Bugs in ears? The horror!

I got a tiny gnat-thing in my ear once. I was leaving my building on my way to a friend’s house about 3 blocks away. I didn’t see the point in going back up to my apartment to try and get it out on my own, so made the walk over (shaking my head and sticking my pinkie in my ear periodically, blending right in with the crazies) and told him what happened when I got there. I asked for a q-tip, went to the bathroom mirror and fished around for a minute, with about 5 other people watching. It was so tiny (and loud!) I was able to smush it and pull it out on the q-tip. At least there were lots of people to help if it needed to be irrigated. Cleaned my ear a little with another q-tip and peroxide, and the party continued incident free.

Special class of horror, right here.

We see these in the ER on a regular, though not necessarily frequent basis. One doc I know tells the story of looking in with the otoscope and seeing 8 pairs of eyes looking back at him, he decided to kill it with some lidocaine, but that just cause the spider to come flying out, problem solved.

Much easier to aim a tiny stream of beer when it’s been, uh, processed into pee. At least for a man.

Also: waste not, want not!

Oh dear God. That might turn me into the moaning coma guy. After I screamed myself hoarse. I’m not sure I can go to sleep now.

So, this establishes a market for custom fitted, acoustically transparent mesh ear hole grilles, right?

I’ve known quite a few people with a bug up their ass. But that’s not quite the same thing, is it?

Yes, I’ve had bugs fly into my ear. I hate that feeling.

As I have mentioned before, a roach - one of the tropical, 2-inch-long ones - crawled into my husband’s ear while we were sleeping one night. The physician on night duty at the clinic said he was lucky it was a big one - it’s harder to get the small ones out.

It’s common as all get-out. I’ve removed bugs from ears many times in my career. The only people with real ear damage are the ones who tried to dig them out themselves. If gentle irrigation with water or water/vinegar mix doesn’t get it out, go to urgent care.

Horrifying as these personal tales are, as the saying goes, the plural of anecdote is not data… But…

I’m afraid that does count as data.

So I repeat - this establishes a market for custom fitted, acoustically transparent mesh ear hole grilles, right?

And let me clarify this time: DEAR GOD SOMEBODY GET BUSY MAKING THIS PRODUCT!!

I dunno man, closing off the ears while leaving other orifices open might be too inviting. I think it’s best to go all the way.

They could modify these nostril filters.

Yes, they’re real; I saw them on Shark Tank!

I saw it too!

I love Shark Tank…

When you get right down to it, a lot of data is merely high quality anecdote.

http://www.popthatzit.com/2010/11/gross-ear-tick/
http://www.popthatzit.com/2012/01/birth-of-a-beetle-graphic/
http://www.popthatzit.com/2012/01/new-year-maggot-party-spoiled-by-doctor/

and of course…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ydXenL7iu0w

Oh god.

One of my friends woke up with a spider in his ear. I don’t remember the details because I was probably cringing when he told me.
Now, I love spiders, so I hope that was an isolated event.

it is not unusual for a earwig 2 go in someones ear.it can cause balance problems.how 2 remove it?simple,mineral oil.they back right out…with a strand of ur brain…not really

i know this.why?friend had one in his ear.attached itself to his inner ear.couldn’t stand up and felt like hurlingfreaked him out.by the way.those aren’t pincers on a earwig.thats it’s sexual organs.which in a way is more disturbing.what is it doing in there?

No, they’re pincers. They pinch. They pinch prey, and they pinch other earwigs in defense and mating challenges and, uh, well, earwigs apparently like rough sex, because they do use their pincers in mating - but they’re not genitals, they’re pincers.

While it’s not impossible for an earwig to wander into your ear, they’re no more prone to it than cockroaches and moths and spiders, name withstanding. There are no reports of actual injury from an earwig, other than the screaming heebie jeebies. And if an earwig can reach the *inner *ear, you’ve got more problems on your hands than a bug in your ear. Like, why your eardrum is missing.