Rock Stars have kidnapped my son!
Mrs. Robinson, are you trying to seduce me?
We’ll always have Paris. We didn’t have…we’d lost it. Til you came back.
WE are the music makers. And we are the dreamers of the dreams.
You know how to whistle, don’t you? You just put your lips together…and blow.
Tango’s easy. Not like life. You get tangled up, you just tango on.
There is a great deal of difference between looking at a thing and seeing a thing.
You are NOT leaving this house dressed as Adolph Hitler!
[Shows a picture from his wallet]
- Here’s a picture of my sister. If you let us go you can have her. I hear she’s quite good.
Hillary Flammond: My uncle was born in America.
Nick Rivers: Oh, really?
Hillary Flammond: But he was one of the lucky ones. He managed to escape in a balloon during the Jimmy Carter presidency.
Skeet Surfing!
"We thought about it for a long time, “Endeavor to persevere.” And when we had thought about it long enough, we declared war on the Union. "
"You will give your rifle a girl’s name because this is the only pussy you people are going to get. Your days of finger-banging ol’ Mary J. Rottencrotch through her pretty pink panties are over. "
“Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.”
“Hey how am I driving, man?
I think we’re parked.”
“Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father: prepare to die. Now, offer me money.”
“Dyin’ ain’t much of a living boy.”
"My thoughts drift back to erect nipple wet dreams about Mary Jane Rottencrotch and the Great Homecoming Fuck Fantasy. I am so happy that I am alive, in one piece and short. I’m in a world of shit… yes. But I am alive. And I am not afraid. "
Put…the candle…BACK.
Afghanistan, bananastand.
Welease Bwian!
An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind.
The bad stuff is easier to believe. You ever notice that?
No, you relax, you’re the dead guy!
There’s no money, there’s no weed. It’s all been replaced by a pile of corpses.
Can you run? I think not… I think not.
It’s depressing that the words “secret agent” have become synonymous with “sex maniac.”
Your mother mates out of season.
You taught me that people will do anything for a potato.
Eat something, I’m begging you! You look like a swizzle stick.
A crowd is easier to control than an individual. A crowd has a common purpose. The purpose of the individual is always in question.
For the kids, you know?
I’ve seen The Exorcist 131 times and it keeps getting funnier EVERY SINGLE TIME!
He may pork her, Rusty. Eat your breakfast.
Real Tomato ketchup, Eddie?
Nothin’ but the best!
Anya you HOMOS touch me, I kill ya!
Lighten up, Francis.
We fear change.
Watch out for your cornhole, man.
I love the smell of napalm in the morning. Smells like… victory.
Juuuuust a bit outside.
How 'bout a Fresca!
Jim never has a second cup of coffee at home.
Piss Boy!
I’ve always wanted to fight a desperate battle against incredible odds!
Bring back some beer… and some cleaning products.
“Are you sure you’re not screwing this kid? Somebody ought to.”
“You son of a bitch. You’re a virgin, aren’t you?”
“Technically.”
“Lee Harvey Oswald and Charles Whitman, two good examples of what a Marine with a rifle can do.”
Okay, I know this to be Eleanor of Aquitaine, but I have to guess at the movie. Katherine Hepburn, perhaps, in Lions in Midwinter?
Professor Harold Hill, The Music Man, 1961.
And my contributions:
*- 500.
- 500 what, douchebag?
- 500 fights. That’s the number I figurred when I was a kid. 500 street fights and you could consider yourself a legitimate tough guy. You need 'em for experience. To develop leather skin. So I got started. [Of] course along the way you stop thinking about being tough and all that. Stops being the point. [You] get past the silliness of it all but then, after, you realize that’s what you are.
- Look, I got no problem with you, alright?
- I tell you you learn a lot of things on the way 500. None more important than this: * suckerpunch
and
If you’re gonna send someone to save the world, make sure he likes it the way it is.