Check out time

Just wondering, if you were going to commit suicide, what method would you choose?

I posted this in the Pit to avoid offending some of the more sensitive folk. If the moderators or an overwhelming majority consider this topic too morbid, dangerous, irresponsible, tasteless, etc., please close/delete it immediately.

Yes I know suicide is not something to be discussed lightly. Yes, I know anyone considering suicide should seek assistance immediately. I’m sorry if this thread offends anyone who has lost loved ones to suicide. No, I am not contemplating suicide. But I neverthess find the available methods of some interest.

I see a couple of big problems with any method. Perhaps main among them is that I don’t dislike anyone enough to make them have to find my body. That would be my family or friends if I went in the privacy of my home, or strangers should I jump off a building, drown, or dive under a train.

Then there is the problem of acquiring the needed materials. Shoot myself? Sorry, no gun. Barbituates? Don’t I need a prescription or something?

Then another problem I see is actually bringing myself to do it. The idea of intentionally cutting myself I cannot imagine. Could I pull the trigger if I had a gun? If I chose pills or carbon monoxide, what would it be like waiting for it to take effect? The idea of the fall off a building probably scares me more than the result.

My guess would be that I’d want it to be pretty fast, and pretty certain. So I’d probably get stumbling drunk and jump in front of a train. I think the Hemlock Society recommends alcohol, barbituates, and a plastic bag.

How bout you? Pick your poison.

You might want to see if you can find the FAQ for the old usenet group (or, I forget). The FAQ talks about the pros and cons of the various methods, and includes such useful information as required dosages for a given chemical and body weight, and the minimum drop required to break the neck in a hanging.

The thing that really that really stuck with me is how hard it really is to kill a healthy human being. None of the methods are foolproof, and most are extremely painful.

While this is morbid (and I also apologize in advance to anyone who has lost someone to suicide), the knowledge of exactly how difficult it really is to kill oneself may have carried me through a couple of dark times. Cheered my up a little, anyway.

Cheered my up a little, anyway.
Err, in my darker and more melodramtic days, I mean. I’m much better, now.

Nuke. Definitely a nuke.

if I’m willing to kill myself, I’ll not give a rat’s ass who else I take out. But that’s just me.

(Bashere, is it? As in Davram? there’s an Asmodean around here somewhere as well.)

Well, when I actually did try it I generally used lots of alcohol and pills. The alcohol lets you be a selfish bastard and not think about the consequences, and the pills, well, mixed with alcohol. The only problem, was that I didn’t have enough of anything. I ended up taking valium, IB profin (big ole 1500 mg pills), and sleeping pills. When I was still semi-consious I realised that I wasn’t dying so I started looking for other ones, the only ones I could find were zinc pills, so yes I gobbled handfulls of zinc pills and some vitamin E. Don’t ask me why I took the E, it just came to me. Needless to say, I did not die, I passed out face down on my kitchen floor, and felt very sick for the next two days.

In retrospect I think it’s a pretty funny story.

(andros, the same. Thank you for noticing, btw).

I have known 3 people who tried, unsuccessfully (aspirin, quualudes, and ex-lax, attempted overdoses in each case, with a trip to the emergency room thrown in), and one who succeeded ( twelve gauge to the head, with the oven open and the gas turned on, for back up, I guess ).

My friends and I talked about it a long time again, and decided that hari-kari ( or sepico?) was the way to go. If you wanted to off yourself so badly that you were willing to go that route, who could blame you. Needless to say, none of us tried it.

Like Dinsdale, I’ve given some thought to this as a purely theoretical exercise. (Actually, I’ve come at it from the perspective that the deterioration and dependence that inevitably results from old age is best avoided.)

Probably the best option for all concerned is to grab some scuba gear, strap on a tank and an extra 20 pounds of weight or so, and head for some nice, deep ocean. As you descend below about 150 ft., nitrogen levels in the blood increase quickly, bringing on a pleasant feeling of intoxication. Eventually, you’ll lose consciousness (it’s exactly like drifting off to sleep on anaesthesia at the doctor’s office), sink to the bottom, and asphyxiate without ever realizing it. As a bonus, your body will help feed the fish, and you won’t have to worry about little Johnny coming home to find mom or dad’s corpse sprawled out somewhere.

Of course, your heirs may owe the scuba shop a few bucks for the tank that never got returned, but what do you care? You’re dead.

** Oldscratch **

Umm…I don’t know what to say.
Well, i do, I just don’t know if I should say it.

Oh God, please don’t hate me…

I thought your story was funny. Please forgive me, I laughed until my face hurt.
I wondered if the attempt had any beneficial qualities to it from all the healthy vitamins.

I’m sorry i laughed, even though you admitted it was funny.

Maybe a person has to have been there.

I would also like to echo those who stated just how incredibly difficult it is to kill a human being.
I have even heard about suicide attempts where the person shot himself in the head and did not die- or maybe the person telling me this was just trying to scare me.
Nevertheless, it is true- it’s really hard to die.

I have never tried this, but the carbon monoxide way- in the running car in a garage- that seems more painless than the others, but there are probably some flaws with that I can’t think of.

And ** Dinsdale **-
You really are ok, right? There’s no way for me to tell, even if you reassure me, and I’m worried. I know that people who think about it talk about it a lot.

I think it’s better for me to ask and have you laugh at me for being a worrywart than to just dismiss this and then have you dead, thanks to our help.

PLEEEEZE do try this…it sucks if you fail in your attempt, and if you succeed- it still sucks.

It’s ok. I wouldn’t post it if I couldn’t laugh about it. It would have been funnier if you could actually see me. Staggering around, blitzed out of my mind, fumbling with child proof locks. and the next morning, when I woke up, I just felt really stupid.
ooooh ooohh. It’s my 2300d post in the 43000th thread. Coincidence? I think not.

That’s funny, it’s how I always picture you…I’m glad your attempt failed, it’s very nice having you around.

Thanks for your concern.
Direct your efforts towards something you can have some influence on.
Why the fuck ask for reassurance and then say nothing I say can reassure you. See, I can still type with the barrel in my mouth and pull the trigger with my t

Oh crap.

I guess that was my fault for not taking him seriously.
Can I have your cd’s?


OK, who want’s to head over to MPSIMS and start a funeral for Dinsdale.

Why is it that most times when I see a Pit thread I have a response to, it’s always turned into a circus by the time I get to it?

Freezing to death. That’s the only way to go.

Like the performance artist in China. The one who melted a block of ice using his own body heat, at the same time killing him. Pretty cool, I think the movie is called “Frozen”

I think I’d do an Anna Karenina on the Lex at about 8:00 AM on a Monday.

No particular reason – it’s just if I’m going to go, Ukulele Ike and Saxface ought to at least a get a “Goddam Subway” Pit thread out of it.

Who are you people?!
Who is Dinsdale?!
Who’s gonna clean this up?!

If you wanted to make it as miserable as possible, marry Rosie Wolf.

Fletch, if you want to flame RW, go to the appropriate thread. Don’t start shit in this thread.

For the Straight Dope

Now there’s a method I hadn’t considered … pissing Lynn off.

But really… I’d pick freezing to death and here in the great white north opportunity for this method abounds for many months of the year.