My dad took this up after my mother died. She was the decorator by default, so I found it interesting that he actually cared enough to move some pieces around.
It didn’t stop though. 7 years later I’d come over (he was in his late 80s then) to find he moved the bed to the other side of the room. Or all the living room furniture to new spots. Every few weeks he was moving something around. Was worrying he’d hurt himself at his age. Never figured out if there were other motivations involved. Did the apt not feel homey without mom? Just boredom? Dunno.
He’s in a nursing home now, where he doesn’t move anything in his room. So it didn’t translate to a new location.
By “who cares” I mean what’s the big deal about rearranging the furniture once in a while. I honestly see nothing wrong with it, unless it’s something totally neurotic like moving everything about every week for years and years. If that’s what they’re doing, then yes, I would see that as a problem.
The OP makes me miss my mother, who also had a habit of rearranging furniture all the time. I think her thing was that she was simply not satisfied with the life her finances allowed. That’s not to say she was unhappy with my father: just that she wished she ahd a bigger house and the room to be elegant.
I just wish I had the time to vaccuum more often. I can’t help thinking these are folks who could do some volunteer work. It just seems an enormous waste of time and energy.
Didn’t Dave Barry address this?
[QUOTE=Dave Barry]
without women, virtually every piece of furniture in the world would still be in its original position. Guys do not have a basic need to rearrange furniture. Whereas a woman who could cheerfully use the same computer for fifty-three years will rearrange her furniture on almost a weekly basis, sometimes in the dead of night.
[/QUOTE]
LOL! the operative descriptor there being “ex” I presume? That would make a great sitcom episode. He walks in, trips over the sofa, she walks in, breaks the eggs when she drops the grocery bag where she put the sofa. . .
My ex-Darling Marcie would sometimes get up and move stuff just because she couldn’t sleep and had to have something to do. Her real mania was painting; she would sometimes leave a particular color on the walls but generally she’d repaint a wall she had painted just a month previously. It drove me insane; it’s peculiar that I miss her the way I do.
It sounds like she is dissatisfied with the way her home looks, and is trying to fix it. It’s probably a mild compulsion. It sounds pretty harmless. As a guest in her home, I would help move a couch occasionally and ignore it otherwise. YMMV
I am so glad to read this. My mother is 84 this year and she is still doing it. Every day. If she doesn’t go out she does it in the evening. I know she hates being on her own but she has family visit every day and this has been going on for as long as I can remember. I am 57 years old. Mother also changes curtains constantly and if you say something to her she gets upset. I am now frightened she will hurt herself but that wouldn’t stop her. Someone out there must know what it is. If it’s a compulsive disorder which it sounds like Please help as I fear for my mothers welfare. I wish I could help this poor lad but i can’t but I’m glad we are not on our own. Thankyou for sharing it with us.
My ex roommate/landlord jokes that her house was actually several inches smaller on the inside than when she bought it from all the coats of paint. She too used to rearrange the room constantly.
If I was psychoanalyzing it - I would say it springs from a general dissatisfaction in her life - but I’m no doctor.
I tend to change things around as needed (new furniture, party/guest accomodations, etc.). I have been in my place for a year and moved in with very limited furniture, so I’m still re-arranging everything as I add things.
Now you have me curious how often I actually change things around. I kind of move a lot, so y’know, it’s all relative.
I read one of the posts where it said that you should try taking a picture of it every time it’s new and then confronting the person about it. I think it’s a great idea. Anything could help.
I have been drawing all week to find out how to arange my single 12m^2 dorm room. And i’ll be honest it’s not easy.
sometimes i think it comes from the fact that back home my parents would never allow me to move anything around. But i did it anyway. because i couldn’t just Not move things around. When i see something i think could be improved i start by drawing it on a piece of paper, and then i do it. The worst thing is, I get this feeling deep down in the pitt of my stomach when i don’t do it. The worst is that when i think of it i think i know why i do this.
We have moved around a lot in my younger years. Every new place involved the opening of boxes. LOTS AND LOTS OF BOXES. And the older i got the more my parents stoped helping me with the rearanging, so I just started doing it all on my own. I havnøt been neglected. if i needed something heavy moved somewhere else my mom or dad would help me, and they also loved hearing my out about my plans.
But the problem is that now i do it all of the time. Sometimes i have to neglect homework because i can’t handle sitting in the same part of the room. I find small flaws in all the placements of my furniture a week or something after I’ve put it there.
So as i said. I come from a home where no one ever moves anything around. The moment my parents stoped moving countries they stped moving furniture. But i didn’t i do it all of the time. I can’t handle the things being the same place! It hurts deep down inside after a week. And i don’t know what to do about that.
My boyfreind helps me. And he thinks it’s cute. But we don’t live together and he is a soldier so he is only here in the weekends. But he wants us to move in together and i fear that since he is so much of a home boy, and the type who likes things to be slow and nice and comfy, would find it irritating if i didn’t. But I also know that if I am not allowed to move my things around then i irritated and sometimes stressed by it and i feel hurt and stressed and out of controle.
It doesn’t have to be genetic, but I think any help would be amazing. I mean if you know you sortof have a problem then something like reading some print outs of people who have written about their own experiences would be helpful, just to see if you feel like that too. But telling them straight up that they should stop wont help. It will just be very hurtful and unconsiderate.
or not, depending on the week.