Bodypoet hits the parenting wall

Whew. Mr. bodypoet has worked, since Wednesday at 7:00 p.m., 3 twelve-hour shifts, which is the norm. However, he has ALSO, against the wise advice of both his lovely wife and his competent marriage counselor, worked about 15 hours of overtime.
So he has worked, come home, slept, and gone back to work any number of times since Thursday night. He’s in the bedroom now, sleeping. Or dead, I’m not sure. Hopefully, sleeping, because I need a break.
The older boys went to their dad’s for the weekend, so the babies and I have been hanging out by ourselves since Friday evening. (Can it be only yesterday? It seems so long, long ago.)
This morning, we all got up at 4:30, because they have to go on the paper route with me when their older brothers are gone. (Once every two weeks only, thank goodness.) Nothing more fun than delivering a hundred or so papers–in the rain, whoohoo!–with a 3 year old kicking the back of your seat and asking, every 4.5 seconds, “We go home now? Tanner go HOME?”

Now, just for the record, I’ve been a good and patient mommy. And just for the record, I am very glad that I don’t have to parent all alone all the time, because it would quite likely drive me bats. I do great until, oh, about day 3 or 4. All of a sudden, I realize that the clean AND dirty laundry is strewn all over the floor, there is macaroni and cheese permanently adhering to the coffee table, the baby has learned to boot up the computer, the cat is sick again, the dog water is now full of dog food (courtesy of said baby), it’s jhot in here, and something–or someone–stinks. That’s when I hit the wall*, throw up my hands, and try to decide what to do with my life:
A. Run away? You know they would find me. They would–just the way they do every time I sneak into the bathroom to try to pee in peace, and they come knocking on the door. If I ever disappear in the Adirondacks or something, just tell my kids “Mommy needs some private time,” and they’ll find me before I can even exhaust my emergency chocolate rations.
B. Lock 'em outside? They would get fingerprints all over the windows and run the car battery down playing with the lights.
C. Lock MYSELF outside? Last time I walked out of the room, I returned to find my son talking to the operator, who was inquiring kindly if he required an ambulance? And you can just bet that no one is going to pick up all this laundry before I come back.

So, obviously, the only choice is to drink some orange juice with just a tad of pineapple rum, wake up Mr bodypoet (assuming he isn’t dead), and take a long, hot bath. With the door locked, and maybe some ear plugs in. And an emergency ration of chocolate.

sigh Anyone for some peace and quiet?

*figuratively, not literally. Otherwise, I couldn’t type.

God, I feel for you! Mr. Legend has been going out of town on business weekly for the past year, and this past month they changed his schedule from Tues-Fri to Mon-Fri. I’ve been feeling sorry for myself, but your plight puts it in perspective.

A) My children are, blessedly, school-aged, and I can legally turn them over to someone else for most of the day and

B) I don’t have to go to work, or, God forbid, take them to work with me (what little I do, I do at home).

The past two weeks, however, I’ve had two field trips, two in-service days (DIFFERENT ones for the middle-schooler and the third-grader), the dog has had ticks, and spring has somehow snuck up on me, requiring me to pay attention to the yard.

I hope things ease up for you soon. Mr. Legend will, with any luck, be able to start working at home half-time in a month or two (at which time I’ll start complaining about how he’s underfoot all the time). I also try to keep remembering that although I have to deal with everything on my own all week, I don’t have to pay the bills by myself, and I at least still get sex on the weekends. There’s always a silver lining, eh?

You have my empathy.

Mr. Persephone and I both do our parenting separately. He’s a musician, so during the day, he’s a stay-at-home-dad. I’m the primary breadwinner. I work eight hours a day, Monday through Friday. Then when I get home, he’s either got students (he teaches at a music store) or gigs. Oh some days he’s got both.

It’s been like this for a while now. When I told him that I was pregnant with our second child, the first words out of his mouth were “What? How did that happen?” Since he was already a father, I told him that I was pretty sure he knew what was required for a pregnancy to occur. He said “No, no, no. I meant to say 'when ’ did it happen???”


One of these days I’ll have a life. And sex on the weekends.

Ah, sex. I remember sex.

You just described my life, only I do parent all alone all the time. But just when you think you can’t possibly take another minute they do something so sweet you know it’s all worth it :slight_smile:

The alcohol, bath and chocolate sound a great idea!

hang in there. I feel for you. I rarely have China bambina all to myself for even a full day, and it’s a lot of parenting.

You have every ounce of my sympathy. In 12 days I’ll be able to have alcohol again. I’m considering packing a 6-pack in my hospital bag so I can have one in the recovery room!

