It’s only a model.
I wonder what else we can get Cicero to do?
Put the pig back, with a note in it that reads, “Don’t blame me, mate! It was empty when I found it.”
On the contrary, you found something far more valuable than mere money. In that humble little piggy…
cue Very Special Episode theme music
…you found your courage.
Maybe not entirely empty… didn’t you see the dust wafting out of it? The spores drifting towards you?
How are you feeling, btw? Maybe a little fevery?
Give it a day or two till the pandemic’s well under way, then see if there are any Mods left to change your alias to “Patient Zero”…
I guffawed.
Cicero, when you say it was empty, do you mean that you could tell by the weight that it was empty, or that you looked inside it to confirm? A million dollar bill, for example, is quite light. (OK, yes, also nonexistent. However, there are things that have value but as good as no weight.)
Are you positive that your crawlspace isn’t littered with half a dozen different pigs? All arranged in different spots under your house, as if they were waiting for, I don’t know, some sort of signal before stirring into action? Like, oh, for example, one of their number suddenly being removed from his space and taken into the target? I mean house?
Maybe you should check out the entire crawlspace just to be sure. Go ahead, we’ll wait here.
I got the pig out and looked inside. If there are more pigs there, they are staying there.
Thanks Hermette. You have me thinking anthrax now.
Shhh.
“What is the best treatment for Captain Trips? Need answer fast.”
Good job, Cicero! Thanks for relieving our curiosity. I was afraid it was going to be like the 14 k f g in a p f d or whatever.
Hey! Maybe there’s pirate treasure buried somewhere under that crawlspace.
Why wouldn’t there be?
I’m holding out until I see photographic evidence of said pig having been removed.
Crap! I was just going to reference this. Darn you, Anaamika!
shakes fist
I saw what you did there… 
I know how it got down there, and why it was empty!
Because he went under there to empty his older brother’s, long since fallen into disuse, piggy bank. He left the pig there so no one would ever be the wiser.
It’s just so obvious.
Perhaps. But this one moved itself from beneath the kitchen towards the entrance it had seen, as if trying to escape. Perhaps there are others.
Maybe the pig was a marker for something buried?
Oooo, intriguing idea! Cicero, go on back under the house and dig around in the area where you found the pig. Then dig around under the kitchen, just to be sure.
We’ll wait here.
::Sings:: “Spider-Pig, Spider-Pig, does whatever a Spider-Pig does. . .”
And the note you leave when you put it back should just say “Gotcha-Ya!” With a link to this thread. . .
Sure, that’s bound to happen any minute now.
That’s Chicken Little Cicero we’re talking about, here. Remember?