College For A Poor Girl

dah, this is the biggest question I have ever asked on here. I need big big help… all the information any of you people can give would help me more than you ever could imagin.

A very close freind of mine / girlfreind wants to go to college. I agree that she should. she graduated from highschool second in the class… had a whole semester’s worth of AP credit when she graduated. had a full scholarship to some school or other.

however… her life went to crap. some terribly horrible stuff happened to her. grandmother who had raised her died (as her parents were dead) … she was abused… ect ect ect… if you can think of a bad thing… it happened to her. she was engaged to be marryed… and ended up with a child. before the guy ran off… leaveing her poor and homeless.

skipping to two months ago. I met her again… she was my best freind in highschool… but did not talk to her any because she was busy being ripped up by the world.

talking to her alot… I convinced her she should go to college. and promised I would help her figure out how thats possible. I promised alot… but I got no clue at all… I haven’t the vaugest idea how thats possible…

is it possible? can I keep my promise to figure out a way? can a girl who was homeless a few weeks ago… go to college? can anyone help me? tell me details about any ideas?

the way I see it… she can get scholarships a few ways:
merit: graduated second in her class in highschool mega scary SAT scores… 10 AP credits or so
need: she has zero dollars in her bank acount. she was homeless till recently.
hardship: I know scholarships exist for people who survived _____ or have ____ disease (diebeties scholarships exist I know… saw them before)
nurseing: she wants to major in nurseing… there is a nurseing shortage right now… know they are majorly desperate… and so are paying people’s way.

also… been talking to her about student loans… the logic I am useing is “dude, your getting more and more in debt everyday anyway… might as well go to college and get in debt in something that will make you make more money!”

anyway… I am begging for help… I want any advice anyone has… she assumes I know everything about going to college and applying and finantial aid and such… but honestly… my parents are mostly just paying for everything for me… saved money for it for me to go since way before I was born. (love them for that)

dah… I am desperate… I want help… is it possible for someone with no money… and a child to go to college? like… can someone with nothing in a bank acount… reasonably go to college one day… and end up paying? and not straveing to death?

I’m kinda over my head here… she was crying… she was feeling that she had ruined her life so totally… and that she had given up her chance to be a nurse and help people … I swore that wasn’t true… and promised that I would figure it out… and get her into college (said I would pay the application fee… and the acceptance fee when she got accepted… gah… expencive) … I wasn’t lieing to her I hope… someone please get me any information that she could use… on how someone with no money what so ever… and alot of expences (a baby) can go to school (the university of maine)… student loans look like all I am specificly comeing up with… just have her take out a massive loan… enough to pay for most everything… then just pray that as a nurse she has enough income that its workable to pay back

help…

I don’t know what state your in, but my impression here in Texas is that anyone who wants to go to college can through financial aid grants and loans.

The loans are super low interest, super low minimum payments, and you don’t start paying til you graduate so they are definitely a good way to go. And if I remember correctly, the amount you can get through loans is regardless of need and is plenty to pay one’s whole way through school.

Of course, I’m talking cheap state school here, not Harvard. Anyway, just walk in to any University’s financial aid office and ask them what you need to do.

Grants are also available and if you are seriously poor and have no support, they can be substantial.

As for scholarships, just do a google search and you should find some sites which list a bunch of scholarships and how to apply for them.

-Kris

She needs to start with the college(s) of her choice, then go talk to them about possible scholarships. There’s not much you can do without having some idea of which college, which course of study, she’s interested in.

Don’t overlook the possibilities of junior/community colleges, too, which often give full-ride tuition scholarships to high-scoring SATs, even if they’re from 10 years ago.

I mean, “college” doesn’t necessarily mean “four years of ivy-covered walls, and living in a dorm, and then you get out with a B.A. and you automatically get a job with your new college degree” etc.

Yes, she can certainly start college in the fall. Check out your state universities, which allow you to register for classes right up to the first day of school in September. (What state are you in?) She would need to establish legal residency to get the “resident” tuition. Again, she needs to go down to the college Financial Aid office and talk to them.