In 30 days my M-I-L in going in for elective surgery in another state and Leifsdad is going to be with her for a whole week and leave me with a three-week-old and a 18-month-old. Fortunately my grandmother, she’s 82 bless her soul, is going to fly from TX to get me through.

Like this afternoon.

I parent mostly alone on weekends. My 5-year-old daughter woke up with a cold this morning, and was pretty miserable and whiny most of the day. My two-year-old son was his normal, rambunctious self.

I finally got my daughter (The Dianasaur) to settle down on the couch. and cover up with a blanket and think about taking a nap. My son (Johnzilla) came over, and started trying to climb on his sister. I got him off of her, and told him that he couldn’t do that today, because Dianasaur didn’t feel good and needed to rest.

He climbed off the couch, went to his bedroom, and came back out with his blanky. His beloved Blanky. His Blanky that he loves more than anything in the world. He handed it to Diana and said “Here! Want Blanky? Blanky make you feel better!”

She didn’t take it, because she has a blanky of her own. But she thanked him, and then he gave her a hug and a kiss.

Just one of Those Moments.


I feel for you, Nortia. I divorced my first husband (well, he divorced me, and that’s a whole 'nother Jerry Springer episode in itself) when my older two boys were 4 months old and 4 years old. It was a rough couple of years…no money, a long-ass commute to work (with both babies in the car all the way), no furniture. What a time that was.
Luckily, all the boys seem to remember is that we went to the park a lot when they were little. They don’t realize it was because I couldn’t afford to do anything else. I remember saving up my change so that we could buy a bag of Doritos, and one time falling asleep in McD’s while they ate Happy Meals (in spite of the fact that a Happy Meal was a big honking deal at the time!). I always reminisce, “Well, we didn’t have much, but we had…well, not much.” :smiley:
Good thing I kept my sense of humor, I suppose.

Persephone, what sweeties you have.

Today is better. The living room is back to its normal state of semi-chaos, the kitchen is, well, not disgusting, and Mr bodypoet has caught up on his sleep.

Re: cute kid moments: Tanner, who loves to smack The Weeping Princess when she gets into his Legos, gets very upset if I discipline her. Let me raise my voice to her, and all of a sudden he is Mr. Protective Older Brother: “Don’t you hurt my BABY! You make my BABY CRY! Not do that AGAIN!” Very empathetic, that boy. She loves him crazy, too.

Heaven help me when they become teenagers…

Nothing can really really compare to parenting… I’ve been watching the ads for the Eco-Challenge on Discovery and when they say “battling exhaustion and sleep deprivation” I could only think that we do this all the time. Of course we don’t get to fight our battles in such exotic climates as New Zealand. These people should try parenting if they want a challenge. :slight_smile:

It sounds like you live at our house except I’m the guy who has been going off to work while my beloved has tried valiantly to take care of the kids, keep the house clean, and study for her finals.

She’s sleeping in this morning, I got the boys up and out the door for school and am enjoying a little quiet time as the girls are cuddled up on the couch watching Larry Boy and the Angry Eyebrows. He’s my hero.

I single parent 90 percent of the time. My 10 year old has been having poor health lately and after a hospital episode and being up straight for 48+ hours, I hot footed it into work to the chant of “you look like shit” and “you should really get some sleep you know” from several of my young, single, partying, non parent co workers.

If I didn’t love these guys, I’d smack em all :wink:

Just when I start to think my life is hard…

Leifsmama, in 30 days you’re gonna have a 3 week old and an 18 month old. You have it hard enough. :slight_smile:
If this is your second baby, I don’t have to tell you this: Let the house go to hell, let the laundry stink, let the mail pile up in the mailbox, and REST. On your butt, on the couch (or in bed, if you can manage), with a box of chocolate in one hand and a trashy novel in the other, the baby sleeping peacefully (HA!) in your lap, and the tv blaring the movies that no one else likes. Because doggone, you just had a BABY, and everybody oughta respect that!

[pauses for a few deep, calming breaths]
Whew. I get a little rabid about the whole home-in-48-hours thing. I think moms need more time, and the more kids you have at home, the more time you need. The doctors kicked me out after 48 hours. 5 weeks later, my baby was back in the hospital with a slight (turned out fine) illness. For four days, I held her, fed her, and slept beside her in her hospital room. Once I knew she wasn’t really sick, it was heaven to catch up on my rest a bit. I think I would’ve had a breakdown if she hadn’t been hospitalized.

Do let us know when the big event takes place. (Use your other hand to post to the SDMB.)