Assume you find an old lamp and rub it, as you would (just in case). It’s your “lucky” day, you’ve released a genie. Unfortunately you’re not going to get 3 wishes, this guy is offering you only 1.
He lays out the rules: your wish must be in English, it must be a maximum of 30 words and it must make full grammatical sense, no shortcuts.
You may not wish for more wishes or create any loophole that will give you more wishes.
The genie will be bound by your wish, he has to follow it to the letter and he cannot misunderstand. However he will actively try to misconstrue any clause which has any ambiguity at all in order to screw you over as badly as possible.
I’ve also heard, can’t wish for more wishes? Wish for more genies! Technically I think that falls under the loophole as well. But I’m not an expert on Genie Law.
Monkey’s Paw twist: (Team of lawyers show up at your door) Very sorry Velocity, but your entire extended family was wiped out in the worst industrial accident in history. Here is the largest settlement ever awarded.
It’s the “how”. Maybe the US treasury is illegally transferred into your account (with evidence that it was engineered by you), and suddenly you’re guilty of an enormous theft.
At which point the genie reaches into his(?) pantaloons pocket then hands you a 1 trillion Zimbabwe dollar note.
Here’s a pic of the real 100 trillion Z$ note:
At the time this note was circulating it was worth far less than one US penny. The Z$ has since been replaced but the notes are still out there.
At the exchange rates in effect right now today, the least valuable “dollar” is the Guyanese dollar at ~200 per USD. So your “trillion” is now US$5 billion. I’d still happily take that gift, but it’s not the same as you’d hoped for.
I wish: A vaccine for AIDS discovered. Let it be 100% effective, no side effects, freely available for all people, cheap to buy, widely publicized, within 10 days from now.
I want a device that will allow me to travel through time, both to the past, and to the future, bringing or taking back anything with me I wish-- a special bag may be supplied to guarantee items being carried with me, but I must be able to transport objects. Also, clothes I am wearing, and objects in my pockets, or that I can fairly be described as “wearing” will go with me. I must be able to specify the time, down to the minute, as well as the location, so that I can travel from Indiana in 2022 to Whitechapel, London, November, 1888 [specific date, time, and address would be supplied, but I don’t feel like looking them up now]. It must be a small device, such as a hand-held device, or something I can stand on, but pick up, fold and place in a pocket. I must be able to use it an infinite amount of times, and there will be no existential limits to my ability to interact with other people in either the past or the future-- or my present as defined by the time I encountered the genie. Oh-- the device must travel with me, and therefore be reusable.
The Genie will be much older than me and at this much longer than me, so I would not have the hubris to think I could beat him at his own trick, so I would pass.
Give me incredibly good luck, so I win any raffle, lottery, or any such contest I choose to enter but cannot be forced to enter any such against my will.
If the Genie is a complete jerk and it sounds like he would be. You can purchase it and then somehow lose it before getting the money. Iffy though, your wish might work.
