Another One for smith537

The BBQ Pit
1

I’ve never pitted another Doper before. Never felt like I’ve had enough ire to do so or really enough cause.

Until now.

And I hope that anyone here that knows me realizes exactly how pissed off this means I have to be. :mad:

So, without further ado…

There’s a discussion going on about suicide in this thread. Now unfortunately, due to my own insanity issues, I’m usually drawn to posting on this topic. Yeah, I know, tis probably a bad idea. Regardless, if it helps anyone to not feel alone, yadda, yadda, yadda.

Well unfortunately, I came across msmith537 who also happens to be in attendance. He’s first post was thus:

Which was an answer to why killing one’s self is bad.

Hmmm.
I understand we all can’t keep up with each other on this massive board and who has what going on. However, I couldn’t quite wrap my mind around the fact that someone who’s been here for almost 6 years hadn’t heard many a desperate, despondent member relating their shit-for-a-life existence. I’m sure by lots of standards, my problems pale in comparison, so I mentioned the above.

Which I’m sure it wouldn’t have taken any effort whatsoever to provide links to same if that was what was needed.

My response?

And his words of wisdom to that?

… that leads me here.

Therefore, all I’ve got left to add (sense I believe the clueless callousness speaks for itself) is that

[ol]
[li]you ain’t got no friggin’ idea what the fuck you’re talking about[/li][li]it doesn’t make a damn bit of difference what one person can do versus the other (and I can give examples, if you like)[/li][li]I wasn’t necessarily even talking about myself.[/li][/ol]

Lastly, you can wrap your feeble mind around the concept that those in the severe position of wanting to end their life could say the same stupid ass thing to you don’t you?

Lemme see how that’d go then.

Oh well boo hoo. No matter the fact that someone you know committed suicide, there are plenty of people with that same problems who somehow manage to deal with it. Is that what we should say in return?

Willful (?) prick.

[Note: Those are posts #20, 30 and 35 respectively.]

2

I agree with you.

3

He’s a dick. Always has been, and looks like he always will be.

4

Callousness and cluelessness are msmith’s best and brightest contributions to the world. This is how he deals with just about any subject, I wouldn’t let it bother me too much.

Must not be too much fun to process life as a robot.

5

There is another situation in which suicide is completely understandable, even if not accepted by society: quality of life.
Person has a terminal illness, beyond cure or even remission. All the doctors can do is “make person comfortable” but person will have no life to speak of. Some people cannot tolerate this situation.
or
Person has been in a disfiguring accident. For every Christopher Reeves there are dozens of Ken Harrisons
Lastly, if you’ve never experienced true clinical depression, you cannot possibly imagine the despair that accompanies it.
So, yes, I agree with you and then some

6

I’ve had clinical depression since I was about 7, and wasn’t diagnosed until 16. I didn’t really start getting valuable help until I was 23, after a full-blown nervous breakdown sent me to the hospital. There are no words to explain the feelings of hopelessness and despair when you’re suicidal. When depression gets that bad, suicide appears to be the only out you’ve got.

Only after the right meds and therapy did I realize that no, it’s not the answer. The pain I would have put my family through would have dwarfed the problems I was having. This is coming from someone who’s been on both sides of the spectrum: Killing yourself is not the answer.

However, I really don’t like msmith537’s “just deal with it” mindset, as if it’s the same kind of problem as being stucl in traffic and late for work. Has he ever had to “deal with it”?? Think of it from a standpoint of emotional chemotherapy. It takes a lot of time, resources, will, and courage to come out of serious depression. It’s not a case of take-a-magic-pill-a-day-and-all-your-problems-go-away. He needs to learn basic human compassion.

7

the “just deal with it” folks are the same ones who tell the morbidly obese to “just stop eating”. It’s sad that there are people who have no sympathy for the addicted or mentally ill.

8

I appreciate that you guys understand where I’m coming from. As my blood pressure begins to drop a little, I must say I’m very obliged. Thank you.

