Morally I would not use any site that attempts to exclude gays regardless of how many hoops you have to jump through. I don`t think there would be a legal problem because unfortunately being gay isn’t as highly protected a class as sex or religion or race in the US.
But that’s sort of the point, I don`t believe any of these sites goes beyond actually discriminating against gays. You won’t find similar roadblocks to keep you from messaging blacks or jews or gentiles, etc. or participating in a site designed for specific people.
That doesn’t make the anti-gay angle at all ok, I’m just making the point that I don’t believe the actual discrimination, such as it is, extends beyond sexuality. Everything else these sites do is just marketing and attempting to reach a specific niche without any actual inhibitions on people outside that niche joining.
Things are allowed to exist that do discriminate, tho. Nobody can stop you from starting a Things Only Atop Staircases store because people in wheelchairs can’t shop there if you can prove that your business model depends on things being atop staircases. If you must, you can hire just men to push buttons in your factory if your factory’s buttons must be pushed by penises only.
I don’t have the right to waltz into the men’s locker room, or demand that a Web site for deaf people add “I can hear just fine” as an option in a signup form that asks about the extent of your hearing loss.
The business model for this Web site depends on people who are Christians looking for other Christians to date. If they were forced to allow everyone (and by “allow” I mean add “atheist” as an option in a dropdown) to use the site, their business model would fail because they’d no longer be a niche site they’d just be another dating site.
And I don’t think it’s “refusal of service” if they don’t happen to provide the particular service you’re interested in. They’re not refusing you based on who or what you are, they just don’t carry the “goods” you’re shopping for.
If you, a vegetarian, go to a steakhouse and find that they don’t have any vegetarian entrees on the menu, I wouldn’t consider that “refusal of service.”
I am a gay male and it doesn’t bother me. Why would you want to force yourself into some “club” that doesn’t want you anyway. It’s one thing if it’s a job. I mean a job is a way to earn money to live. But a club is just a club.
If it’s a club for straight Christians, why shouldn’t they limit themselves. I mean if I am a homosexual Muslim, I’m only gonna frustrate the people who are in the club by having them waste their time on me.
This sort of site seems to me to be intended to be used by people who just want to only consider dating christians/jews/blacks/whites/women/men/whatever. You can’t compel people to date people they’re not interested in, and you shouldn’t. As far as I’m concerned, the law should have no say in this.
[minor hijack]My first awareness of Christian Mingle was seeing ads for it on the Chiller Channel while I was watching Buffy. It was a bit of a disconnect, because I wouldn’t have thought Buffy, or horror movies, would constitute the prime demographic for a Christian dating service[/mh]
I’m totally stunned that this is the first post to point out that ‘discrimination’ can exist within a certain context, legally. Has everybody’s brain gone soft, or something?
If you want to know how somebody can do something without bringing the law down on themselves, it helps to know what the law says.
Find out the provisions of the law, and you will find all the answers you need.
There are some situations in which one may freely discriminate against every protected class. This has been rehashed for about the last 50 years, hasn’t it?
Why did it take this long for somebody to answer the question?
BTW, ‘discrimination’ is not illegal. Violating X codicil of X ‘equal rights’ law is illegal.
That simple.
In short, whatever title it is in the US law that prohibits ‘discrimination’ doesn’t force compliance if the fundamental character of the organization is changed by compliance. Usual disclaimers, IANAL. Now, your view of a Christian may be to allow same sex dating and marriage, but Christian Mingle doesn’t believe that way. In fact, they say that married people should not be on the site looking for the new replacement.
IF this were true, then why does nearly every Christian website let you choose to say you are non-Christian? Why does JDate include a non-Jewish option?
I have no problem believing there is an exception like you say, but the way these places act, it seems like there really isn’t. At least, not one that’s so clear cut that they are sure they fall on the right side of it.
Though I would be interested in getting some actual legal Dopers in here.
Because they are a business operating under state and federal laws regarding protected classes like race, age, religion and sexual orientation. There are limited exceptions, but I don’t think they apply to matchmaking services.
Vegetarians are not in a legally protected class because their food preferences. Gays and atheists are, because of their sexual or religious preferences. If vegetarians feel discriminated against, they are free to lobby to get the law to recognize them as a protected class, but until that happens, that they haven’t got a leg to stand on.
Actually, the fact that a dating site ostensibly for devout Christians not having M/M or F/F options doesn’t surprise me a bit.
If it were the only dating site in existence and it eliminated gays, I could see getting upset about it. But this site’s targeting a demographic not exactly known for its tolerance for gays, and there are dating sites for gays so it’s not as if they’re being denied a chance to use online dating if they want. They just can’t get it through this particular service. You wouldn’t call Stanley Steemer to clean your gutters.
The difference between eHarmony and the Spark group is that eHarmony is a single organization for everyone, but Spark has split theirs up into individualized websites.
I think of it like this, if a Muslim went into Barnes & Noble to buy a Koran and got told “oh, our CEO decided Muslims are evil so we’re not selling any Muslim-related material anymore” that’s discrimination. If a Muslim went into a Christian bookstore for a Koran, they should have taken a better look at the sign on the door.
So a dating site that advertises to a very specific group is discriminatory to all others. So a coffee shop that doesn’t sell tea is discriminatory against tea drinkers? Why don’t we tell all businesses how they can run, what products they sell, and how to do business!!! Welcome to socialism!!! Give it up. In the name of freedom why do people have to be that arrogant? Is it discriminatory? Of course, just the same as a shop that sells exclusively dog toys is discriminating against cats, or a tea shop that won’t sell coffee is discriminating against coffee drinkers or a donut shop that won’t sell bagels (discriminating against people that want bagels).
In short, discrimination can and does exist, and it shouldn’t bother you.
The site *should *offer options for males seeking males and females seeking females. Sure, it encourages something antagonistic to Christian principles - but this site also leads to premarital sex, also antagonistic to Christian principles.
