[QUOTE=I guess I’m roasting in there hereafter.[/QUOTE]
That’s why you don’t get a toaster when you come out. Fortunately they do provide free pitchforks. :rolleyes:
That’s why you don’t get a toaster when you come out. Fortunately they do provide free pitchforks. :rolleyes:
I came out of the closet about 16 years ago in high school. Let’s see, my friends were the first people I told and later it got around to the family. I lost a few friends here and there. It hurt at the time but I realized that they weren’t really my friends if that was an issue to them.
It wasn’t really strenuous for me. I never really cared what other people thought. The only hard part was coming to terms with my gayness to myself. I took the same stance with my parents as you did. I wouldn’t outright tell them but I wouldn’t deny it either. So, eventually my mother asked me if I was gay and I turned beet red. From there I thought I would lie but I didn’t. I said yes. And she then asked if I had AIDS yet. Thanks mom.
My father on the other hand ignored it completely. He wouldn’t ask or talk about it for quite a long time. Eventually, he said that he didn’t care who I loved because he still loved me. That was pretty nice.
My sister actually asked me before my parents and when I said I was gay she cried for a day and then was fine. She said she just didn’t want to see me hurt. That was really sweet. She had imagined that being gay was all about being bashed and HIV. Now, my sister is a pretty radical leftist. She has been out and about rallying for various gay rights and women’s rights causes and not even a lesbian. I don’t know if she would be doing anything like that if it weren’t for her coming to terms with my gayness earlier. Maybe but she had a little bit of a change in there somewhere.
As for the extended family, the side that I thougth was more accepting and liberal turned out not to be. The redneck side turned out to be great and have no problems with it at all.
I just my coming out was like Queer Duck’s rendition of his coming out day where people threw flowers and hugged him etc.
I clicked on the link and got this messege -
Us Brits not good enough or something?
Well, oops. I had planned on not telling them until I was safely nestled away at college. However, they say my new backpack and checkbook, my mom asked “What are you doing with that??? Are you gay or something?” and I thought for half a second, and didn’t want to lie to her, so I said “Yes,” and the conversation continued. My dad doesn’t care. My mom asked me a couple of questions, but has been in hard-core denial mode since, which I guess is partly my fault. My dad and I have pulled the wool over her eyes so many times that she’s become suspicious of anything.
I don’t know, though… I do feel a bit sorry for her, because a few months ago, I bitched at her because she said something to me, and (it was related at the time) I told her there was a lot she didn’t know about me, and she was offended. In that span, she has found out that I’m an atheist (agnostic, more specifically, but that label doesn’t quite fit… (Wow, that destroyed her for a while. She’s Christian, with firm beliefs, although not religious, had assumed that I would be since she’s my mother)), am gay, and have smoked pot fairly regularly for 4 years. I do think now, though, that all of the major things I hadn’t told her are out in the open now, and I think it’ll make things better in the long run.
Oh well, it had to be done eventually, and it eliminates some of the lying that would have had to take place. I just hope that she does accept it. During her questioning she had this look on her face, like she walked into a room that was filled with shit, and smelled really bad. I’m glad I typed all this now. I feel better.
In my first year at university I met my soul mate. I was a single Mom with a three year old. This guy was every thing I’d ever wanted and he loved my son. I loved him more than anything. We dated for two years and I felt that we would be together forever. He dumped me. I was devastated. He wanted to continue to be in my life and my son’s life. I went through hell, learned to deal with it and became his friend. Many years later, he had moved away, I found out that he is gay. He has avoided me consistently since he came out. I miss him and wish he would relax. I’m not sure why he avoids me but I’m sure in his mind there is some sort of guilt, confusion…whatever, I just miss him. Let people accept you. Don’t assume they won’t. Trust the folks you love.