I have a hot palate. I put Tabasco on nearly everything I eat, I regularly eat madrases, vindaloos, I munch jalapeños like they’re potato chips, I love Thai curries, mouse-shit peppers, chilli sauce on kebabs - I even have a small collection of hot sauces that can strip the patina off copper coins.
But I have a problem: if I eat a substantial amount of hot food, when it gets into my lower intestine, it cripples me. I find myself in physical agony. I am unable to function: I get dizzy and have to sit down, and I become highly irritable. My entire body aches, from my stomach, all the way down my legs. The only thing I can compare the pain with is being kicked in the balls. It’s even made me late for work on occasion, since I have to lie down until I’ve passed the irritant.
I’ve got some form of IBS, and as a consequence I’ve had lots of scans and even colonoscopies, and there’s nothing unusual whatsoever about my large intestine - no ulcers, nothing.
I’m getting worried that to avoid this situation I’m going to have to curtail my hot food delights, and that would make me very sad. I just want to know - does anyone else ever get this? Or am I totally alone?
No help for your problem, but a word of advice on another matter. If you prepare habanero chilis, be sure to wash your hands extremely well before you use the toilet. Better yet, use plastic gloves when you’re preparing the chilis. I can’t speak from personal experience, of the pain involved in touching one’s member after handling habaneros; but I’ve read accounts of it on SDMB and it doesn’t sound at all pleasant.
Capsaicin is not digested. Therefore, it passes through your body in the same strenght as it enters. Generally, most of the digestive system is less susceptable to it than the mouth, so once you’re swallowed you’re past the worst. But in specific situations, particularly an ongoing condition, it can cause problem like th eOP described.
Count yourself lucky. I know people who’ve had IBS force them to give up all alcohol, dairy products, fatty meats, …
jjimm, I have the same problem… however, I’ve found that the bowel irritation is much worse when I consume the seeds of the chiles.
And a lot of super hot sauces will add the ground seed of the chile, because they are very high in capsaicin. I suspect that they also have another compound which is actually causing your intestinal distress.
The only other time I have problems with spicy foods is when I eat them with way too much fat or grease, and I get the “ring of fire” effect. (Apologies to Johnny Cash.)
Try this: get a mess of your favorite, spiciest pickled jalepeno or habanero chiles. Deseed them. Eat. Wait. Do not eat anything else spicy until the chiles have passed.
I believe there’s a very old thread here where a female doper described her first experience of being, ahem… manipulated, by her boyfriend who had a trace of Dave’s Insanity Sauce (or some such) on his fingers.
Wow, I needs to find me a girl like that. I routinely eat spicy foods, and I always wash my hands really well (generally I soap and rise at least three times right after eating, and then once when I get home.) And one time, I guess I didn’t wash quite good enough after a plate of wings…her screams were heard for miles. And since it’s not always easy to tell screams of pain from screams of pleasure through layers of drywall, my roommates thought I was doing quite well for myself
LOL she must have been quite the sheltered delicate flower, in that situation you would have thought there was a platoon of marines expressing their displeasure very vocally…I can swear like you would not believe when I experience an unexpected pain…I would not have sounded like i was having anything close to fun!
I had a similar situation, which ended up with her tackling the problem with a cold shower. It was the first time I’d seen her so intimate with bathroom plumbing…well, umm, we both ended up enjoying it. Eventually.
Just tonight I heard an ad on TV for a new Trojan product - warming condoms (“You can both enjoy the sensation!”) I suppose you could get the same effect with a drop or two of your favourite hot sauce. Maybe you should dilute it first.
A tip for future reference. Capsaicin is not soluble in water, so the shower isn’t going to be very effective.
However, capsaicin is very soluble in fat and alcohol (that’s why sour cream and margaritas go so well with mexican food)… so if she ever gets the buffalo wing burn again, use some cocoa butter or lanolin… or just rinse with a beer.
Not to hijack the thread, but I’ve always wondered why it’s your lower colon that freaks out so bad. 5-10 minutes before you really have to go, you get this overwhelming wave of nausea. But why only then? Why not the whole way through your intestines? What would be the evolutionary reasoning for its making you sick right before it comes out?
