With my miserable failure in selecting appropriate options in the previous thread At what age did you consider yourself “grown up”? and with nobody (that I have seen) trying for a better group, here’s an effort for a more meaningful anonymous poll.
Double income no kids… Like I said last thread, LGBT/Peter Pan syndrome go hand in hand. I’m 41 and have given up on waiting for the grown up feeling to kick in. I like shows like Tosh.0 and watch Qubo afterdark most nights when He-Man and She-Ra are on just for fun. Mom died when I was 16 and Dad is still kicking. Maybe when He passes away it’ll happen, but I doubt it. I have a strong suspicion that the whole “Grown Up” thing is tied strongly to raising children. Since that’s not gonna happen for me, well, I guess I’m not gonna grow up…
I had a good deal of freedom as a teenager, and was living on my own and supporting myself totally by 19, so I’ve considered myself an adult since the moment I was fully moved into my own apartment. That was 8 years ago now, damn.
When both girls had gone off to college, and I looked at The Wife and realized that I was finally, consciously, comfortable with my life. Being a grown-up is more than being a responsible citizen; it also includes some honest self-assessment and satisfaction with what you have made of yourself.
Yeah…no. I mean I do that kind of stuff. I watch Tosh.0 when I have access to it. I also watch silly cartoons and never ever intend to have children.
But I certainly feel grown up. Not just a bank account but my own private savings accounts, retirement account, safety deposit box, new car, going back to school, being able to afford all of these things, considering my future career, and electing to get my tubes blocked to not have children, all of these things let me know I am grown up. Double income no kids too, but I’m still all growed up, thank you very much. I just choose to remain young at hearts. Mayhap kids just make you old.
I really don’t think I woke up one day and said “hey, I’m all grown up.”
I guess a defining moment would be when I started my first full time job 250 miles away from home at the age of 22. My company paid for my flight and bus ride to my new town. I borrowed $300 from my Dad and left home with a suitcase. I lived in a company-provided motel for 3 weeks; then crashed on someone’s couch for a couple of months before renting a house with a guy from work. A few months later I got a bank loan, bout a used car and officially received my adult credentials: own place, own car, own bills.
At 27 I still don’t feel grown up in this sense of at all having my life together in the economic or responsibilty sense, and I don’t forsee that happening for quite a while, if ever. Intellectually though, I was there by 17. All that’s different now is I know more stuff, my worldview and sense of self are pretty much the same as then.
22, when I moved partway across the country for my first job after college. I packed all of my junk into a SUV and moved into a sublet, all paid with money I earned that summer. Before then, my parents paid most of my living expenses and tuition. Since then I’ve been entirely independent, and have done lots of Grown Up Stuff like getting married, paying off my first car, etc.