[QUOTE=Taters]
Oooops! I didn’t mean to forget, but many congrats to the welbybrats!
[/QUOTE]
They don’t need congrats. They need JOBS!
Actually, they don’t. The boy will be going to Mason (where I work) and the girl to community college, so they’re fine.
But when they have those degrees. . .
[QUOTE=anyrose]
I missed the “dead ringer” joke - were both halves of it told?
[/QUOTE]
Nope, thats it. Spoiler:
“Dead ringer” is a term for looking exactly like someone, plus he also actually did ring the bells for his dead bro.
[QUOTE=welby]
They don’t need congrats. They need JOBS!
Actually, they don’t. The boy will be going to Mason (where I work) and the girl to community college, so they’re fine.
But when they have those degrees. . .
[/QUOTE]
Heh! We always tease our kids and tell them they need to get good grades so they can go to college and support us in our old age; or better yet; as soon as they graduate college.
The son is talking engineering and the daughter is talking psychology. We shall see. The daughter graduates in 2008. The son will graduate in 2011.
Congrats to the welbyspawn!
Have you ever had a day when you knew that being too nice was going to bite you in the ass? The new girl I’m training (who is off doing other things right now) actually asked me for a ride to work tomorrow, because she doesn’t have a car, and suggested we car pool. I couldn’t say “I really like my alone time in the car” without sounding like a bitch, so I agreed. I’m going to regret it, I know I am. She’s really nice, and I like her a lot … but dammit, I like my alone time in the car, too.
Sorry about the double post guys, but I have a quick little joke:
A husband was in big trouble when he forgot his wife’s birthday.
His wife told him “Alright buster, tomorrow there had better be
something in the driveway for me that goes from 0 to 200 in 2
seconds flat or you’re in for it!”
The next morning the wife awoke early and looking out her
bedroom window, spotted a small package in the driveway. She was a
little perturbed as this wasn’t what she was expecting. She went out
and retrieved the package, and upon opening it, found a handsome,
brand new bathroom scale!
Funeral arrangements for the husband have been set for this Saturday.
I didn’t say it was go-o-o-o-o-o-od, I just said it was quick.
[QUOTE=Draelin]
Congrats to the welbyspawn!
Have you ever had a day when you knew that being too nice was going to bite you in the ass? The new girl I’m training (who is off doing other things right now) actually asked me for a ride to work tomorrow, because she doesn’t have a car, and suggested we car pool. I couldn’t say “I really like my alone time in the car” without sounding like a bitch, so I agreed. I’m going to regret it, I know I am. She’s really nice, and I like her a lot … but dammit, I like my alone time in the car, too.
[/QUOTE]
Oh, man, I would have flat out said, “I’ll drive you tomorrow, sure, but I really like my time alone in the car.” I have before. I really don’t care if people think I’m a snot… my car time is my meditative time and the few times I’ve been in a carpool for any length of time I notice my fuse getting shorter at work and being less nice.
[QUOTE=Anaamika]
Oh, man, I would have flat out said, “I’ll drive you tomorrow, sure, but I really like my time alone in the car.” I have before. I really don’t care if people think I’m a snot… my car time is my meditative time and the few times I’ve been in a carpool for any length of time I notice my fuse getting shorter at work and being less nice.
[/QUOTE]
I’m just too damned nice. sigh You wouldn’t know it to look at me. lol
Let’s see…congrats to the welbybrats. Sorry about sending Alfredo your way dogb. drae, make something up and tell her you can’t do it afterall. It’s not too late. You’ve been suckered and she won’t stop there. dolores, condolences on the boy moving back.
I am now officially an empty nester. The Princess[sup]TM[/sup] moved all but a very few things out yesterday. Among those things not moved yet…her dog and her cat. :rolleyes:
bobbio, well? Well? How did it go?
swampy, hope you’ve warned ACBG about the next time you to can get together. 
I got nuttin else. Cept today is payday. Yay!
