Thanks everyone for the concern and the good thoughts.
The reality of this has knocked us right onto our asses.
Fortunately, the response from our friends and family has been heart-warming and we seem to have a strong support group.
She’s gonna have minor surgery next week to install a medi-port in preparation for chemotherapy. Chemotherapy freaks her out. The possibility of losing her hair freaks her out. Sure, I could keep reminding her that losing her hair is better than losing her life, but it comes out sounding trite. I’m a guy. I can’t totally relate to the devastation of losing a breast and then losing my hair to boot. I’m not really sure what I can say or do to make it hurt less…
C#3, what you can say and do is let her know that you love her, and possibly more importantly right now, that you LUST after her, still. I can almost guarantee that she will never tell you, but that she is worrying about whether the loss of her breast and hair has caused you to lose desire for her. Let her know that you still think of her as a desireable woman, and that she can still turn you on.
That doesn’t mean go and jump her bones right after surgery and therapy, for heaven’s sakes! But let her know that you’ve got these great plans for when she’s feeling better . . . .
I’m so sorry to hear this. Isn’t it nice, though, that all these Dopers are pulling for you and your wife? Count me among them. I’m sending good, healing thoughts your way.