Black Guy Attends Romney Rally

davidm · September 29, 2012, 2:23am

Romney photographer Jeff Jenson spotted Maris in the crowd and asked him to come up on stage to stand behind the candidate

…

“It was great,” he said. “I got to stand right behind Paul and Mitt and even got to shake their hands afterwards. At first Mitt didn’t know who I was and tried to order a drink. But once I explained things, he was very friendly.”

Asked about it afterwards, Mr. Romney said that he was happy to have Maris there for support, but that he’s “known many black people.” He went on to add, “I’ve had relationships with a number of African-Americans. There was a guy I knew at Bain once, ah, what was his name? There’s that waiter Charlie over at Smith and Wollensky’s that we always like to joke with. Yeah, he’s grand, just grand! And, of course, one of my chauffeurs is black. In fact, just yesterday I said hello to him. And we, ah, we talked about the weather. It was a very nice conversation.”

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“They offered me accommodations for myself and my family at the nicest hotels, but I had to tell them I couldn’t do it,” Maris said. “At that point they told me that I wouldn’t have to worry because they’d make sure to forward my welfare check. I had to explain to them that I’m not on welfare – that I couldn’t leave because of job obligations. This seemed to confuse them, but they started to get the idea after a while.”

monstro · September 29, 2012, 3:01am

I’m really dumb. It wasn’t until I got to the last sentence when I realized this is not for real.

Lancia · September 29, 2012, 3:21am

Poe’s law in action.

There’s a story making the FB rounds about Michelle Bachman wanting to ban falafel and hummus in schools because kids eating middle eastern foods are one step away from becoming terrorists. Very much in the same vein, it isn’t until the end of the story that you realise it’s a joke.

Suil_Dubh · September 29, 2012, 3:49am

This is the only line the writer needed to use. The rest is overkill.

davidm · September 29, 2012, 10:52am

I honestly was not trying to pass this off as real. I just thought it was funny. It’s worth reading the whole thing. It’s not much longer than the 4 paragraphs I excerpted.