Cigar faux pas; Avoidance of

Factual Questions
1

I’ve been invited to the Flag Bridge tomorrow night for the flag staff’s weekly “cigar social”. I’ve done some work for the admiral and this is kind of a “bravo zulu” for a job well done.

Now GBS has already sent me some fine cigars and I had a few La Habana, Cuba Cohibas flown aboard from Rota, Spain.
A couple of questions for you cigar connoisseurs out there:

  1. Poke or clip. Whish is the accepted way of getting a hole in the end of a fine cigar.
    – a. Poking a hole in the end? If so, how big?
    – b. Clipping the end? If so, how much of the end is removed?
  2. With or without band. Do I leave it on?
  3. Preparing the cigar for lighting. I see some folks licking the outside of the entire cigar. Is this socially OK? How wet should it be? What’s it for? I know from a long time ago, we’d lick the outside of a “home-rolled” cigarette to prevent it from burning too fast and to inhibit “runners”.

Any other tips or faux pas to be avoided?

Voted Best Sport
And narrowly averted the despised moniker Smiley Master

Forward deployed until 18AUG00

2

This is the only one I can address. I heard that you should remove the band because it’s polite not to advertise that you may be smoking a finer cigar than your “host.” I don’t know the protocol if everyong is smoking the same brand.

PS- Yesterday, in San Diego, I saw my first aircraft carrier. Yep, big.

3

Here you go Chief:

http://cigars.about.com/hobbies/cigars/msub-psmoke.htm

Hope it helps.

4

ChiefScott askes:

Clipping is preferred. Poking a hole is not boorish per se, but does tend to compress the filler tobacco inside of the cigar, leading to a difficulty in the cigar drawing, and therefore a less satisfying smoke.

The end (head) of a hand-rolled cigar is usually covered by a little piece of wrapper tobacco called a “cap” (on very upscale cigars, the actual wrapper may be twisted into the cap; I think that genuine Cohibas are the only cigars on which you are likely to see this). Cut (with a very sharp knife, pair of scissors, or other bladed instrument) most, but not all, of the cap off.

British custom is to remove the band, so as not to advertise the brand that you’re smoking; American custom is to leave it on (“I paid $10 for this one cigar, and I want everyone to know it”). Don’t smoke the band; it tastes terrible :slight_smile: If you are going to remove it, wait until the cigar is smoked for a few minutes, as this loosens whatever grip the glue of the band may have on the wrapper; otherwise the wrapper may tear.

I don’t know what uniform is considered appropriate for a naval cigar social, and I probably wouldn’t know what that uniform consists of anyway; but if it involves white gloves, leave the band on regardless; nicotine stains are the very devil to get out, and the part of the reason for the band (the other part, of course, is advertising).

Licking the cigar is utterly unnecessary with a hand-rolled cigar (I suppose that it may be necessary with those bundles of dead leaves that are rolled by machine and sold in drug stores, but I have better taste than to smoke those). Just remove the cigar from its tube or wrapping (if necessary), cut the end, and light it; this will be easier, and the cigar will smoke more evenly, if this is done in two stages: first, char the foot, and then actually light it, applying suction to the cut end. If you use matches, you may need two for this operation; I did when I used matches. Don’t use a gasoline lighter; your cigar will taste like gasoline, which is vile.

“I don’t just want you to feel envy. I want you to suffer, I want you to bleed, I want you to die a little bit each day. And I want you to thank me for it.” – What “Let’s just be friends” really means

5

Under windy circumstances, the gasoline-type lighter is the lesser of two evils, the greater being an unlit cigar. :slight_smile:

I agree that, unless it’s the Royal Navy you work for, the band should be left on.

Enjoy – I came back from the DR with some nice Cohibas… the blend of tastes that a good cigar and a good single-malt bring is… indescribable!

  • Rick
6

1a. Clip the cigar. If this is a social event, cigar clippers will be available. Either the sort that looks like a pair of inverted scissors, or the little sliding kind that looks like a coin-conjuring trick. The slider will provide a uniform gash in the end to smoke through. If the scissors kind is used, clip an opening slightly smaller than the end of the cigar, between a quarter- to a half-inch.

  1. Band OFF, by all means.

  2. Oh, lordy. Whatever you do, do NOT lick your cigar. Good cigars should retain enough moistness in the tobacco for a smooth smoke.

PS: If you find yourself turning slightly green, do not admit to your shipmates that the cigars are at fault; they may lose respect for you.

Tell them you’re sea-sick.

<g>

Uke

7

I’d go for leaving the band on, simply because if you’re not practiced with cigars you may look silly trying to get it off unless it slides easily. And, one other function of the band (especially on cheaper cigars) is to help keep the wrapper on. I’ve had some amazingly expensive cigars start to unravel when I took the band off.

When you clip the end of the cigar, you want to achieve two things: First, you want to make a hole through the wrapper so you can draw smoke, and second, you want to leave part of the cap on so the wrapper doesn’t unravel. Clip as small an amount off the end as you can to achieve this. If you try to clip too fine, you’ll squish the part you’re trying to clip or the clipper will slide off. Clip too much, and you’ll pull the cap off. You should be able to tell by feel if the cutter has a good grip and is cutting through.