Tupug
[QUOTE=taxi78cab]
dogb, it’s so funny that you mentioned the flooding at the Crabtree Valley Mall. When I read the MMP this morning, I had just read an email from my ex-bf who lives down there and he mentioned the same thing. It sounds like it was pretty bad around Raleigh.
[/QUOTE]
You know, I don’t think I’ve ever had a civilized conversation with any of my ex-girlfriends. Very uncomfortable in one situation, when I worked with an ex-GF for about a year after the break-up. And anymore, any conversation with my ex-wife usually degrades into a shouting match or requires legal intervention.
I’m what you would call a bad breaker-upper. But none of it is my fault.
Drae I thought you were leaving this place? What’s the new girl going to do after you go?
[QUOTE=eleanorigby]
I laughed at all three jokes.
[/QUOTE]
But there were only two jokes. And one pun. The jokes were good. The pun, not so much.
A guy comes home from a night on the town. Obviously drunk, his wife stops him at the door and asks, “Where the hell have you been? It’s 2:30 in the morning!”
He says (and insert drunk sounding slurring and such) “Well, I don’t know, but I do remember this. It had a big green door, a red carpet leading up to the bar, a band, and golden toilets.” He then falls on his face, passed out.
The wife grabs the phone book, looks in the bars section, and lo and behold, finds a place called “The Green Door”. So she calls them, hoping someone is still there at this late hour. Luckily, she does get the bartender.
“I know this is a stupid question, but do you really have a big green door?”
The bartender says, “Yes ma’am, you can’t miss it. Big and green. That’s why we have this name for the bar.”
“Okay, another dumb question. Are your carpets red?”
“Yes ma’am, bright royal red, very hard to forget once you see it. We looked all over the world for something as distinctive as our carpet.”
“Okay, one last question. Are your commodes really made of gold?”
The the bartender turns away from the phone and yells, “Hey Harry! I think we got a lead on who took a dump in your saxaphone!”
I’m here - I’m just actually getting some work done today
I’ll check back this afternoon - let me know if anything wild happens
[QUOTE=Sean Factotum]
Drae I thought you were leaving this place? What’s the new girl going to do after you go?
[/QUOTE]
That’s a part of my dilemma. I am hoping to leave by August, at which time she’d be out of luck. Now I’m all annoyed with myself because I’d feel like a jerk going back on my word if I told her I couldn’t car pool. She would only need a ride to work, which is better than the alternative.
I’m hoping that the train she’s taking to get her closer to my house so I can pick her up at the station leaves so early she’s not prepared to wait around for me for the better part of an hour and she goes back to her current method. I like her, and I feel bad for not wanting to drive her in, but that’s just my stupid dilemma for today.
Woo-hoo! Just received some great news!
The hubby called me about half an hour ago and informed me that we need to book a trip to Vegas for the first few days of July. I responded that I thought that we had agreed to not go because we’ve been on a bit of spending binge (new rig, new grill, new patio furniture, new washer/dryer, etc).
That’s when he informed me that he’d been called back to the ramp and pulled into the back office to be informed that he was now a “Million Mile Safe Driver” and would be receiving his $5,000.00 bonus next week. Woo-hoo!
Frankly, I’d rather pay down some of these new bills, but he earned the award, he should be able to spend it on something fun. This is something he wants to do, so we’ll do it.
Bobbio, how’d the inspection go? You know, I’ve been thinking about the cyberstalker thing. Have you given thought to changing your e-mail address?
I’m a bad influence.
Two Sundays ago, we had the neighbors over for dinner. One of the hot topics was our not even 48 hour-old carpet. When we told them that we picked up a full cup of crud with the Dyson after the carpet installers vacuumed the place before they left, our neighbor was impressed.
Today’s our every-other-week recycling pickup. When I left the house this morning, I started laughing when I saw a Dyson box at the curb, in front of our neighbor’s house.
I’m just waiting for next pickup day, expecting to see a big box labeled “DISHWASHER” on the curb. After dinner, I fired up the dishwasher. When someone asked if they could help with the cleanup, I said “No thanks, I’ve already got everything in the dishwasher.” Their eyes popped out and they said “It’s running? Our dishwasher’s so loud!” I better not tell them about our two year old, but still rather quiet front-load washing machine. 