Regardless of whether dipshit has ever had mental problems himself isn’t the issue. Any idiot can figure out that if someone could just ‘snap out of it,’ they would. And it definitely shows his typical lack of knowledge about the less than stellar fact of psychiatry being less than exact. I won’t go into my own personal situation (if anyone is interested, just search my name, is all over the boards), but suffice it that sometimes doing Every. Fuck. Thing. you’re told to for as long as you live doesn’t necessarily make any bit of it better, or even tolerable for that matter.

I agree that overall suicide is not the answer. However, it may be the best thing some folks feel is out there and expecting your loved ones to always hold you in sway isn’t going to do the trick either. If there is no relief/solution, occasionally one can’t hold out forever.

Which is all I was asking anyway.

(Thanks mods for taking care of my other thread.)

9

And I hope their crotches rot from herpes! :mad:

10

smith537 continues to show an inability to use his imagination. If it doesn’t exist behind his own eyelids, then it doesn’t exist at all.

faithfool, I hope that you can find some relief in knowing that you will never be shallow and unfeeling like that.

11

That msmith357 is blunt and often obtuse is a given. Especially to anyone that has been around since '99.

I’ve dealt with my own issues of depression and even suicidal ideation, and while msmith357 isn’t one to pad his arguments, this is, in my opinion, a weak fucking pitting.

One thing that he has absolutely right is that suicide is unequivocably unacceptable for 99.99999% of the population. If you want to make some sort of deal about euthenasia with terminal illnesses, I’ll grant you some gray area there, but for an otherwise healthy, severly depressed 19 year old woman, it’s completely unacceptable. I have a great deal of compassion for people with depression, it’s not something which I would wish upon anybody. We need to do our best to help these individuals with whatever means available from social support to advanced psychopharmacology to help alleviate their depression, but suicide, again, is not an acceptable answer.

On the contrary, you’re the sick fuck suggesting that perhaps a 20 year old really has seen enough of life and pursued every course of possible treatment that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if they killed themselves. In fact, you suggest that we should feel guilty for preventing people from killing themselves.

I wish I had known about the thread and taken the opportunity to pit you first, really.

12

Yeah, we need to do our best to help these people in whatever way they can get, right? Well listen, to someone who feels a little more than empathy or compassion for those that are depressed (severly or otherwise), sometimes you can’t get help.

Let me repeat that again in case you’re hard of hearing.

SOMETIMES, YOU CANNOT GET HELP.

You might ask how. F’instance, in the case of a person who in 64 years of dealing with mental illness still isn’t any better. Ya know, after the four billion different medications/doctors/specialists/therapies and treatments. Someone who solely stuck around for someone like you. FOR YOUR BENEFIT, so you are the sick fuck. I don’t think I figure that prominently in another adult’s choices. I suppose I believe a little humility and compassion is in order. Apparently, the voices in your head tell you otherwise.

Another person’s pain, be them 19 or 99 is none of your fucking business. Perhaps in that case, the parents didn’t feel it prudent to come forward and say something (possibly) along the lines of “Oh, she might have been tired of us both molesting her every night.” Or there could have been any number of reasons that they didn’t even know about and you people are too stupid to guess. I’m glad in happy play land that you all can handle whatever comes your way, no matter how big, but in reality, some people can’t.

Gee, maybe it’s y’all who should learn to deal with it.

Don’t put words in my mouth. I wanted to know WHEN WAS ENOUGH, for the zillion goddamn time. So, in your humble estimation, 19 was too young. Hmm. Maybe 39 would have been better. After a husband, a couple of kids, lots of co-workers and friends could be involved and devastated.

I’m saying YOU DO NOT KNOW. You have no idea what she’s seen. Stretch your apparently weak imagination a bit and just look to any number of true stories. The people who ‘go bad’ so to speak, from things they encountered that was too harsh to put an adult through, let alone a child.

