when they asked what was wrong. My co-workers were understandably spooked, and called my boss, who came in before my shift ended to see what the hell was going on. She dragged me into her office and demanded an explanation. I couldn’t tell her the truth, and told her so. I had worked for her for long enough for her to know that there was something seriously wrong. To her credit, she didn’t ask for details after that. A 6’3, 290lb bearded man sitting in her office fighting back tears must have convinced her. I told her I was going to be a wreck for a few days, and my previously sunny disposition would probably be replaced my a pretty thick streak of assholeness.
So, if I would have called in, I would not have been able to tell them why. A legitimate excuse.