[QUOTE=welby]
My commute is a horrendous, challenging, vicious 5 minutes drive. Some days, if traffic’s really bad, it’s a ten minute drive. I don’t know how I stand it.
[/QUOTE]
Yeah, well, I’ve got you beat, welby. My commute is from my bedroom in the back of the house to my office in the front of the house. Some days (like today) I don’t even get out of my PJs till noon.
Do you ever feel like you ought to get some sort of commission when you’re the first of your crowd/neighborhood to get something, and little by little everyone else gets the same thing?
I wasn’t the first to get an iPod, but I was the first to get an accessory for it that turns it into a digital recorder - now half my chorus “tapes” rehearsals with their iPods
On Tuesday (I don’t think I mentioned this) we had 30 'Library Ambassadors" from the public school across the road. They were each to select books from the school library. Two teachers and 30 10 and 11 year olds.
It would have been nice to know we were supposed to give a 5 minute talk about books. I bravely volunteered my co-worker.
Yesterday I talked to my manager about us getting lunch out at Susur Lee’s, danger pay, and getting the vodka and whiskey taps installed under the front counter. We deserve vodka. I’ll even bring my own mixers!
:smack: I was a whole page behind when I posted. I was kinda surprised at how many posts went up simultaneously with mine…until I noticed what page my post wasn’t on.
Note to self: Pay attention!
Congrats to the future welbysupporters! I frequently inform my kids of the style to which I wish to become accustomed. They remind me they’re picking the home to put me in. We’re having a bit of a disconnect here.
It’s far too pretty a day to have to be working. Will someone please ask their house elf to get this job completed for me by the end of the day? Mine refuses to do mypaying work for me. Sigh.
I borrowed Midnight in the Garden of Smelliness…er, that is, Good and Evil…from the library.
[QUOTE=Lissla Lissar]
It would have been nice to know we were supposed to give a 5 minute talk about books. I bravely volunteered my co-worker.
[/QUOTE]
Yeah, IMO kids are a good reason to go and hide.
Things are actually quiet at the new job. So I’m guessing it’s going to be a mix of hurry-up-and-get-5-things-done and quiet days when there’s not as much to do. That’s a good mix as far as I’m concerned.
KeithT’s going to be in town this weekend. I’m trying to figure out how much we can realistically get done. My boss mentioned an art show downtown which would be cool. I want to get some herbs and maybe a tomato plant potted and onto our patio. I’m hoping we can go talk to the minister at the church that I like to see if KeithT likes the church and the minister enough to go with me. We’ve got to put away whatever he brings with him (pre-move stuff) and pack up some of my stuff that is going in to storage at his parents’. And there’s a thing at the science museum that we both want to go to (I think this is going to have to wait for another weekend tho.) and there’s always the zoo. And he hasn’t been to the aquarium at the Mall of America yet. And, well, probably most importantly, significant time to be spent in bed. Because with all his work on his thesis, he’s really tired. Yeah… that’s why we’re going to be in bed. Because he’s tired.
You’ll like it, Meeks. It’s fun. It was on the bestseller list for years.
Took CherryGirl to the orthodontist this morning. We are scheduled for the big brace installation in August. She’s been going to the orthodontist for two years now, with prepartory work, and … isn’t this funny … the braces are all paid off! We started making our monthly payments when she was first being seen, through the palate expander, through the “let her grow a little more” phase and now that she’s ready for the actual braces, no more payments! Whee!
Prior to the appointment, she was in my office this morning, reading a joke book I’ve got in case someone needs a speech written. :rolleyes: (That is, in fact, actually true.) She was particularly enamored with the Dumb Blonde Chapter.
Here is my favorite: Two blondes were sitting on the deck one evening. The first says, “which do you think is further away – California or the moon?”
Says the other: “Boy are you ever stupid! California is further! You can see the moon from here!”
chortle, chortle