::Thras walks in::
“THE BEARS ARE NOT WORTHY TO LICK THE SWEAT FROM GILBERT BROWN’S CONSIDERABLE ASS!”
:Thras stands and waits patiently::
<wanders in, checks Thras’s post… wonders, “What the hell is a Gilbert Brown?”>
<checks espn.com, looks up Gilbert Brown…>
Dear God, that man’s big… six foot two, THREE HUNDRED THIRTY-NINE POUNDS!!! Holy crap, what does that guy eat for breakfast, small Milwaukee suburbs? Think I’m gonna have to start calling him Ghidra…
Oh, I’m sorry, Thras, in order to clear y’all of the misconception that the Puke… er, Pack, is going to win on Sunday – Favre better renew his Percodan prescription, 'cuz Urlacher and Colvin are gonna pound his ass so far into the turf that you’ll be able to use him as a golf tee. 
Since jarbabyj seems unwilling, how about you Zanshin? You wanna write 1,000 word post on how great the Pack are? Will I ever find a Bear fan to back up their talk?
And can you believe that he is only 339 lbs. because he went on a diet. At one point in time he was closer to 400 lbs.!
Colvin??? Rosevelt Colvin??? Let’s see . . .
::Thras now has to consult ESPN.com::
Mr. Colvin in his 3rd year out of Purdue currently averages 4 tackles per game, 1 forced fumble, 0 interceptions and 4.5 sacks for the season. Oh, yeah. I am sure that Mike Sherman has had nothing but sleepless nights trying to game plan around such a defensive powerhouse. :rolleyes:
Uh huh. And who exactly is leading the NFL in sacks so far? Why that would be KGB. 
Man, I’m surprised there are so many Packer fans who’re smart enough to figure out how that funny little box with the keyboard and TV set attached work…
KIDDING! JUST KIDDING!
Thras – 400 pounds? Holy crap! It amazes me that a football player can get that massive. <shaking head> And I’m sure you’re not scared of Rosie, but Urlacher… man, I sure wouldn’t want that guy coming after me. 
beagledave – Honestly, I ain’t watched the Pack much this year, so haven’t kept up on your players. All smack-talking aside, I think he’s gonna have a tough time with the Bears offensive line - those guys are fraggin’ monsters. And if you wanna beat up one quarterback – s’alright, we’ve got another.
Hamlet – Thousand word essay? You’re on. (And I’ll expect one from you, posted in MPSIMS, if the beloved Bear wins.)
Anecdotal story… I grew up in a little town just south of the Illinois/Wisconsin border. As you can probably guess, living in Illinois and still being that close to the border (and having to listen to the Packers fan rave every year), the residents are largely die-hard Bears fans and hate the Pack with a passion. About five years ago, a Packers fan made the mistake of walking into a Bears-dominated bar after an afternoon of watching the Bears get absolutely creamed by the Pack, and shot his mouth off about the general lack of talent, sexual preferences, personal hygiene and dubious parentage of the Bears and their fans.
He ended up stripped to his boxers, and duct-taped to a stop sign in the February weather with a cardboard sign reading “PACKERS FAN” around his neck.
(At the time, I worked in Milwaukee. The next Monday, I walked into work and everyone at the office, hearing of the incident, looked at me with horror and gasped, “Holy COW, you guys are ANIMALS down there!”)
Nope, that would be Michael Strahan with 14. KGB has 10.
Oh fuck you and your “I’m gonna muddy the waters of a perfectly good pissing match by correcting the stats”
At one point in the season, KGB was mentioned as leading the league…I stand corrected as to the current standings.
Well, hey ‘dere! So the Packers and da Bears this weekend, hey? C’meer and I’ll tell youse what I think is gonna happen. Oh yea, yea, the Packers are gonna win this one hands down. I guess I should first say I’m from M’waukee, not up ‘nort in Wiscahhhsin, but I still root for the Pack of course. Oh yea, the old Green and Gold. We’re gonna have ourselves a big cook-out with the neighbors sunday. We’re going to go down by where Schusters used to be and have a good time. You know, some beers, some brats and a big ole’ cheese plate of course. Looks like we have some cheddar, some brick and some Colby, this week, nice selection. Hey Betty, who was supposed to bring the raw beef and onions?? Borrow me a quarter and I’ll call my brother and tell him to pick some up at the PDQ.
First we got that Brett Favre, he’s the best quarterback in the league, doncha know. I just know he’ll trow himself a couple-two-tree touchdowns on Sunday, hey? That new guy running the ball is pretty good too, Green. No, not as good as Jimmy Taylor from the Glory Years of course, but he’s pretty good. Da Bears? Cripes sake, how’d they get to be 6 and 1?? Jeez….
Course one thing I don’t like is all these ex-Bears we have, Theirry, Flanagan, and that front office guy too. Jeez, it was bad enough when they brought in the McMahon guy, but now. Let me tell ya’, I don’t think we need those Bears on this team. Believe you me, Vince wouldn’t like that, he wouldn’t have done that to us.
