I will try this, it’ll be hard and I’ve got to get past the slight ew factor, but I’ll poke them a bunch of times, gently and just the white of course.
As sachertorte and El Nene have said, the optometrist has to determine the right size and fit so I have to stay with him, I have to describe how it feels and how I see most importantly, once I have them on. 
A lot of it is just practice. It is really weird at first, but after a bit you don’t even think about it.
I’ve put other people’s contacts in for them, but I’m not sure how much luck I’d have with someone else sticking their finger in my eye.
I’d bug him some more about letting you try. If it’s not working for you to let him do it, he should let you. Make him at least give you a really good reason why - not just “cuz that’s how I usually do it”.
The tip about having your finger dry so the contact doesn’t stick is a good one.
I also look right at the contact as I put it in and stick it straight onto where I’m looking, but that’s not how I did it to start with. I can also do it vertically now, and one-handed (without holding my upper lid), but not when I first started wearing them. (Of course, as I said, I was in hard contacts and they’re a bit different. I’m not sure they even exist any more!)
The strangest was one time when I tapped my glasses with my thumbnail reaching up to scratch my nose or something. A few minutes later, I realized I had tapped my contact in my eye without even realizing it!
I had problems with someone sticking their finger in my eye, so when I was being fitted the opt tried a couple of times, and then let me try. It took a couple of goes, but definitely easier than someone else doing it. Ask if you can put them in and have him check them instead.
I’m pretty sure I had to put mine in the first time as well. Even after 10+ years with them, I still look up and put them in under my pupil, then slide them up. I think it’s just bizarre that he a) won’t let you try, and b) doesn’t want you to hold your eyelids open. I don’t think I’ve ever been able to get them in without holding my eyes open, and still occasionally have to retry if my eyelid slips out of my finger while I’m putting the contact in.
I generally have my finger fairly dry (after washing, of course), because I find that the contact is attracted to the moist surface. If my finger is covered with saline solution, it’s less likely to want to adhere to my eye, and can come back onto my finger.
One more thing you could try (if he lets you put them in, of course, and if he doesn’t, I agree with the people saying to take your business elsewhere) is not using a mirror. I stopped using one pretty damn early on, and never found it all that helpful. I think part of the problem with a mirror is that your eyes move in tandem (obviously), so while you’re watching intently to try to see where the lens is, it’s making the eye you’re putting it in move in undesirable ways.
What I do is hold my eyelids open (left thumb on top, right middle on bottom) and watch as my index finger gets really close to my pupil. Just before I touch my eye, I look up and put the lens in. When I know it’s off my finger, I keep my upper eyelid in place, and slowly massage my lower eyelid and look down until the lens slides in place.
Wow… I got lenses a few years ago now (maybe 3 years? In and around there) and they certainly didn’t put my lenses in for me! And measuring? The Dr did his thing and ordered a pair of lenses. I think he measured somehow as he was doing that for what he felt would be the best lense for me. The first time I went in was an hour appointment and the lady who did the teaching showed/told me how to do it and let me go at it.
Practiced putting them in and taking them out a few times once I had it down and they let me go. Had to come back a week or so later to check and see if the lenses felt okay/fit right or if I needed something a little different. (I didn’t, so they ordered me more and sent me on my way again).
The lady told me I was among the faster group at putting them in and taking them out, but I also was a weird kid and when I saw Ace Ventura absolutely HAD to touch my eyeball just like him… Bonus: It freaked out my brother.
Acorns, this definitely isn’t standard practice. You should be putting them in yourself. The doc doesn’t need to be there with you either; just a nurse or an assistant of some sort. I struggled mightily with mine initially, but for 12 years they’ve made me extremely happy. Ask to go to a room with a makeup mirror and just keep on trying yourself.
Another hint - unless you have an astigmatism or some special condition, I strongly suggest you ask for a pair of daily disposable lenses. They are the thinnest and easiest to put in. You don’t have to buy 'em, but they’ll be easiest to practice with.
Another suggestion - a good doctor should tell you to build up to wearing them all day. As in, for several days you only wear 'em say 3 hours hours, next few days you wear 'em 4 hours, up to 8 or 10 hours/day.
