No big deal, really. Just harmless fun.
Wait, was it my desk? That’s it, you’re f*cking fired!
Just kidding - I guess.
But, is it really any of the security guards business? No one’s stealing anything. No one’s breaking and entering. Harmless action between to adults.
Why is it ok to take a nasty dump at work but, sex is verbotten?
One of my supervisors at a hotel/casino got caught by security on her knees with her dealer boyfriend on the roof of one of the hotel towers. They were caught because as soon as they opened the door onto the rooftop it tripped a silent security alarm.
Whenever someone brought it up she would laugh and say it wasnt true. Right 
Well, for one thing not having sex wont kill you. Not being able to eliminate bodily waste will.
HAVE YOU EVER HAD BLUE BALLS!!! C’MON!!!
I mean, we had a president who received BJs in the Oval Office! This guy (Clinton) was so unfazed that he lied about it.
So, it is every American’s right to have sex wherever he wants it! 
I think some things have to be assumed. Like no drinking at lunch, no smoking in the boys room, no porn surfing, no sex during work hours…etc.
It would probably fall under some clause regarding inappropriate work habits, lack of production, ineffective use of time or something like that.
Clearly they must give a nice name to the reason for firing... probably ineffective use of time. (Which is contradictory... I think its great use of time. hehe) They won't be fired for the sex itself...Are you sure about that?
Places where I’ve worked these things have been expressly prohibited (eg being intoxicated while at work, ‘no smoking’ bylaws, use of technology rules etc).
I could see ‘Tresspassing,’ a catch-all that you can arrest someone for if they’re doing something they shouldn’t, on private property. But that’s a criminal offense, not a violation of work rules.
Harmless, my ass. It may seem like harmless fun if nobody else is around… until there is someone else around, and that person files a $10,000,000 lawsuit for sexual harassment, claiming that her coworkers humping created an “oppressive work environment” or some such thing. Don’t laugh, it happens.
Possibly, but a single instance generally isn’t going to rise to the level of a hostile work environment. They’d have to show the the employer actually knew or should have known about the conduct, it was an ongoing problem, and they failed to take remedial steps to correct the situation. If it was an ongoing problem and had interfered with a co-worker’s job performance in the past I could see it, but I don’t know of a case where someone successfully claimed a hostile work environment because two co-worker’s were caught boinking in the office at one in the morning.