Oh, all this talking is makin’ me tirsty, gotta stop at the bubbler over ‘dere once. Well, gotta go, the brats and wieners look like they’re about done. Hey Ole, can you get me another Blatz there???
Years and years ago, I prosecuted a stockade sodomy court martial. The lead witness was testifying under a limited grant of immunity given by the post commander because, while the lead witness was a willing participants in the event of buggery, we really wanted to do a job on the defendant. During the preliminary hearing (Article 32 hearing) the witness was asked to describe what had happened to him. The answer was that the defendant had packed the witnesses shit. Not understanding the answer, I asked it again. “He packed my shit,” said the witness. The answer sank in. Light bulbs lit up. The hearing broke up in unseemly giggling.
From then on the Judge Advocate Section’s team in all on-post intermural sports was “The Packers.”
This is not meant as a reflection on that fine professional football team from my sister State of Wisconsin.
Here is my prediction, my friends, for dat team whos city starts wit a “c” ends wit an “o” and has “hicag” in da middle. Da Bearz offense will strugle without Da Coach on the sidelines and their D will suffer too. Final score: Da Bearz 247 Packers 2.
More rational forces are weighing in on the upcoming game. Dr. Z (of CNNSI.com) sees the world properly and picks the Packers.
[/tangentially related hijack]
For anyone that still doubts John Madden has the IQ of a hamster please read this article in which he discusses the resurgent Bears.
Here is a little taste:
If someone can explain this man to me I would appreciate it.
[/tangentially related hijack]
<,jarbaby>
It’s kinda hard for John to sound coherant when he has Brett’s home grown, vicoden buzzed, hooker scarred, Mississippi schlong deep in his throat.
</jarbaby>
I think the only way anyone can explain John Madden these days is that he took one too many shots to the dome back in his playing days. John, you were amusing and entertaining ten years ago… but for the love of God, please STOP!
::Stands and applauds Beagledave’s imitation::
Zanshin . . . AMEN TO THAT BRUDDA!
I just got an e-mail from a friend of mine who works in Chicago extolling the virtues of James Allen. (225 yards rushing and one touchdown and 24 receptions for 160 yards and one touchdown) That would make him about the 5th most productive offensive threat on the Packers roster (as opposed to probably being #3 for the Bears behind Thomas and Booker). Please, will everyone in the metropolitan Chicago area that sees their Bears as an immensely talented team catch a fucking clue!
Aw, hell, don’t take your friend as indicative of Bears fans in general. (Just like I don’t take beagledave as indicative of Packers fans. ;)) James Allen’s good, I’ll grant him that, but the guy’s got no second gear whatsoever. He’s a good utility back for certain situations, but he just doesn’t have the talent to be a good, solid, dependable back.
Now let’s see Anthony Thomas’ stats at this time next year… then we’ll talk about an offensive threat! (Average of five point one yards per carry… makes me happy when skies are gray.)
The Bears have such a pretty stadium, too.
At least we don’t have PETA on our case about our team name.
[sub]not a sports fan, but a smack talking fan[/sub]
Up yours. Why can’t we be happy with our team. I’ve actually watched them play every game this year, and they are pretty talented. Are we the best in the league? No. Are we perfect? No. But are we a pretty good team that is young and will only improve? Hell Yes!!!
We beat the ever-loving shit out of Atlanta and Cinicinnati on the road. We shut out a Cincinnatti team that had scored over thirty against the much lauded Baltimore defense. Sure, Atlanta isn’t great, but we beat the holy hell out of them. We took their first QB out of the game, and spent the rest of the game beating up on their second QB. We won those games by a combined score of 55-3! I grant you that they aren’t elite teams, but they definitely are decent teams. It wouldn’t be possible to watch those two games and conclude that the Bears are anything other than a pretty damned talented team.
The Packers have had our number for a few years, I grant you, but that doesn’t mean a thing. That was then, this is now. I mean the Packers were a non-entity for like 20 years before their current streak. That bad stretch had to end, right? Well, our bad stretch has ended pal, and you had better come to grips with the fact that this is not last years Bears team, or you’re going to be sorely disappointed come Sunday.
GO BEARS!!!
Well I’m not much of a smack talker, but I am a Packer fan and a Bear-hater. I can’t write poems like Hamlet(Dude, how long did that take you?) It looks like the Bears are a good team this year. With the game in Chciago it should be a good one. I’ve always liked Jim Miller and can’t believe he can’t stick wherever he goes. I’m kind of happy they’ve come around, a bit bittersweet actually, because now we’ve got the best rivalry in pro sports hot and heavy again. It really sucked when the Pack was getting beat back in the 80’s, even though they were close and competitive games. And I’ve actually felt sorry for the Bears the last few years when we’ve beaten the crap out of them. There were some days where I didn’t even bother watching because it wasn’t going to be exciting. Now I and most of us are really looking forward to it.
Yea, it’s still a long season and now the Bears are playing some inter-conference games so this should show how good they are. 3 games or whatever that Anthony Thomas(?) has played is a bit premature to be comparing him to Sayers. I still think the Pack will win though.
The smart money is on “yes.”
-Myron
Owatonna, MN