Twelve years ago my sister and her husband, after trying unsuccessfully for three years to conceive through IVF, adopter a little boy. Three months later, my sister became pregnant and they had a healthy baby girl. FWIW, in that instance, the issue was apparently brother-in-law’s low sperm count (probably not a technical term.)
It seems that everyone I tell this story to has heard of this happening or knows someone it happened to and the general agreement is that it’s quite common. I wonder because I know three couples who adopted because they could not have a baby (I know other people who’ve adopted, but not because they had trouble conceiving.) Two of the three - my sister and a work acquaintance - were pregnant less than a year of adopting. Another couple - a cousin and his wife - have not conceived, and in fact adopted three children over the course of seven or eight years.
Has this ever truly been looked into and are there clear numbers that make the case one way or another? Is it confirmation bias - I’m assuming that most couples do not get pregnant after adopting, but people don’t bring them up in anecdotes?
I’m suspecting confirmation bias, but since this appears to be a very persistent myth I’m surprised there isn’t any hard data to contradict the myth. Which is why I wonder if there may be, actually, some truth to this.
Does anyone have any actual data on this? (Mods feel free to move if this goes in IMHO direction but I’m mainly curious about whether there’s been any scientific research.)
I remember seeing on TV a story about a couple who had tried unsuccessfully for a long time to conceive. They finally gave up hope and adopted two children. Subsequently, the wife became pregnant and gave birth to quadruplets.
This was around the mid-to-late 1960s. I am pretty sure the show was To Tell the Truth. I think it was the wife who was the contestant, who sat among the two imposters to be questioned by the panel. But I remember the father also appearing (he may have been brought on after the wife’s identity had been revealed). I was around 6-8 years old, and I remember my mother answering a lot of my questions!
So while this doesn’t actually answer your question, it does indicate that it was rare enough to be showcased as described, at least as of the mid-to-late 1960s.
Prior thread - basically, the pregnancy rate for unexplained infertile couples who adopt is the same as that for unexplained infertile couples who don’t - about 5%.
Ah. I did search first but this didn’t come up. Interesting thread and thank you. Makes me glad I didn’t bring up the “stress hypothesis.”
However, my question still stands: Where is the data supporting the 5 percent number? Someone said it online and it may well be true - but I put this in GQ because I’m looking for something more substantial than “someone said it online.”
I’m perfectly willing to accept the confirmation bias reasoning.
I just can’t believe there hasn’t been a single study that tracks parents after adoption because of failure to conceive?
I don’t think you’re looking for stats on “adoption because of failure to conceive”, but “because of previous inability to have children” or some such.
My mother had three healthy children but a minimum of 6 miscarriages, several of them before my birth (I’m the eldest). A bunch of miscarriages correspond to someone who’s able to conceive but who for some reason has difficulty reaching term.
My younger brother is living proof that this can occur. My parents had been trying (unsuccessfully) for children for 8 years until they decided to adopt. Four years after I was adopted my brother was conceived naturally. I don’t know what medical reasons there might have been but it certainly wasn’t a case that they ‘could’nt’ have children.
Something like that happened to my husband’s parents. They had him, then lost at least two to miscarriage. They adopted their daughter, then their younger son was born about a year after his sister’s birth (less than a year after the adoption).
Excellent point, bolding mine.
I’m sorry your mother had so many miscarriages, that must have been really hard for her. Glad she persisted though.
This too. I certainly know this was the case with my brother and sister in law because they’d been told his sperm count was so low as to make conception impossible. Apparently they were told wrong.* (And I’m pretty sure my sister wasn’t having sex with anyone else.)
*Hmmm. A clinic wouldn’t tell a couple that it was impossible for them to conceive in order to sell them IVF treatments. Would they…?