First of all, let me draw everyone’s attention to one of my favorite rants from my web site, on the subject of the most horrid piece of Christmastime musical tripe ever composed, “These Christmas Shoes”:
http://www.thejtrain.net/christmasshoes.html
Now consider Rob Lowe, who thrilled us as a teen idol, narrowly escaped ruin when he made sex videos with a teenager, and had recently fought his way back to credibility with a great role on “The West Wing” that he was born to play. But it isn’t good enough for him–he’s ready for the bright lights, the big time, the chance to work with really challenging material…
…such as the starring role in “The Christmas Shoes” , the TV movie version of the book based on the aforementioned hell-spawned song.
Now, I have always fancied myself as having a keen ability to at least understand the way other people are thinking, even when I don’t agree. I am confused, however, by the mindset of anyone who would consider this song to be anything but an attempt at a lame joke. I am more confused by anyone who would put down his or her hard-earned for a CD containing this claptrap, or a book based on its idea. I am similarly flabbergasted by anyone who would use two precious hours of his or her life to watch a TV movie based on said book. Confused, saddened, and honestly, a little frightened.
Rob Lowe’s motivation, however, at this time when he is trying to propel his new-found cred into new heights, I simply cannot understand. My only guess is that there are more videotapes out there of more teenagers, and that those tapes have fallen into the wrong hands. Perhaps he is taking career advice from the guy who used to sell him smack. Perhaps he still buys and consumes said smack and his judgement is thusly impaired. Who knows?
A starring role in the Glurge Movie of the Week is not a stepping stone to anywhere. Those of us who enjoyed “St. Elmo’s Fire” back in the day owe it to Rob to help him understand this.
We also owe it to ourselves to collectively projectile vomit each time we come into contact with this song or any of its related merchandise this season, so as the streets fill with our undigested bilge, those deluded enough to perpetuate this travesty will be forced to consider the error of their ways.
Dr. J