One of the easiest ways to get a cigar ready is to use a bullet cutter, which looks like a .45 or .38 brass shell casing (and that’s often what it is, with sharpened edges). You simply put it against the end of the cigar and turn it. It will cut a nice hole in the wrapper of the perfect size. I had one of those for a while and it beat the hell out of a regular cutter.

At a social, they may have a tray with seveal cutters on it available for use. If you see the little bullet casing, try it. It’s the easiest for a new person to use.

To light a cigar, you should first hold it out and heat the end while turning the cigar, to get the entire end smoldering. Then put the cigar in your mouth and light it again while drawing. The purpose of this two-stage process is to get an even burn so the cigar doesn’t start burning down one side more than the other while you smoke it. On a large-gauge cigar like a Hemingway or a Robusto, this is necessary. On a thin cigar it’s not, and you can light it like a cigarette.

If you are completely new to cigars, I would add a couple other pieces of advice: First, take your time smoking it, and only after a large meal. Second, don’t inhale. If you’re going to be smoking a real Cuban Cohiba, the thing will knock you on your butt if you smoke it quickly. A cigar like that can be smoked over a period of a couple of hours.

If you aren’t a regular cigar smoker, a Cohiba may not be your best choice. You might be better off getting a cigar that is less strong, like a good quality Macanudo. Cigars from the Dominican Republic are usually the mildest, with Honduran cigars being somewhat stronger and Cuban cigars being strongest of all.

8

In real-life or in a porn movie? Too bizarre! (Note to self: placate oral fixation with things not blatently phallic.)

“Love Story? There’s two things wrong with that movie: No Smokey, and no Bandit!” – Eric Forman, That 70’s Show

9

Cigar lighting tip:

As was mentioned before, the idea is to toast the end of the cigar with your lighter/match/flamethrower/etc. Make sure you have the end completely lit, rolling it as you hold it in the flame. Once it’s good and red, take one drag off of it under the flame. If done properly, the cigar should be lit. It should only take 1 drag to light. There are 2 very important reasons for this. One is, as was mentioned, it burns more evenly. The other is it keeps the cigar cooler. Ever “hot box” a cigarette by puffing it to death, and the thing gets really hot? Same thing happens to the cigar if you just stick a flame under it and start sucking, and believe me, hot boxing a cigar is hell. :slight_smile:

God WAS my co-pilot, but we crashed in the mountains and i had to eat him.

10

Yeah. Actually smoking the damn thing.

P.U.

Gypsy: Tom, I don’t get you.
Tom Servo: Nobody does. I’m the wind, baby.

11

I have learned that a really good cigar does not taste as bad as it smells.

AskNott

"Measure twice, cut once. Dang! Measure again, cut again.

12

Nothing tastes as bad as a cigar smells.

Eschew Obfuscation

13

Hey, this is REALLY about cigar etiquette!

And here’s my dirty mind thinking you guys were having another shot at Monica…

Knock softly but firmly, 'cause I like soft firm knockers…

14

The “cigar social” went excellently last night – not a faux pas in sight!
Thanks for all coaching. Though I am not a neophyte when it comes to cigar smoking, I just wanted to be comfortable with what I was going to be doing, especially around the brass.
BTW, I now have to get some Cohibas for the XO. It figures. A chief can get aboard some decent cigars, but the executive officer has repeatedly come up empty.
This proves once again that the hook-ups in the Chiefs’ Mess have a longer reach than those in the Wardroom.

Voted Best Sport
And narrowly averted the despised moniker Smiley Master

Forward deployed until 18AUG00

15

Good on you Chief. The only time I ever set foot on blue tile was when I thought no one was looking or we had set the boat on fire again.

I did get to smoke one of the Habanas we got in Pert. I was never a big smoker but those contraband boys are sweet.

16

You don’t smoke those big long ones all at once, right? Do you just let the thing go out on its own or do you gingerly stub it out? Or is there some supersecret way to do it that knaves like myself could never possibly understand? (If you’re wondering if I’m sitting here with a lit cigar smoked one-tenth of the way down, wondering what the heck to do, the answer is yes.)

17

To put it out…put it down.
In an ashtray or proper holder.
It will go out on its own.

18

Very important!

Never stick the lit end of the cigar in your host’s eye.

Big no-no.

19

I hope you did not burn your fingers sitting there with a lit cigar for six and a half hours waiting for Doug Bowe to answer your question.

20

No, I came out quite uninjured. I smoked about another tenth of it, and then I sort of gently rubbed the tip in its ashes. It went out mostly on its own.

I have smoked a very few cigars in my life and lately I have had an inexplicable craving for them. I am mostly ignorant of their mysterious ways. I just bought one, probably a laughably cheap one that only peasants smoke, on a whim. I am currently wondering why some puffs taste so amazingly good and some are so nasty and bitter. I think the bigger puffs tend to taste more bitter, and the little tentative ones are more likely to taste great. Also, wind on the tip seems to make it taste worse (like, when you’re driving and holding it near the open car window, because you’re freakish cigar craving simply would not wait to get home).