Well, it appears the cliche of the anal retentive nerd nitpicking the minutia of the very media they are the target audience of is still alive and well. 
Excuse me while I go play SimEarth and Curses.
You’re funny. 
Of course, green eggs and ham would look perfectly normal in a zombie graveyard.
Since English is only my second language, I might be wrong, but don’t you think *minutiae * would be a better choice here?
What!?
Wow, you guys never heard of Dr. Doomfear Gunhand: The Bad Guy Hunter? It had all kinds of features as close to reality as they could make it.
Like when you got hurt, you didn’t just eat asprin or pick up a medkit, you went to go to a separate screen where you had to carefully apply different kinds of bandages to your wounds. If you didn’t cover the wound right, or forgot antibacterial ointment, the wound would go bad and you would lose the limb or die. If you actually got shot, bandages didn’t do anything, and you had to go see a doctor. You had only a few minutes to get to one or you would die. And then of course the cops would show up and want to know why the doc had to dig slugs out of you, and why you were packing.
It had a great inventory system too. You could carry something in your hand, and a few little things in your pockets, and maybe a pistol in your belt, and that was all. Oh, you could find a backpack that let you carry more stuff, but it threw your balance off if you had anything heavy and made it impossible to jump & move quietly. Also it took a while to take off and rumage through to find anything in it. If you tried to carry something too heavy, you might throw your back out. Then you would move slower and couldn’t sneak at all. Made using the rocket launcher kinda rough.
Also, your character had to eat and go to the bathroom every now and then. If you didn’t eat he would get faint and move slower and his hands would shake. And it had to be good stuff. If all you ate was candy you would get a headache, and if all you ate was McDonalds then you got fat. If you didn’t go to the bathroom, well, sometimes that took care of itself. Made it really hard to sneak. Depends was always a great find.
You may not have heard of it. It didn’t do well. Cuz it sucked.
Either that, or the one item you need is only available in one shop in the entire game for a rediculous overinflated price, say a plain water bottle. (And it is the only thing in the entire game world capable of holding, say…ordinary water) Or it may be available as a prize for a long complicated side quest. good grief that sort of thing sucks.
NPC deaths piss me off. They’re staged to advance the plot and you can’t avoid them even though it doesn’t make any sense.
“He got me, Johnny! You must go to the castle…”
“Relax. We got healing out the wazoo.”
“No, it’s too late for me. Your healing magic cannot help.”
“Our own party takes worse than this all the time. We bring 'em back the next round. Our cleric keeps Resurrect memorized. That could bring you back if all we had left was a fingernail.”
“Don’t waste a spell on me, I’ve had a good life.”
“Waste, nothing. It only takes eight hours to rest and regain spells. We can do it right in front of the next door, since nobody ever opens doors but us.”
“Actuallly, I’d kind of rather you let me die. My time has passed, I’ve fought my fight…”
“That doesn’t even make sense. Drink this healing potion!”
“No!”
“Yes!”
“No!”
In the end, the old wizard died choking on a healing potion
I’ve been replaying Baldur’s Gate with the Baldur’s Gate TuTu program, and I’m finding the world full of barrels with gold or gems in them. My thief unlocks doors, and then when we walk into the previously-locked houses, most people don’t ask how we got in. I assume for roleplaying purposes that I’m actually talking to distract the residents while Imoen rifles through their drawers, but if I really did I imagine the conversation would go something like this:
“What can you tell me of this Amnish invasion?”
“Oh, it’s terrible. I’ve been saving to move my family out, but somebody stole our gold.”
“What, already? I mean, egads, somebody broke in and robbed you?”
“No, we were keeping our money in a rain barrel outside the house. We thought, ‘What kind of nut would go digging in peoples’ rain barrels?”
“Word to the wise, ma’am. Don’t put your valuables in any container that lights up when you hit ‘Tab.’”
“But the others don’t open at all.”
“Whoops. Imoen says it’s time to go. Take care, ma’am.”
Minutia is the plural of minutiae.
In RPGs, NPCs often will just blurt out some random thought or tidbit of information. The games rarely, if ever, indicate what your character said to them. It especially gets irritating if you are stuck in the game and maybe talk to townspeople. Now, I’m not expecting some ordinary peasant to know the secret to slaying the Giga Fire Golem or whatever, but at the very least maybe he/she could point me to someone who does, or give me some kind of lead.