Another tip - if you can’t get daily disposables (just to try out - they’re way too expensive to invest in unless you have allergies) to try out, ask to have a trial pair. Say that specifically, so he doesn’t count the pair you’re trying out as part of your purchase or order. You may have to print out certificates online saying you’re “entitled” to a trial pair. Then wear them the full time (as in, wear them a month, or 2 weeks, or whatever). If you don’t like them - if you find yourself putting in lots of drops or general itchiness or anything - ask for another trial pair. A good doctor will allow you several trial pairs. After ten years of having an astigmatism (both near AND farsightedness) my farsightedness faded enough so that I just needed standard nearsighted contacts. That meant changing contact lens brands. Despite having worn the same brand of lenses for 10 years, I tried 4 different new brands until I found one that was really comfortable.
So 1) Ask to put them in yourself. 2) Try looking up at the ceiling once you get them in so they won’t ‘slip’ out of your eye 3) Try them out the FULL amount of time, then decide whether or not to get a year’s worth. If not, 4) Try multiple other pairs till you find a good one.
For general nearsightedness with a high water content (therefore more likely to be comfortable) I highly recommend Bausch & Lomb Purevision. They’re thicker and more gel-like, but they stay cleaner and clearer longer than most.
And of course, when you do choose a brand of lenses, only buy 6 months if that’s what your insurance will cover, and buy the rest online from a reputable place. Online contacts are upwards of 50% cheaper than in the store. Also, be SURE to check out Staining Grid so that you choose a compatible contact lens solution. Note, for example that the new Biotrue stuff, while great for Acuvue Oasys, is hell on wheels for my lenses, Purevision. The worst lenses I’d used, Biofinity, actually work great with nearly every brand of solution, so don’t go by the grid to choose a pair of lenses.
What the hell kind of contacts are you getting? When I get contacts, I buy 6 months worth all at once. I’ve never heard of a contact lens that will “go off” in such a short amount of time.
So, he just tells you to open wide? This isn’t a dentist appointment. The eye is naturally inclined to close when something comes toward it.
I am another one who has never had someone else put my contacts in for me. I was 16 when I got my first pair. My eye doctor found my prescription, measured my eye with that handy dandy machine he had, and then gave me a pair to put in. This was 14 years ago. Have things regressed since then so now they have to use trial and error to find a pair that fits? I only had to start using trial and error when they decided to start correcting for my very minor astigmatism. I tried the usual ones but couldn’t see well. I tried to toric lenses and still couldn’t see. Then they tried me in aspheric and life was good. Even then though, my doctor knew which size I needed before he went into his supply cabinet.
Oh, another thing, my eye doctor wouldn’t even fit me for lenses until I could touch both eyeballs with my finger. It was a waste of his time and mine to go through the fitting just to find out that you can’t put the damn thing in.
If he wont let you do it yourself, get your prescription and go somewhere else.
They do exist, at least in one form: RGP (Rigid Gas Permeable lenses) as in Paragon CRT lenses. I wear them. I put the lenses in at night before I go to bed; when I wake up in the morning, I take them out, and can see fine all day long. They reshape the cornea while you’re sleeping. The effect is temporary; I can go up to three days without wearing them if I have been wearing them nightly for a few nights in a row.
It’s actually pretty cool; You have a a lot of visits at first, to verify the lenses are in fact doing their necessary deed; after that, just the once every year or two checkup. Otherwise, you never have to worry about losing a lens in your eye, your eyes bugging you during the day, losing them in the pool - you get the idea. Plus, the little buggers are DURABLE. My current pair of contacts is over two years old and still work fine - they are designed to last 12 to 18 months on average. They are for nearsightedness only, but will deal with astigmatism. They are not for all, as having hard lenses can take some getting used to (they are … Itchy? on the inside of the eyelid if you look around while they are in) but I am wearing them right now and it’s no big deal. I generally put them in an hour before bed, suft the net or watch tv, and go to bed. Then, up in the morning, the lenses come out, and I don’t have to think about it. If I’m too tired to bother putting them in, or just don’t feel like it, then I don’t have to worry - I will still see fine the next day.
I got contacts for the first time when I was in first year at university. What a revelation! I had peripheral vision for the first time ever! It was like cinemavision!
They put them in the first time to test them and all. Then I had to put them in. And that took me two hours. Just being very patient and getting past the blink reflex.
