civil war ninjas

Ninjas were at Gettysburg.

The link isn’t working for me.

Linkie no workie.

Bad luck. It was a piece at the Modern Humorist: . It seems to have dissapeared. Sorry. Try back later.

The link is working again.

I find it disturbing that a history teacher didn’t know that Ninjas played a key role in the Union’s victory at Gettysburg, and thinks that this kid made it up. If that swarm of ninjas flowing like water from the underbrush hadn’t stopped Pickets’s charge, well, I wouldn’t want to be a black person in Mississippi right now. Of course, the kid has it all wrong; Lincoln did pay the ninja’s, and most of them went back to Japan peacefully, with the exception of few who ended up confused for Indians, and herded onto reservations, until they meet up with Custer, but thats a whole other story. It was a combination of the World Zionist Conspiracy, who lost a lot on the loans they made to the South, of racist CIA members who didn’t like Lincoln’s post-war plans for blacks, the Artic Nazi’s, who also hated blacks, and of course, the Illuminati, who used mind control devices given to them by the Reptoids to make Booth shoot Lincoln.

Correction, the kid was wrong about ninja’s killing Lincoln; the other stuff is true. And for the record, Ninjas do wear their mask when having sex.

DreadCthulhu: You’re wrong. I’m a member of the Illuminat, in fact I’m the Supreme Military Chief of the Servants of Cthulhu. I was the one who killed Lincoln and framed poor Booth for the crime. (We Illuminati invented an immortality serum centuries ago, and I’ve been around since 1620.) Why did we kill Lincoln, you ask?

There are some things too horrible for ordinary mortals to know.

BTW, be glad we Servants like your posts. Else you would meet the fate of Robert Blake for daring to profane the name of Great Cthulhu.

This goes a lot deeper than I thought…