So if you and mssmith don’t get it, I’m not in the least surprised. It takes just a bit of sense to comprehend something so innate and simple.

I’m here now bitch. Your jump.

[/QUOTE]

13

Whoops, I forgot you Zoe. Sorry. I think I got just a wee bit distracted.

So…
Thank you for being my own SDMB angel. :slight_smile:

14

No one, least of all the OP is suggesting that suicide is “acceptable”. What she is saying is that for some, the pain that leads to it is understandable. There’s a difference.

She’s not pitting the what, or the why, but the HOW of what the moron is saying. Also, I see nowhere where she or anyone else states that iit IS acceptable. What she does is ask a reasonable question (which of course msmithdodges with more idiocy and never addresses). And that question is, what IS a person supposed to do with a lifetime of agony? When IS enough enough?

Those are reasonable questions.

While not acceptable, sometimes the pain makes it inevitable. The problem is not that msmith is discussing, as you are, that it’s an unacceptable choice, and it’s not even really so much that he’s doing it in such a brutal rude way.

The problem is that he doesn’t have any idea of the medical reasons, such as chemical imbalances, behind the depression and pain. And so because he doesn’t understand it, or believe that it’s a valid problem, he dismissies it in a “snap out of it” way. Stupid and rude.

But then, as you have said, he’s been pitted many times for those lovely “attributes”.

15

Actually, he is. Let me help you out:

This, to me, seems like a rather clear argument that, at some point, we should just let suicidal people go ahead and kill themselves. That argument makes me want to vomit, but think whatever you want because it’s a chance to get in some shots at everyone’s favorite bad-boy that we all love to hate: msmisth357.

Actually, no, he doesn’t make this argument. He clearly defines several different groups of suicidal people, you’ve got your Dateless Wonders, Jobless Losers, Drama Queens, followed by the severly depressed. Which, horrors of horrors, he suggests, “there’s help for that.” Which there is. Some individuals are refractory to it, and this is a complex set of issues, but at no point does he suggest snapping out of anything.

Glib and insensitive? Yes. What we’ve come to expect from him yes? Deserving of a pitting? Hardly.

16

First, I’m a she. Second, I couldn’t care less whether or not your insensitive reaction to my questions make you want to vomit. Third, I’m really thrilled that you think people shouldn’t have control over their bodies and decisions because, apparently, you think so.

Just wow.

I’ve never thought I factor that much in someone else’s life or death issues. Project your own importance much?

Lastly, if you think this is a lame pitting, you’re certainly entitled. I never said it was a big deal. However, as someone who deals with the effects of those kinds of stupid fucking attitudes on a daily damn basis, let me say it does bother me. And I’ve always hoped that with patience, kindness and information the stigma, etc. could be fought.

This has made me re-think that position. Apparently, in some cases, people prefer ignorance and knee-jerk sensibilities.

You can have them.

But I can tell you to happily fuck off.

17

Don’t fall into the trap of suggesting that a car breakdown is no problem because you can just drive to the nearest garage.

18

The car breakdown is only a problem if you don’t take care of it when it is less serious, thus letting the damage get worse and worse.

19

Not my importance, society’s. And when it comes to suicide, yes, I think a little social intervention is called for.

If you’re pitting people that are dismissive of depression, I’m all behind you. msmith357 may be brusque, but did he deserve a personal pitting for his actual post content? No. I’ll admit that I came out very strongly against you in this thread because it seems very clear to me that you’re saying that suicide should be on the table. I don’t think that’s a reasonable view, although that’s back to the original thread.

Again, I know that you’ve dealt with this struggle personally before, and I’m sorry, I’m truly sorry. I’ve experiened some part of that hell, but I also know that I’ve only skipped through the first circle of what a hell that can be. You have my best wishes, but I absolutely cannot condone leaving suicide on the table as a possible option. I’ll talk more if you’d like me too.

20

Let’s not take this car metaphor too far.