My first lenses were a single long-lasting pair that I had to clean and rinse and all. The lenses I get now are CooperVision ProClears. I have a set of ten pairs, each good for a couple of months of daily wear and taking them out at night, and they have a four-year expiry date marked on the package. They have a slight blue tint that lets me find them in the container.
I have taught about 2000 people how to use contact lenses. I have a better than 98% success rate. I work for an ophthalmology practice, but I am NOT a doctor. I’m a dispensing optician. A few things:
You do not have a valid prescription until your doctor says you do, so you can’t just demand it and go elsewhere. Going elsewhere means starting over. Contacts are regulated by the FDA as a medical device. You can ask about specific brands, but you don’t get to actually choose. Most doctors will ask you whether you want daily, 2-week, or monthly replacement.
I would not trust a doctor who would allow you to “learn” unsupervised. Yes, I have seen people screw up their corneas by doing it wrong.
I insert the lenses for the patient the first time. If the patient insists on trying themselves, I give them a few tries. It’s all about time management. We don’t charge for the teaching session, so every hour I spend with a patient is money the practice is spending. I also SHOW the patient what to do by sitting face-to-face and inserting lenses into my own eyes. My teaching sessions typically last about an hour, and include insertion, then showing the patient how, then having the patient remove and reinsert, then going over care and handling. I’m extremely thorough, because I truly want my patients to be able to wear contact lenses for the rest of their lives if that’s what they want to do.
MY main concern is not your ability to insert the lens, but your ability to remove it. If you can’t get it in, you can’t wear it. If you can’t get it out, you’re a LOT more likely to end up with an injury or infection.
I know it sounds ridiculous, but try to relax. I’ve seen a LOT of people forget to breathe while they are trying. I advise people to eat something before they come to see me-I’ve had 2 people pass out on me, and one was a big guy who stood up and fell into my arms. It bothers me that the tech isn’t holding your lids open. I just don’t understand that one! I use a 2-handed method, to keep both lids out of my way. I almost never need a third try when insterting lenses into someone’s eyes.
If it doesn’t work out when you go back, ask the prescribing doctor if there is someone else who can try to teach you. While my success rate is very high, occasionally, I get someone who simply is not comfortable with me, and one of my coworkers will step in. Works almost every time.
If you’re given the opportunity to try yourself, try this: Put the lens on the tip of the index finger of your dominant hand. (as others have suggested, wet lens, dry finger) With the middle finger of the same hand, get VERY close to your bottom lashes, and pull the lower lid down until you can see the pink, inside area. Put your nondominant hand up over your head, and reach down to grab your upper lid (this keeps your fingers out of your way). You can grab the lashes, if that’s easier for you. You don’t have to pull the upper lid up too much, but you do need to control it. Tip your chin down, and look upwards at the mirror. This exposes a lot of the white part of your eye. Now, focus on the eye you want to insert into, by using the other eye to watch the mirror. Place the lens against your eyeball, being careful not to hit your lids or lashes. It’s just like putting a suction cup on a mirror. Once you get the circumference of the lens to touch your eye, push some of the air out of it. KEEP HOLDING THE UPPER LID. Once the lens is “stuck” to your eye, look into it by looking downward a bit. Once the lens is centered, you can release the upper lid. I swear this is not as involved in practice as it is in print! If you release the upper lid, or blink, before the lens is centered on your cornea, you’re probably going to knock it out of your eye.
It is typically more difficult for men than for women the first time around. This is because women poke at themselves a lot more than men do, and many of us have injured ourselves learning to apply mascara LOL
Don’t sleep with them in. And don’t wear them in water. Google “acanthamoeba keratitis”. Nasty. Also, corneal ulcers are no fun. Remember, you are wrapping your cornea with a foreign object. Clean them thorougly, every time you take them out.
After the first time, it will never be that hard again. Good luck!
I’ll admit that I’m having trouble picturing the situation you describe, but trying eight times sounds like it might take about five minutes. It is typical for a person who has just started using contact lenses to take half an hour or longer to get the contact lenses into place.