There’s not that much you can do for her yourself–this is going to take her own initiative, and a lot of it. You can’t hand her “college” on a silver platter, as in, “Here’s your ticket for college, all you have to do is show up”. “College” doesn’t work like that.

That alone should give her a good chance at a good deal to a state school, in the state she lives in. They will usually try to keep the local good talent. Honestly from your story, I can’t imagine that there isn’t at least one school that would give her a full ride, just have her talk to someone at the admissions department.

answering questions for people: she wants to go to the university of maine and study nurseing.

the basic problem is she has basicly decided its hopeless… and I need like… information so I can go “see, look here, it IS possible” and have like… some ablity to answer her questions about who to talk to and such (of course I am looking at this myself… not relying totally on an internet message board! just hopeing for advice)

kinda… see why she doesn’t belive me… I mean… that girl rarely has enough money to eat… sorta hard for her to imagin paying thousands and thousands of dollars for something… when little things like “food” are beyond her budget most days.

I think… I am getting her to belive me now. going to take her to the finantial aid office on campus this friday. explained student loans to her… and grants and such.

any one else have any advice I can give her? any smart ideas on money?

(and dah, shes working hard on this too… I’m not doing this while she sits in a chair and waits… I just promised so many times I would help her… because she felt so helpless… I want to actually be able to sit down and spout off specific things… exact where and when and how stuff and really get her motivated.)

answering questions for people: she wants to go to the university of maine and study nurseing.

the basic problem is she has basicly decided its hopeless… and I need like… information so I can go “see, look here, it IS possible” and have like… some ablity to answer her questions about who to talk to and such (of course I am looking at this myself… not relying totally on an internet message board! just hopeing for advice)

kinda… see why she doesn’t belive me… I mean… that girl rarely has enough money to eat… sorta hard for her to imagin paying thousands and thousands of dollars for something… when little things like “food” are beyond her budget most days.

I think… I am getting her to belive me now. going to take her to the finantial aid office on campus this friday. explained student loans to her… and grants and such.

any one else have any advice I can give her? any smart ideas on money?

(and dah, shes working hard on this too… I’m not doing this while she sits in a chair and waits… I just promised so many times I would help her… because she felt so helpless… I want to actually be able to sit down and spout off specific things… exact where and when and how stuff and really get her motivated.)

I would recommend perusing UME’s website, prior to your visit to the financial aid office:
Financial Aid at the University of Maine.

For the school of nursing at UMaine, the contact is here. My suggestion would be an e-mail or phone call to the person listed explaining the situation. This would probably be better coming from your friend.

Also, her high school guidance counselor (assuming she’s a recent graduate) should be able to provide some assistance, at least information regarding what’s out there.

UMaine also has a family housing set up (in the housing section of the UMaine website) that she might be interested in.

Beginning this fall may be difficult, if only because we’re heading into July and that’s a short time to get everything together. But I would discuss options with the school of nursing, and determine whether it’s best to rush to try to get in for this fall or take the time and be admitted for January. That may leave more time to organize scholarships and financial aid.

While I cannot offer any more than the same answers of loans, I can tell you that my wife lost both of her parents before she was ten as was raised by her grandparents who were quite poor.

She now has two undergraduate degrees, a degree in respiratory therapy (registered) and a masters.

The way she put it - she lived in the financial aid office and when she wasn’t waiting tables, she was filling out forms for even the smallest bit of money available.

I am a college professor myself and have many students who are living on loans. Many are also the first in their family to go to school.

Tell her to get a positive attitude. The school wants to help her get in and get those loans - it’s money for them. That’s why there is a loan office on campus. Of course they’ll help her get loans - the money goes in the school’s bank account.

This can be done - pure and simple.

:slight_smile:

Join the Army. Aren’t they giving college money?

I would imagine (possibly incorrectly) that the main reason she feels helpless and hopeless is that she has a young child dependent on her and this limits her real world options considerably. The child care options need to be surveyed before any college options are considered and depending on the age of the child it might well be a reality that college is out of the picture for several years.

