Burger Wars Re-re-redux

Alright, wrong-coasters. Your bluff has been called. Five Guys has been moving into Southern California, and we finally managed to get there for lunch today.

Better than In-N-Out? Not hardly. The burgers are good, and the variety of toppings are a point in their favor, but In-N-Out still beats them on flavor. In fact, so does **The Hat **and Farmer Boys. Five Guys turns in a solid B+ burger, and that’s nothing to sneeze at, but transcendent it ain’t.

The fries, OTOH, beat In-N-Out hands down. Skin-on, cooked well and very generous servings get Five Guys a solid A in this category.

So for chain burgers, it goes:

1. Fuddruckers
2. In-N-Out
3. Farmer Boys
4. The Hat
5. Five Guys


  1. The Hat
  2. Five Guys
  3. McDonalds
  4. Farmer Boys
  5. Everybody else**
    Now that that’s settled, we can address the minor questions of the day, like “Why would a benevolent God allow people to use mayo as a base for BBQ sauce?”

Five Guys has moved into the Chicago area and it sucks. They must be riding solely off their reputation because their burgers are insanely overpriced and not all that great. You do get a lot of fries. Yay. I can swing a dead cat and hit four burger joints that fill your bag with fries and they don’t charge you upwards of $10 for a basic combo. Fries are cheap… give me a half-decent burger and knock a few bucks off the price.

You forgot…


I didn’t forget them, they just don’t make my Top 5.

No top five list of Southern California burger chains is valid without Tommy’s.

Feh. Fatburger is better than In-N-Out. Burgers are marginally better because they put salt and pepper on them, and the fries are far superior.

This is a joke, right? It has to be either a joke or from Europe where BBQ is not like North America.

This song addresses that issue.

Elmer - If it’s chiliburgers we are talking about, then Tommy’s makes it onto the list. But for straight burgers, no way.

what is it about message boards that every one of them seems to have to repeatedly argue about which fast-food burger is better?

Note to self- be careful ordering BBQ in Alabama…

I went to a “Five Guys” the other day. I thought the burgers were fine, but I agree that In-n-out’s are better. I went for the cajun fries, which were terrible, so I’ll have to try the regular fries next time. One bonus, or at least it will be a bonus if the fries are good, is they give you about three pounds of them.

Cough … Apple Pan … cough … .

That’s why I said “chain burgers.” There are too many one-offs around to have any “meaningful” argument.

tearfully we know, we know. Please don’t rub it in. Five Guys is acceptable but by no means an equal competitor. It simply fills the “under $7 tipping not required” burger niche.

Nailed it. One of my Washington friends waa raving about Five Guys so I had to give it a chance. The burger was average at best, and I didn’t even like the fries (though i duh the amount). It has nothing on In N Out, which gives me a mouthgasm every time I go.

A Five Guys opened in Bellingham, and I’ve tried it. The burgers taste similar to Wendy’s. Which isn’t bad, mind. Just not ‘all that’. In-N-Out burgers are better. (And Fatburgers are better than In-N-Out. :stuck_out_tongue: )

You should lose The Hat in favor of Fatburger.

The Hat’s stock in trade is Pastrami, not Burgers.

BTW, nice to know you’re a socalian!

But The Hat makes great burgers as well. Besides, I may be in the minority, but I don’t think Fatburger is all that great. Better than most fast-food burgers, but not good enough to make my Top 5.

The Hat rocks the pastrami, most definitely.

It’s easy for you CA pukes to lord it over the rest of us while you keep places like In N Out and The Hat all to yourselves. How are we supposed to make a comparison: mail order? It’s time to cut you bastards loose from the rest of the normal states.

I disagree. I’ve only eaten at four of them in the Chicagoland area, but their burgers are definitely top-of-the-charts when it comes to fast-food style burgers. They’re no In-N-Out, but they’re up there.

My fast food burger list:

  1. In-N-Out
  2. Fatburger
  3. Five Guys
  4. Culvers
  5. Whataburger

As for fries, as far as I’m concerned, it’s Five Guys, McDonald’s, (both different enough styles) and then everybody else. I don’t know what “The Hat” is, though.