Can I make Chrome look exactly like IE9?

I want to install Chrome on the spousal unit’s computer, mostly for security purposes since our 3-year old is really the primary user right now, but she’s resistant because she’s always used IE. In fact, she got pissed at me when I finally updated her computer from IE8 to IE9 last week. I know it’s underhanded not to talk to her and try to convince her with a well-supported argument, but I’ve tried this in the past, and I don’t feel like having that conversation again. So is there a way with Chrome’s add-ons and themes and such to just make the change without her realizing it?
I’m vaguely aware of the process for changing the desktop and taskbar icons, which would be one part of it, but I’m talking about stuff like moving the browsing tabs from above the Omnibox to below it, making them square, and changing the back and forward buttons to match IE9’s appearance. Can I change the Start menu text so that one says “Internet Explorer 9” and the other simply says “Internet Explorer”? What about stuff like updates? I know that Google updates Chrome much more frequently than MS updates IE, so I don’t want the browser to give the game away by popping up with, “Update Chrome.” Basically, I want to have Chrome without any indication that I do.
So is this doable, or should I just suck it up and try talking to her again? Bonus points for any option that lets me avoid that, since I’m kinda pissed at her at the moment for an unrelated reason.

You could change the shortcut name and icon and then add one of these IE* themes to Chrome. I haven’t tried them myself because I have no interest but that should work. You might have to change the shortcut path so that it opens with the theme automatically but that is just a guess.

http://forum.gtricks.com/discussion/213/ie8-themes-for-google-chrome/p1

Chrome doesn’t tell you when it’s updating, which is actually one of my pet peeves.

And I’m not sure the themes will be close enough to do what you want, as there will still be obvious differences. Another direction you may want to go is to use Google Chrome Frame, which effectively runs the Chrome browser from inside of IE8. You’ll have to change some options to make it the default renderer, instead of just popping up when certain websites are loaded, but it’s not hard. Instructions are in the Administration link on the page I linked.

The only thing that may be different is the right-click menu.

(If you have a version of Windows that does not have a group policy editor, go here for information on the registry entry you’ll have to edit. Change it to 1.)