Incubus bumps into a lady with a basket on her head
Basket Lady: There sure are a lot of monsters roaming around these days
Incubus: Excuse me?
BL: I said there sure are a lot of monster’s roaming around these days
Incubus: I’m sorry, I didn’t even ask you a question
BL: I know, you just seem like someone who might want to know that.
Incubus: Why do you need to tell me this?
BL: I’m telling everybody!
Incubus: :smack:
I just got the Simpsons for the Wii and as you play the game one of your “quests” is to discover the 31 videogame clicehs.
You sure 'bout that?
I love how even when everybody knows you’re the last hope of the world against the great darkness, you don’t get the tiniest little discount on stuff you might need, like healing potions, to do it with. Or a room to stay in. Or dinner.
You pretty much just described Metal Gear Solid: Snake Eater, but it did very well.
Actually, the correct answer “who gives a shit?”
Eeh… You? Since you brought it up?
Feeling a bit testy? Maybe a healing potion would help.
I like the HALO “loot the corpse” model: you run out of ammo, you can hope that somebody, friend or ally, is carrying the same weapon, so you can grab their supplies when they die, or you can choose to dump the empty weapon and pick up something else. This has been adopted by some games, but I’m surprised it isn’t more widespread.
The deathtrap that requires you to run through it at full speed making split-second decisions about when to jump, dodge, duck, turn and shoot. Especially when you don’t have enough ammo or time to shoot ALL the enemies and you have to figure out exactly which enemies must be shot in what order, to survive the death course. This isn’t a test of skill, it’s a test of your determination to memorize the course as you replay from your save point 50-100 times. Seriously, is there ever, ever, EVER a time in real life in which the smart thing to do is to plunge headlong into the maelstrom and trust your wits?
Yeah, I have always wanted to try out some of that crap IRL and see how it goes over.
FBI: Hey you were you standing here five minutes ago when the bank was robbed?
Wolfman: Yes I saw everything, I even have the license number.
FBI: Great give it to me!
WM: Just a sec I have a few tasks for you first…
FBI What the fuck are you talking about.
WM: First go to my house and pick up the overdue Library book and return it for me…
FBI Are you insane?
WM: My house is north at the end of a road, you will have to find the library on your own. After you do that…
FBI: Give me the License plate!
WM: I think I must have knocked a good knife in the garbage before I took it out, you will have to go to the dump and look for it…
(FBI beats the shit out of Wolfman)
Lava.
There’s always a level that has lava in the background just because.
Sure, GCI lava looked cool 10 years ago, but come on. It’s not that impressive a graphic anymore. On a tropical island somewhere? Yep, there’s a volcano. Sometimes it’s just molten steel in some steam factory, but it’s still red and flowing. Just why the hell would anyone build a Pokemon stadium be in the middle of a volcano?
How 'bout a few from Diablo II, since I’ve been playing it again recently (because my old computer can’t handle any of the newer stuff very well).
I can’t use that yet: I can carry five or six full suits of heavy plate armor in my backpack, but I’m not strong enough to wear any of it. Never mind that I can fit even a single set of armor into a backpack.
Mercenary resurrection: For a hefty fee, somebody in town will cheerfully resurrect my dead sidekick. Yet this same NPC can’t (or won’t) resurrect any of his or her own fallen comrades, whose corpses are found littering every area of the game. Sigh. If only the NPCs had just looked into all those chests and baskets and jars and barrels, they would have found enough gold to have their comrades revived. And why does an archangel need gold to resurrect somebody?
Poorly-equipped NPCs: There’s a blacksmith and other vendors in town who will happily sell me anything and everything I need, including all manner of powerful weaponry and armor. Yet apparently, either they can’t be bothered to supply their own allies with suitable gear, or those allies have failed to avail themselves of their services. Witness, once again, the multitude of corpses found throughout the game, and especially the utterly ineffectual barbarian soldiers in Act V. If the local soldiers themselves can’t afford to properly equip themselves, can’t the local ruler pay to equip them?
Healing shrines and potions: Clearly, neither the NPCs nor the monsters know what these things are for.