Classic rock n' roll standards that must be buried before someone else records them

Cafe Society
1

As I fill out the gaps in my album collection (notably from the late '60s through the '70s), I’m struck by how many people have recorded songs that were maybe borderline tolerable when first released, but have become increasingly nauseating through repetition.

Exhibit A is “Hey Joe”, which was recorded by (among others) Jimi Hendrix and Deep Purple. This is a song about a guy who’s preparing to shoot his ol’ lady to death, told in the form of dialogue with a clueless nitwit.

Hey Joe, where you going with that gun in your hand
I’m gonna shoot my old lady, caught her messin’ round with another man.
Hey Joe, can you stop and get me some ribs afterwards?

Alright, I kind of made up that last line. But this jerk actually encourages the shooter to put another bullet in his woman, at least in the Hendrix version. A completely worthless song.

Then there is “Memphis”, which wasn’t a terribly bad Chuck Berry song, at least until the last stanza:

Last time I saw Marie she’s waving me good-bye
With hurry home drops on her cheek that trickled from her eye
Marie is only six years old, information please
Try to put me through to her in Memphis Tennessee

“Hurry home drops”, blauggggh. A slew of people like Elvis and Johnny Rivers* have recorded this song, in increasingly sentimental and loathsome fashion.

One more candidate is the Ledbetter song “Midnight Special”, which I wouldn’t have thought to include except that I recently discovered it was recorded by ABBA. I now live in fear that someday I will accidentally hear this version and suffer permanent brain damage.

There must be many more “standards” out there that threaten to spawn new and horrific covers (sometimes I fantasize about the worst possibilities, like Lou Reed and Cyndi Lauper doing “Islands In The Stream”).

Any contributions to the list of Great Rock Standards That Must Die Before They Can Be Covered Again?
*A good clue to candidates for the list can be found in a comprehensive Johnny Rivers discography.

2

Proud Mary.

Gross. Consider the lyric:
I pumped alot of 'tang down in New Orleans

That ain’t even right. It’s all kindsa wrong.

And it’s not only songs being covered, but should also include songs being ruined and mangled by sampling.

Look what Kid Rock did to Werewovles of London by Zevon and Sweet Home Alabama.

Now, granted Sweet Home Alabama is an over-played, tired, worn-out classic, but shoooot, when it comes on the radio, I reach over and “turn it up” just like Ronnie tells me to. That opening riff goes right to the spine. If you catch it in the middle it just isn’t the same. So Sweet Home should never be retired, but Proud Mary? Bury that sucker low and deep.

3

All Along The Watchtower gets my vote.

4

Not even close. Depending on the transcription, it’s either “pain” or “tane,” the latter of which makes no sense.

An Arky, Watchtower will never die. :smiley:

5

Gaaahhh!!! That hurts!

BTW, I think 'tane is short for octane.

6

You could go with the (oc)tane meaning. Pumpin’ gas in NO - sounds like it would suck to me.

7

I know, it is curious isn’t it?
I’m not claiming to be an expert, but I was told by an old black bluesman here in Georgia that the popular radio version is the cleaned-up one, and that the original lyric was 'tang, as in poontang, but it is never printed that way for obvious reasons. He said it didn’t matter to him or his cronies, because they all know what it means, and they get a kick out of making the white folks ponder it.

Then again, maybe he was just pullin’ my lily white leg.

And add anything by the Doobie Brothers to this list.

8

Roger that!

9

According to John Fogerty himself, (via Wikipedia) the word he intended is “pain.” He says he thinks Tina intended to sing “'tane,” as in short for “octane.” He explained it as saying he likes to write words that fit his vocal style. Fogerty says, “Sometimes the listener doesn’t understand what I’m singing because I’m dedicated to singing the vowel, having fun with the word sounds coming out of my mouth.”

10

It sounds much better with harpsichord than sitar- too bad Savage Grace picked up a crappy early synthesizer for this live version.

11

Since “Proud Mary” was written by (a very white) John Fogarty, and since Fogarty claims the lyric is definitely “pumped a lot of pain,” (he says he just thought it sounded cool. He also says that Tina Turner changed it to “pumped a lot of 'tane,” but that’s not what he wrote), I think that he was pulling your leg.

ETA looks like cochrane beat me to it.

12

My own suggestion for retirement, by the way, is “Taking Care of Business,” just because it’s the most overplayed and most mediocre bar band song in history.

13

Yeah, I knew John Fogarty wrote it, but this guy was claiming he stole the line from an old blues song, much in the way that Zeppelin incorporated lines like “come in my kitchen”, “she got a mortgage on my body and a lien on my soul” and the infamous “squeeze my lemon” line from Robert Johnson and Leadbelly…or was it Howlin’ Wolf? I dunno, one of those. He was actually quite bitter and adamant that pretty much all of rock and roll was unoriginal and a mere rip off of the blues, so I didn’t argue with him, even though I don’t agree with his opinion. According to him, Elvis and Clapton are pretty much twin devils incarnate for ripping off the blues. Evenso, I still can only hear “'tang” in that Proud Mary song. Chalk it up to the power of suggestion. Either way, it still should not be covered by anyone again. Ever.

Now, lemme un-hijack with another suggestion.
Um, Rock and Roll Hoochie Coo? The title alone should get that one a ride in a hearse to the rock and roll graveyard. We’ve been punished enough.

14

We all see different things in art. I’ve never heard Deep Purple’s version, only Jimi’s. I don’t think the “narrator” voice is telling Joe to shoot again: it’s Joe saying “shoot her again”. The narrator’s lines are just those that comprise “Hey Joe [question]?” The narrator is just a device to ask the rhetorical questions.

Also, at least when Jimi sings it, I’ve always had the impression that Joe is about to, then has, committed a crime of anger that he knows he shouldn’t have and regrets. There’s a sadness to the bravado. Obviously Joe’s behaviour is despicable but I don’t think a song is despicable just because it describes behaviour that is despicable (but common enough, sadly).

15

(I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction. Great Stones song, hilarious Devo cover… and that’s it for acceptable versions of the song. Britney Spears, Samantha Fox, and Vanilla Ice have all unnecessarily covered it, among many others.

And not sure if anyone would agree with me that it’s a standard, but The Smith’s “How Soon Is Now?” has been covered far too many times by far too many people. Snake River Conspiracy, Everclear… thanks, guys, thanks for destroying the song. (I do like t.A.T.u.'s cover of it, oddly enough.)

16

From a transcription of the lyrics (I think this is fair use, as there are only about a dozen words involved, not including grunts):

Alright
(Ah! Hey Joe)
Shoot her one more time again, baby!
(Oo)
Yeah.
(Hey Joe!)
Ah, dig it!
(Hey)
Ah! Ah!
(Joe where you gonna go?)
Oh, alright.

Sheer poetry.

Maybe the sidekick isn’t telling Joe to shoot her again. Maybe Joe is talking to himself, or is schizophrenic and hearing voices. All I know is that whenever I hear somebody sing “Hey Joe” I want to tell them to stop messin’ around, or I’ll shoot them down.

17

I was gonna post this too but with the same reservations. Although Love Spit Love’s version was acceptable.

18

Is that the version used in the TV series Charmed?

Student Driver, good call – “How Soon is Now?” is very much a standard.

…

In the post-synth era, I don’t think a credible cover of Sweet’s “Love is Like Oxygen” can be made. Dream Theater maybe could make a run at it.

19

I disagree: The song is worth it for its inclusion in one of Weird Al’s polka medleys.

20

Any of the “Johnny Got a Guitar” songs, from Chuck Berry to Foreigner and whoever else has done versions… a tired old motif that should be well berried (ha!).