Can I have a Law named after me?

Actually, it’s a set of laws. I think I have been guilty of invoking them in the past, (especially the second one) before I realized how obnoxious it is. So for that, I offer my sincerest and humblest apologies.

Now, on to the good stuff:

Friedo’s First Law:
Asking a question about the general opinions of a group of people is stupid..

For example, if I were to say, “How to Belgians living in northern Argentina feel about US steel tarriffs?” that would be stupid. This happens occasionally in GQ. The reason this is so stupid, is because you can’t know the general opinions of a group of people unless you have a fairly large sample size, and you ask all of them, and you obey certain scientific laws for accurate surveying. Most people are not willing to go to all that trouble. And if you are willing to go to all that trouble, it will be hard, since 3.4% of Belgians living in northern Argentina will say they don’t like US steel tarriffs, 5.6% will say they like them, 4.9% will say they don’t give a rat’s ass, and the rest will look at you funny because they don’t speak English.

Friedo’s Second Law:
Anyone who responds to a question to which Friedo’s First Law will declare his own opinion to be the answer to the question at hand.

If, perchance, there is a Belgian who lived in northern Argentina and is a member of the SDMB, and thinks he knows something about US steel tarriffs, he will say:

While this may be one perfectly valid and interesting opinion, it in no way describes, remotely accurately, the general cultural attitude of said Belgians. This is because a “general cultural attitude” isn’t there. No such thing exists.

Friedo’s Third Law:
It’s not how big it is, it’s what you do with it.

Thank you and goodnight.

[sub]This is my last rant before I dismantle my computer and pack it up since I’m moving tomorrow. Woooooooo.[/sub]

Are you coming back after you move?

Of course! I just have to get some new internet stuff set up at my new place. But that doesn’t matter since I’ll be posting away when work is slow anyway.

** Darth Nader**'s commentary on Friedo’s Third Law:

If one feels the urge to delurk and say something witty, the server will timeout. Over and over again.

Argh… :stuck_out_tongue:

Nothing to add; just wanted to say that when I read this, I immediately thought, “How do you feel about the tow truck industry and why?”

Well, Friedo, whenever I see your name, I think of www.godhatesfundies.com – and I have immense respect for what you tried to do there, including particularly the biography of Phred Felps.