Bah, if you’re a real man, the ceiling.
the ceiling?!? ha! if you are a real man, damn plaster lathe means NOTHING.
watch out Sputnik, here i come…
jb
Callouses.
posted by jbfarley:
<<watch out Sputnik, here i come…>>
Sputnik? Bah. Who do you think REALLY messed up the Hubbard telescope?
Jupiter’s next, here I cum!
wow, so that’s what 2001 was all about! hmmm. all the universe needs is some big black ‘monolith’?
jb
p.s.- ‘Hubble’
jb sez:
<<p.s.- ‘Hubble’>>
Ummmmmm…
I was talkin’ about the OTHER big telescope out in space that no one’s heard about yet… Ummm… Yeah…
::shuffles off, muttering. Two mush masterbasion…::
Right. I don’t understand the question.
I’m not a doctor or anything, but I think it is possible that excessive masturbation can make your penis somewhat crooked. Maybe if you alternate left-handed/right-handed each time they will cancel each other out and it will stay straight.
[miagi]
wacks on, wacks off
[/miagi]
I’m surprised no one mentioned the woman working at a phone sex hotline who successfully sued her company because she had masturbated so much at work, she ended up with carpal tunnel syndrome.
Ugh…I just searched Google every which way and could not find an article about this woman (dammit! and I know it happened…it’s been a year or two now), but man, you want to read some weird stuff…search Google using “masturbate” and “lawsuit.”
I heard the same thing Ruffian did about the masturbating phone-sex woman; the story got on TV and the radio where I live.
Anyway. It seems as though sex and/or masturbation could aggravate a lot of problems that might already exist. I know that I’ve had various medical problems (an injured this, an inflamed that–I’ll spare you all the details), and that sex made the attendent pain even worse.
That said, my seventh grade health teacher assured us during our thirty second block of instruction on masturbation that jacking off was perfectly normal and that it would never cause any real health problems.
[debunk]Untrue. Peyronie’s disease can cause this, but not excessive masturbation. Whacking off so hard you break your penis is not excessive masturbation, it’s clumsy or ill-advised masturbation[/debunk]
Am I the only one that finds it hysterically funny that chrisb 69 's first post is about masturbation?
Do you guys mean to tell me that the girl on the other end of the phone-sex line is actually masturbating???
(whispering…)
With the certain technique I always use, I get hand cramps sometimes if I’m really on a roll…
I think that’s the most personal thing I’ve told on this message board. Maybe.
You only cum to Jupiter? Ha! I can do it beyond the infinite!
Uranus is next. Here I cum! Tee-hee.
How did masturbation cause her tunnel to become reminiscent of carp?
It all started innocently…a couple minutes here, a couple minutes there. Next thing I knew, I was up to a box of Kleenex a day, then two, then three. Now I spend almost all my time alone in the bathroom. Sure, I’ve tried to quit…but I always come back (no pun intended of course). Who am I really hurting anyway?
Things have gotten progressively worse. I’ve moved my refrigerator and tv into the bathroom so I don’t even have to go out anymore. Almost all my money has been spent on tissues. I’m thinking of resorting to stealing to help fund my habit, but that means I will have to leave my beloved bathroom. My social life is completely gone and I think my cat may be dead since I haven’t left the bathroom for over two weeks. I just don’t know how much longer things can continue this way…