Comedians who kill. Kill the laughter, that is.

I think I heard this once before a long time ago, but I heard it again this week in a discussion on one of the entertainment shows (I think it was that E! daily show), where they were talking about which of the Friends cast would be most successful after the show ends. And they said Lisa Kudrow, that she’s a comedic genius.

I’m sorry, I just don’t see it. Her acting is horrid! She almost killed Analyze This. That movie is hilarious until her scenes. She kills it. Very bad casting choice.

My second nominee is Colin Quinn.
Now, I’m a comic junkie. I love stand up, skits, all of it and everybody. But when I watch Colin, the “Black Hole of Comedy”, he just sucks the life out of comedy.
I can’t believe he keeps getting his own shows on Comedy Central. What’s up with that?
His current show is a great concept, but I cannot take it more than five minutes because his humor kills the mood.

Any others?

I think part of Colin Quinn’s problem is that he’s clearly not very bright. Maybe that sounds snotty, but (as I think I posted somewhere else recently) I never make it more than a sentence or two into his opening monologue anymore. Last night’s Daily Show was, in my opinion, unbelievably funny - so I leapt up and shut the TV off so I Quinn couldn’t kill the joy I was feeling. He apparently has no idea what he’s supposed to be talking about, so he’ll say something totally unrelated or something totally uninformed. This wouldn’t matter much if he was funny, of course.

You stated the case so well that I don’t know who else to add.

I agree with Lisa Kudrow, her whole “wierd” shctick is not funny at all. What was her last movie, the one with the rapper? That movie’s popularity explains it all.

My nominee: Adam Sandler
Yeah I know some people are probably going to defend him. But I’ve seen all his movies, (except for that artsy one) and never found any funny. They all have the same plot, dysfunctional guy, beats up people, gets the girl. Which is sad because apparently he is a good actor.

In Canada we have a guy named Michael McDonald. He’s one of those types that manages to get on Canadian TV, but can’t break through elsewhere, due to a lack of talent. He’s still doing I’ve-fallen-and-I-can’t-get-up jokes.

Incidentally, his “arty movie”, Punch Drunk Love has the exact same plot.

It wasn’t bad, but how P.T. Anderson pulled a fast one on every critic to think an Adam Sandler was some cinematic triumph is beyond me.

Well, it was more this: Adam Sandler movies were generally unfunny, surreal to the point of stupidity, and all featured the same sort of plot. P-DL was an Adam Sandler movie that was actually funny in points, provoked actual emotion in the viewer, had Adam Sandler not just coasting along and being himself, and was surreal in a good way.

Look everyone, it’s Formulaic Adam Sandler Movie!

Wenn ist das Nunstuck git und slotermeyer? Ja! Beiherhund das oder die flipperwald gersput!

Sam Kennoson (however you spell it) I hated when he’d guest star on sitcoms. Yeah you hate your wife and scream alot. Very funny. Brings any show he was in to a crashing halt. One guy I didn’t mind when he croaked.

Ditto for Chris Farley. I guess he might have been talented. I dunno just seemed to be a sweaty fat guy being spastic everywhere. Even when he was supposed to be the center of attention I found him distracting.

I generally find Jim Carey very unfunny. Perhaps its just me. He seems to rely too much upon being weird and pulling faces. “Dumb and Dumber” was one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen.

David Brenner.

Please. Shut. Up.

You are a hack. But no ordinary hack, oh no.

You somehow manage to take unfunny, hackneyed material and transform it into a sort of “negative comedy.” You can suck humor from a room in such a complete and metaphysical way that I’m surprised you haven’t been weaponized.

Watch her in “The Opposite of Sex,” one of the few times she hasn’t been cast as a ditz. She was amazing, and had all the best lines (as Lucia ).

My choice would be Jason Alexander, who manages to ruin everything he touches.

But the greatest soundbite ever came from one:

“Oh no! We suck again!”

I still say that to myself every now and then when things go wrong.

Didn’t we just do this thread a day or two ago? Went like 3 pages? :confused: In any event, I will repeat the inalienable truth one more time. Nobody is less funny that the Prince of Anti-Humor himself- Carrot Top. Nobody.

Compare every name listed here to Carrot Top. See. Proof- he is the worse ever. Sent to kill humor off entirely by Satan himself.

:mad:

Once I mention the guy I’m going to mention, there will be no need to continue the thread, as he is the ultimate unfunny “comedian.”

A. Whitney Brown.

In his 1990’s appearances on SNL, he would show up during the Weekend Update segment and talk for around five minutes. Not once did I (or anyone else in the audience, not even slightly) laugh. Except, of course, for himself–well, it was more of a cracked-voice giggle as he talked. So freaking bad.

Here is the other thread- slightly different at the start, but the two seem to be converging.

Gallagher gets my vote for worst comic. Dave Chappelle did an imitation of him a few weeks back that was spot-on.

Generally most prop comedians get the thumbs-down from me.

Bob Saget
Mark Curry

Those two are just plain aweful commitees. There are dozens more that I’ll probably think of later.

Something got terribly lost in the translation:

If that is git and more slotermeyer now stucco? Yes! Beiherhund that or flipperwald gersput!

Stucco?

The ultimate king of humor-free comedy is Tom Arnold, hands down.

Gilbert Godfried.