I have been (stupidly) Pitted in the past for starting a multiplicity of “Town Crier” threads in GD, and I have (reluctantly) made a somewhat successful effort to break myself of the habit.
But there are times when that undoubtedly is a useful role for a Doper to play, and this is one of those times.
Happens all the time, actually.
What, in Somalia during the Clinton years? Did the SDMB even exist then?
I doubt that.
Anything by Stan Shmenge.
Indubitably? I find that dubious.
Yes, there are. But generally about more egrerious issues. I remember one where the OP complained about a contractor using her bathroom, another where a poster complained that the neighbor’s dog had killed her cat (in the neighbor backyard), one where a…whatever are called in english people who call you at home to sell you stuff… exposed in great details how important and highly respectable his job was, and how rude and disrepectful people answering his calls were, to give some examples.
Generally, you can tell that the pitter is going to be flammed just by reading the OP.
In this case, however, the OP isn’t really pitted, it just happens that not many people share his opinion.
Telemarketer…you were looking for telemarketer.
Thanks for playing. Pat, tell him what he’s won.
“Phone whore” would also have been acceptable.
Can you also arrange for the protests to all have the same demands about the same issues? It’s hardly going to help if they’re protesting at the same time if Egypt is demanding that the dictator step down, Bahrain is demanding that the dictator live up to promises to the religious minority, and Jordan is protesting about food prices.
Doubly so.
Yes, why can’t these people get their shit together and condense their petty issues into a 15 second blurb I can watch during the commercial break. Dictators are bad. Poverty is not fun. Get the guys at Wieden & Kennedy on it and I’m sure we can get this whole thing summed up in a Nike ad.
February is national Middle East Sucks month, or something. Wrap it up!
March Madness is just around the corner.
Brain Glutton is a serial offender of the “bad pun” variety, several of which have been referred to the Hague for investigation as possible war crimes. He has also been under Board indictment for grammatic perversion and rhetorical depravity. He continues to enjoy the same posting privilege as Dopers of discernment, good taste, and propriety. This is an outrage.
Naturally, I blame liberal permissiveness.
It’s the demonrats, I tell ya!
Does anyone doubt we can keep this up all day?
Come to think of it, it would simplify everything if they were all one country (I mean, an Arabic-speaking Muslim is an Arabic-speaking Muslim!). Can that be arranged?
Nasser tried, but he didn’t get very far.
It also makes it easier to read about in the news. If I only have to read one article to know what they all want, that’s more time to read the NYTimes Style Section and see what new treasure trove in Brooklyn they’ve discovered.
I’ll see what I can do, but my powers, hard though it may be to believe, are not quite limitless. 
My beef with BrainGlutton is his dubious typing skill set. I’m pretty sure he meant ‘I never would have learned about squat!’, considering the vast numbers of people, the distances, the volumes of history, economic and potential future effects- why, there is no way one thread could keep it together!