For people who are determined few things are impossible and as others have noted very low (or no) cost community college options are often available for people in dire circumstances that will let them bootstrap themselves into a four year program if they are so inclined. If she is highly intelligent (as you seem to indicate) and determined and has some common sense a commissioned sales job in real estate and related fields can yield a good income in order for her to get her feet on the ground and also have flexible hours.

The single mother route is very, very tough. It’s not very PC but quite frankly her best practical strategy may well be to get married if she can find a willing and acceptable match that will help support her through college. Most of the problems you recite will be mitigated with additional resources and emotional support which a good marriage can potentially provide. The only caveat is that is appears her character radar regarding men may not be that well developed (or else she likes bad boys). If this is the case she is probably better off solo.

hoo boy… I think… I will not give her that advice. probobly a good thought. but her boyfreind… is err… me. and the fact that we have only been dateing for a month… makes that idea a little creepy. love her very much best freind for 6 years…care about her more than anyone alive. but… dislike marrying people in less than 10 dates. anyway… I am not exactly able to suport her as I am also going to college, and am easyly paying it off… but useing every last cent I have.

so err… nice thought… mabey someday. but since I told her I would have it figured out by the fourth of july… err… not so much

Have her check out Private College institutions too. Many give
scholarships that completely fill need. Princeton, the one I am most
familiar with, doesn’t even give loans… they fulfill need completely
with grant money only. The top-notch Universities are actually looking for
self-made individuals who overcame hardship. Especially with someone who
has such academic promise… I’m sure any one of the most prestigious
schools with plenty of money devoted to fulfilling need scholarships would
be VERY interested in such a person.

Hmmm…my mis-understanding, per your OP I thought you were her “girlfriend” girlfriend. God bless you trying to help but per your OP you might want to go lighter on the financial assistance promises if you don’t have the real world means to execute without endangering your own college scenario.

Help as much as you can, but I get the vibe from your OP that you are an earnest young man in heavy duty “rescue- fix it” mode for a fairly complicated situation for a woman in distress. I’m wired the same way and I’ve been there before more than once, and it rarely has had a positive outcome. In the end, for better or worse, the vortex of their complex personal situations will usually swallow you up and spit you out. I hope your luck is different. God bless you anyway for your good faith.

My aunt is a single mother on social security and unemployment, and she was able to go to the community college and get a medical secretary degree in a very short time, for free. I know this is not what your girlfriend’s ultimate goal is, but it is a step in the right direction. Once she goes to the CC, she can prove what a great student she is, even after all this time. My aunt was offered a chance to continue, but was too sick to do so.

Community colleges also have great child care, if her kid isn’t old enough for school.

A lot of the students i went to State College with had come from community college. Lots of CC’s have programs that help you get your basic stuff done there and then help you get into state college.

If nothing else, she can get some sort of medical office certificate and get a job that will help her make money towards her college goal.

Don’t let her get discouraged by the amount of time it may take to do all of this. Many people (like two of my aunts) just don’t get a chance to do what they dreamed of doing until they are older, and they are happy to have had the chance.

Be wise! Listen to astro! It sounds to me like you need to watch “The Blue Angel” with Dietrich or a remake of it. It also sounds as if the girl is still in the recovery phase and you would do well to backtrack and rethink your position. And reread astro’s post, particularly the part about keeping your trap shut about paying for anything. Best wishes!

alright… I had enough of this thread… its getting too personal… and not even mostly of my person

moderators… close this thread… throw it away.

Join the Air Force not the Army. The Air Force has the same college money and a more stable lifestyle for a mother.

                                                         - Air Force guy

Tell her that once she has a degree in nursing in her hand, she can basically write her own ticket anywhere in the U.S.A. Hospitals everywhere are always hiring.

Info on nursing as a job, and job prospects.
http://www.bls.gov/k12/html/sci_004.htm

http://www.bls.gov/emp/emptab4.htm

It’s #3, right there at the top of the list, “Registered Nurses”.

To be sure, I was guilty of bad manners in trying to interfere in your personal life and in neglecting your post. Sorry!