Upon re-reading my post, it sounds like I’m just jumping on the bandwagon of saying this practice sounds unusual without offering any real advice. The best advice really is to just touch your eye. When I first got contacts, it was a real feat just to be able to touch my eyeball before I blinked. The entire point of blinking is to keep harmful objects out of your eye, and it will take years to train your body to not consider your finger a harmful object.
congodwarf, the type of contacts ordered for me are monthly disposables and going by what he said, I only have one more week of getting wear out of them.
I have bad astigmatism so they had to order in “special” contacts for me, their words! It’s good to know from the replies that it took some time for other people aswell because,
I booked an appointment for an eye exam as I hadn’t had one for a while, I was a little tense during because it had been years since anyone has been close to my eyes, so during the exam, things went ok, nothing out of the ordinary happened and at the end I mentioned (to the same man who is fitting my contacts) that I wanted to try contacts but I was kind of nervous about it, he said “if you’re nervous about it, I don’t recommend wearing them, because I’m the one who has to fit them.”
This struck me as a completely stupid attitude, he told me he had been in the profession for many years, so he’s never come across a patient who isn’t apprehensive about contact lens? He insisted that my mother be there during the appointment, I almost suggested “You sure you don’t want your mother there instead?” but that wouldn’t have helped really would it…
I didn’t act like a gibbering wreck during the exam, I didn’t cry, I didn’t behave abnormally. Only thing different was that my shoulders were up to my ears with tension.
So yeah just wanted to get that out as it pissed me off at the time but I never told anyone about it.
WishIHadACoolName your advice is amazing, I do have a prescription and am in the UK but don’t know if I can go elsewhere, also you mentioned about asking someone else to fit them for me, he’s the only one there who can officially insert the contacts, he is the contacts guy, the only one.
Gig-gi-ty?
I disagree about touching your eye. Contact lenses are typically very, VERY wet with solution when they are inserted, and all you are aware of is the wetness and maybe coolness of the solution. You blink, and it settles down perfectly where it should be. This is so different from anything dry touching your eye. Do you have any problems putting drops in your eyes? My suggestion is to look at something just beyond the doctor’s finger as it approaches your eye. Stare at it, keep your focus on it, tune out the finger, just concentrate totally on that thing. When the lens makes contact with your eye, there is no discomfort whatsoever–it’s covered with the same type of liquid that is already on your eye–it’s like tears welling up. You blink, it’s over. I understand how you feel but you are far more worried about this than the situation calls for. How easy it is to say relax, but the fact is that this is really no big deal. His finger is not touching your eye, the lens is there to protect your eye from his finger. Good luck.
Actually, I’m not overly worried about it, it’s just getting my eye to behave how I want and not go into reflex mode, it can be frustrating. I didn’t know about the liquid being the same as tears, so thanks!
I’m going to offer another plug for rigid gas-permeables. I love mine, have been wearing them for 15+ years, and each pair is rated for 12-18 months (and that’s a minimum–if you take proper care of them, they can last 4-5 with no issues, at least according to my optometrist).
Conversely, I cannot get disposables to work at all–they totally skeeve me out.
I’ve worn contacts for about 20 years and cannot put them in without holding my eyelids. I also switch between contacts and glasses now to stretch them and have never ever heard of contacts with such a short shelf life. Your doctor doesn’t sound like much of a specialist frankly.
I’m the opposite. I pop disposables in, don’t even think about them for two weeks beyond a couple drops in the morning and night, take them out and toss them. I can’t imagine having to care for a single delicate pair, taking them out and putting them in every single day for over a year. THAT’S skeevy to me.
I do not recommend this.
(1) Poking your eye is not a good idea.
(2) You won’t be able to desensitize yourself by Thursday anyway.
This optometrist sounds like an idiot. I’ve been wearing contacts for over 15 years, and there is no way in hell you’d get one in my eye w/o holding the lids. I’ve also never had anyone else put them in for me, including the first time.
And what’s this nonsense about them expiring in 3 weeks? They don’t self-destruct or anything. I’m supposed to throw mine away after 3 weeks, and they usually last 2-3 months. I’m sure many here will tell me about how I’m going to go blind, etc, but the OP hasn’t even been wearing them, they won’t disintegrate 3 weeks after the package is opened.
I’d go back to this doc one more time to try to convince him to let you get them in yourself. If that works, great, but it would still be the last time I ever went to that optometrist.